In need of space i'm in a slump
Cleaning up the garbage, quenching the fire of the dump
I smear delicacy on a skin too familiar to coarse, salty tears
And tell the mirror to go to sleep, that rest will soothe its fears
I don't care to question if it deserves love
The answer lies in the future, determined up above
I fight for a future that continues to move
That shakes the red in an unstable groove
If I stumble all won't break
I dance atop the tightrope of fate
As I have seen the abyss, it knows me well
All too familiar is that alluring smell
I've grown to know better perfumes
I chase better things rather than the drama of threat or self sabotaging doom

Every morning, driving,
I see the orange sun rising,
trying to shove my problems
into a four-inch storage bin.
Lock it tight behind a
four-inch orange door.
Inject myself with a syringe
full of poisonous illusions,
covered in mental wounds,
I fall to the floor,
self-hate oozing.

Losing sleep,
screaming inside.
Drifting apart in my car—
I wanna call you.
My heart’s sinking,
tryna salvage good moments.
It’s a challenge
to forgive myself again.

I’m sorry.
I haven’t left
you a message.
All day, I’ve wanted
to talk to you.
Sitting in my car,
watching the orange
sun falling down,
I drift…

Any relationship,
friendship or more,
is a game of charades.
It’s messy when
two sides elaborate—
lost in gesture,
illusions and
miscommunications
that leave more questions
instead of answers.

It’s scary…
to talk,
to reach out
to someone,
sometimes—
they might hate you,
grow annoyed by your texts,
see you as a burden,
or simply walk away.
You want them to stay,
then you feel greedy,
stupid or strange to say it.

That’s the point.
Charades is never clever;
Everything is a guess—
A choice.
And each choice
is a fifty-fifty bet—
like Russian Roulette,
where you pull the trigger
to see what happens.

It gets messy…

Although we never really met, we have met
I just don't remember, our journey towards Earth's gate
We were supposed to come together, we raced on the same track
The only difference is the perfect timing, I was the only one to crack

Fellow winner, you didn't get chance to see this world
You just got back to heaven, before you were even born
Let me assure you, didn't miss much after you got lost
There isn't much in this world to see, all there is just fuss

I hope to see you again, when I met my end
Like those nine months, we will share the same bed
I don't but I hope you remember the time we have shared
After all, before all these , You and I were two brothers, one pair

God, give us  time
Let us see the river dry
Let us  see the mountain rise
Let us see the universe fall
God, why can't you make us divine

Or , God,  walk among us
Make yourself a part of us
Feel the hate that we felt
Make mistakes
Fall in love like we felt
Seek lust
Fall in despair like we felt
Get corrupt
When this is all over
God, come die among us


God,  why you want us to unite
Why you sit on the throne all alone
You hid, told us to search for you
When  he found, finally understood you
Why you took  away his  grace for loving you
When someone wants to be  free from you
Why you throw them  in fire for hating you
You  gave us a choice, set us free
Why You created hell, made us afraid
God, why you praise,  only the slave!!

God, Can you judge you?
You God! All knowing?
Don't make me laugh
Your Love for creation!
It is nothing but your bluff
You judge me??
I judge you
You are a hypocrite.