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290 · Jan 2022
the gore
Thomas Alan Jan 2022
you hacked away at my insides
like a butcher with a knife
you just kept on going
until there was no sign of life

you watched me bleed out
onto the floor
and with a sinister smile
you enjoy the gore

290 · Apr 2016
Heart is young
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
my grazed feet flood
across early floors
blank stares flock from
wide open doors
cellular hearts seize
at bridges centuries old
like cast iron barricades
never done as I'm told
             heart is young
but brain is so old
if the wires don't cross
             that's why it is cold
you can finally blame this
on my every word
as if it's always my fault
and it's never quite heard
286 · Nov 2016
locks of lion's mane
Thomas Alan Nov 2016
clouds of chamomile
and locks of lion's mane
sleeping in silence
with his biblical name
his lips as soft as snowflakes
he's my night-time in forever
he asks me when i'm waking
never, ever, ever
285 · Jan 2016
A Toast
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
Here's to the darkness
And here's to the light;
For nothing would shine
If it weren't for the night
279 · Nov 2015
Tealight
Thomas Alan Nov 2015
When I'm set aflame
I'll burn through the night
     and I’m afraid
the fire burns
     so hot and **so bright
277 · Apr 2016
Do It Myself
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
You said that you'd give
Everything to me
But I'll give it to myself
Everything single little thing
276 · Feb 2016
Thousand Piece Puzzle
Thomas Alan Feb 2016
Put together this thousand piece puzzle
I've got cities in my head
And I build them from rubble
275 · Jan 2016
Time
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
There beneath the surface
A clock-face there in two
Time forever broken
A darkened saddened hue
272 · May 2016
3am
Thomas Alan May 2016
3am
His finger in my mouth
when a whispered speak
The only exception
that made me weak
Splintered at numbers
that are left on re-dial
Watching the clock
3am denial
261 · Jan 2016
My Light
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
A galaxy of spindles
An indefinite of life
Behind a curtain of web
Lives a hidden
   blinding
            light
258 · Nov 2015
Limbo
Thomas Alan Nov 2015
you put me in limbo
        with a rope razor thin
        you placed it so low
it cut right through my *skin
258 · Nov 2022
The words that I speak
Thomas Alan Nov 2022
Dress me in purple.
In violet.
In pink.

Say that I am Abused.
Used.
Even wrongfully accused.

Tell me I’m evil.
Damaged.
A freak.

But the best parts of you
only exist in the words that I speak.
256 · Feb 2016
Tricks
Thomas Alan Feb 2016
I climbed up inside you
In a way that would weave
A heart to a heart;
With all the tricks up my sleeve

When you left in the morning
I lay there in bed
Slowing dying
From the tears that you'd shed
253 · Aug 2016
When I whisper your name
Thomas Alan Aug 2016
I spit in your fire
and it hungers my heat,
It boils
    and rages
      to my sugar beet.

Smothered to a flicker
when you curl
at a flame;
but fires won't light
when I'm whispering your name.
253 · Sep 2016
In the Autumn
Thomas Alan Sep 2016
In the Autumn
I'll let you die
And in the Autumn
I'll say goodbye
Because in the Springtime
There is life
and in the Springtime
I will be alright
252 · May 2016
Architect
Thomas Alan May 2016
Playing with an idea
that got tangled in my hands
wrapped around the concept
of all my selfish demands

I'll be the architect
of my own tragic demise
when I'm building my walls
as high as the skies
250 · Jan 2016
You
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
You
I am what you need
When you don't want anything else
You are what I want
When I can't find it somewhere else
246 · Mar 2016
Cracked at the surface
Thomas Alan Mar 2016
You need to see the light
How it beams in my eyes
The way the green changes hue
Like the mystical skies

How a sadness runs through me
Like a nail in a wall
When I cracked at the surface
But I never could fall
244 · Sep 2016
High School
Thomas Alan Sep 2016
I plagued the walls
with a delicate youth
When I ran truant
with an innocent truth
So can you take me back
to the summer of 09'
to my friends in the fields
with the bottles of cheap wine
243 · Sep 2016
A child of November
Thomas Alan Sep 2016
A child of November
that was born into the night
carried by a sadness
on a bed of hidden light

Behind his frosted eyes
is a forest of emerald green
the autumn leaves are magic
from the day of eighteen

Beneath his skin a hint
of olive yellow tone
from a pouring heart of love
never truly sewn
243 · Sep 2016
Level Crossings
Thomas Alan Sep 2016
it's framework and scaffolding
that place bridges in our pale blue sky
so can you stop at level crossings
and ask yourself why?

knotted fraying ropes
just to pull a silver moon
but behind midnight dreams
our visions are somewhat strewn
242 · Jan 2016
Pattern
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
a break in the pattern
a shot in the dark
hanging by a thread
a knot in our hearts

erasing the pages
that tear at the seams
you cast a shadow on the wall
in my land of broken dreams
239 · Apr 2016
Alone in bed
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
It's almost morning
And it's cold outside
I'm walking home
From the club, I cried

There's a silence
            I can hear it
And it feels so loud
But I saw you dancing in the crowd

If only had I listened
To the things you'd said
Then perhaps I would not
End up alone in bed
239 · Mar 2016
Walking on a wire
Thomas Alan Mar 2016
I'm walking on a wire
Close to the line
And I'm on fire
Across the hemisphere
Where it's bleak
And it's black
There's lights up ahead
Along this track
239 · Apr 2016
The Castle
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
Alone stands a castle
That resides on a hill
Surrounded by walls
Penned by Shakespeare's quill

Inside lives a heart
That is barely a beat
Destroyed by another
That lives on my overthrown seat

