Follow the rabbit hole into a land of red
The white rabbit takes the lead
As you fall down the abyss
Can you see yourself Alice?

Alice
Are you proud of what you've done
Inhaling colourful smoke for fun
Are you happy with what has become?
Are you happy with what you have done?

Tick-tok
***-for-tat
The hatters trail
Stained red
What once was baby blue
Fades into grey
Splattered scarlet

Alice are you satisfied yet?
As Mad hatter hat sits on you head
And cheshire cowers
Too scared to aproach
Alice have you had enough yet?

Piercing echoes
And flying red
Stains what once was sun kissed hair
With a lick of the tongue
Copper taste
The heart becomes her mark

Alice
Are you proud of what you've done
Running wonderland done one by one
As the hooka smoke and mushrooms
Gotten through
Does the caterpillar make a good throne?

How ironic the heart
Is what you hate
Yet its mark marrs you face
Alice, not Alice, queen

I usually hate
putting the word I
when writing
because
I don't like writing for me

but on few occasions
when inspired by music
frustration
and tears
and Melanie Martinez blasting in the back

I don't care
if my heart is too big
My eyes
I have no control over
and I'm tired
of being ridiculed
because of my tears

I show my families lies
and try to make them see
That crybaby
is not longer part of me

but in my room
on some time late in night
the faucet in my eyes from melanies song

can't take anymore.

And so I cry
So what if I'm a crybaby?

we are young
we're not quite old
not quite wise
but still our eyes
ponder away
and contemplate
things said that day.

reflections stare back
or shadows, whatever
sitting in a room
with an illuminated screen

some days, it feels the word is against us
other days, we love life
blame raging teenager hormones

for this ridiculous thoughts.

Just stupid angsty teen thoughts.

Watching from a distant crowd
tears streaming down
lies forced
onto an innocent soul
silenced
by invisible barriers
voice stolen

demons and monsters lurk in the night
words piercing the heart
cackles from the corners of the mind
as repeatedly the lies
are reflected
in the dark atmosphere

pills
therapy
'support groups'

All don't know what help is

My hear his crying in anger
desperately reaching out through a virtual screen
to rip down the lies
and stories etched
in bruises and cuts

for every truth hidden in false words
ever day living in fear
monsters disguised as men
and men treated as monster

fading, fading

bruises are fading

fading, fading

away the lies
fading, fading

who

deserves this?

fading fading

fade into my world

where all lies are faded out

fade into me

and my outstretched arms

words
strings of letters accompanied
by controlled growls
that we have somehow made intelligible

words that want want
to soothe fears and worry  
words that heal
what has been broken
words that lift
burdens of the heart
that heal poisoned scars left
by itself

actions
gestures, good and bad
actions that want to comfort
that want to hold
actions that want
to make you feel secure
actions that stitch and glue
patiently together
what has shattered and broken

words mix with actions
and actions with words
actions against actions
and words against words

a jumble of words and actions
on your behalf
words fighting actions
actions fighting words

all on your behalf

words with actions
actions with worlds

all working

on your behalf

eyes
mouth
lips
smile
not a thing
out of place

hair
laugh
hands
and fingers

feet and toes
right up to your noes

laughs
jeers
pointing and laughing
peers breaking down
the masterpiece

arms reaching
grabbing
wanting to break
beauty

beauty that outranks them
that shines so brightly
shoved behind
tears
and baggy clothes

you are beautiful
from your eyes to your nose
down to your toes

your ears and lips
even your hips

people want to break
what they can't be
but beauty my dear
is what you will forever be

You have feelings
you have emotions
you are not a puppet
you are not a thing
you are not an object
you are loved

you are you're own person
you are love
you aren't dumb
stupid
you're not pathetic

you're not indestructible
you have doubts
hate
sorrow
guilt

you have people
you are not a doll
you don't run on batteries
but on hugs
kisses
kind words
and warmth

you are not cold
you are not a freak
you are you
and
I
will
forever
Love
you.