Time had once taught me
To rebuild the walls
To keep all them out
Before it all falls
237 · Sep 2022
Evergreen
Thomas Alan Sep 2022
It gnaws and it ravishes
it consumes in it’s selfish greed
it laughed in your face
and it pecked away at my seeds

It was the water beneath the surface
that ensured that we would inevitably rust
it was the fuel on the fire
that eventually would burn away your trust

And just like my Father
I was unnecessarily mean
repeating the cycle of abuse 
destroying what was once evergreen
237 · Nov 2016
Tracing
Thomas Alan Nov 2016
Tracing fingers
obliged to stroke a map
float across a pond
and dance with just a tap
lands of promise
and secrets yet to see
take us to the places
that they said I'd never see
236 · Apr 2016
A Deeper Connection
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
It does not matter
What is under your vest
But what's inside your heart
Not what's bulking your chest

You see that's the problem
With the laws of attraction
Laws can broken
By a deeper connection
235 · Nov 2015
Winter
Thomas Alan Nov 2015
When you left
I felt numb
then it hit me
and it feels like winter
all over again
234 · Jan 2016
a kiss
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
running like water
a call at the the lips
love locked in
air tight
a kiss
231 · Jan 2016
Intact
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
I cannot replace
what I lost in you
but watch me now
that I'm not with you
230 · Nov 2015
My Garden
Thomas Alan Nov 2015
My garden                
is filled with flowers
flowers and **thorns
229 · Jan 2016
In time
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
time
is mother nature’s sewing machine
and it will fix you
right up
228 · Sep 2016
Bend
Thomas Alan Sep 2016
You shy from the truth
that brings us to our end
That it slowly is upon us
but the time we can bend
227 · Nov 2016
here all along
Thomas Alan Nov 2016
you know that
when we are folded
well into the night
your arms
and your body
are like the warmth of a summer
long overdue
but after a lifetime of winter
i did not know
that even in the winter
the sun
was here all along
226 · Jan 2016
Wandering
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
When I was misguided
alone in the night
I was wandering slowly
lost out of sight
225 · Oct 2022
goodnight from me
Thomas Alan Oct 2022
i am so easily hurt
so easily hurt
and my time draws closer
it’s like a flame to a bedsheet
i will go up in the night  
and finally i will sleep
because i have a lifetime of tiredness
but the tears i cried will never put out the flame
and so whether it’s a bedside of pills
or a swinging from a tree
i am sorry for what i did to you
and i am sorry for me
but it’s goodnight for you and us
and it’s goodnight from me
224 · Sep 2016
A never ending story
Thomas Alan Sep 2016
Once tied to the lining
of a never ending story
and now pinned to the fabrics
of "you have to leave in the morning"
224 · Apr 2016
Know when to run
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
I'm still falling
from when I hit the wall
My lifeless body
had forbid me to crawl
Still quite the punchbag
but not quite the son
Taught the lesson
to know when to run
222 · Jul 2016
Betrayal
Thomas Alan Jul 2016
coiled there beneath a smile
draped in the betrayal of white wine
beneath the blanket of another lover
that's where you'll find what is mine

if i had poured a glass of red
perhaps i'd not have shared my bed
so 3 more years can hit the clock
and we can watch it
tick
tick
tock
222 · May 2016
The Wood
Thomas Alan May 2016
I remember the mornings
the smell of the grass
the gold of the fields
but not where I'd rest

I found myself
in the green of the wood
back when I was innocent
**all innocent and good
220 · Apr 2016
The Things I've Seen
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
If you could see
The things that I've seen
Then you'd never feel
Entirely clean

And if you could feel
The things I've felt
You'd also have a heart
That would not melt
216 · Jan 2016
Watching The Clock
Thomas Alan Jan 2016
Please go harder
        Now faster
Then stop
If only enough time
    To keep our eyes
        On the clock
216 · Jul 2016
A Hundred
Thomas Alan Jul 2016
I met you at one
when you poured me some wine.
You followed me to bed
and you made yourself mine.

A hand placed on your knee,
ran a shiver up your spine.
You're doing over a hundred,
but you can't go back in time.
215 · Sep 2016
December 25th
Thomas Alan Sep 2016
On December 25th
there's a silence in your head
Memories of me distant
and by summer will be dead

You will see my face in lights
that dangle in the street
But the winter sings a lone song
with the snow around your feet

The scent of Christmas wakens
every fibre of your being
And I'll be the long forgotten gift
that you will not be seeing
215 · Mar 2016
I don't need to feel
Thomas Alan Mar 2016
Take me back to the lights
To a city that is old
Where I can endlessly wander
Streets laden with gold

I belong to nobody
No one but the night
That's where I fly
Fly high, like a kite

I don't need to feel
To feel I'm alive
I feel the life burning;
Burning inside
211 · Aug 2016
Poet
Thomas Alan Aug 2016
He ran with his head
and tripped over his words
               a sleeping poet
with nothing but his thoughts
211 · Aug 2016
Another Lover
Thomas Alan Aug 2016
go find another lover
you can take him to the stars tonight
he can push you against the car
but he won't hold you as tight  

and he can tell you things
that will help you forget
but what you will find in the sky
is my name and regret
211 · Apr 2016
Keep it at it's close
Thomas Alan Apr 2016
I bend at all your ridges
And you fit at all my seams
        You're lay right there beside him
But it's me that's in your dreams

        It's becoming quite so apparent
That you belong with me
But the problem with this story
        Is that it has it's folds
So let's just keep our distance
To keep it at it's close
209 · Aug 2016
Smart
Thomas Alan Aug 2016
I stand against the bar
Where I'm collecting all our dust
Our goodbye's long forgotten
But remain here I must

Strumming at the chords
Of my over-aged heart
You'll find me beneath the orange palm tree's
Where you said I looked smart
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