They say it's a free world and I have the freedom to speak my mind.
I see people on television recanting their lines, reporter's at the door and offenders peeping through the blinds.

If speech is free then why do I have to pay?
When someone takes offense to the words I say.

Now this doesn't sound like freedom to me....more like selective or should I say controlled

shutting my voice down like a person on hold....

When I say what I feel, it becomes a problem.  
Funny thing is......resigning or being fired appears to solve them.

Why is it insubordination when i'm using my right that is freely given.....not by man, but the One who has risen.

Although, they are free to say whatever they please.....
meanwhile...am I really supposed to smile and say "cheese?" ......when I feel like spewing a few obscenities.

I've been given a write up and I have a meeting with H.R.....
They are only referred to by letters because no one knows who they are.

My Facebook has offended many and my Twitter too.....let's not mention Tumblr ....that's a bit much to chew...

Where the Hell is the freedom of speech I'm entitled to?

No freedom online, offline, not even while I'm standing in line.
Some female telling me off because I said something about her behind.

She was fine, but had on see through .....I'm checking her out...because you know how guys do.

Now my freedom of speech is put on delay, because I can't express what my mind really wants to say:

Lovely lady your looking good with more cake than a baker, skin brown like bronze....precious for sure....I don't mind your company...I'm not expecting anything more.  You display a touch of cool....thumbs up like the Fonz.....

I want to take you home and shine you up like chrome.  I'm on my Macaulay Caulkin....I have you home alone.

The teller says "Hello sir and is that all?" snapped out of my fantasy and sadly disgusted.

When they say freedom of speech those words can't be trusted.

I've learned that nothing is free when it comes to man....although freedom can be purchased, so allow the money to secretly fall into my hands.

"Freedom of speech.....It's not really free at all."

It engulfs me even though it has no hands.....at times it's like a person that's claustrophobic.  Although, I'm dying to break free.

Haunting me like a secret that shouldn't be told......blackmailing me until I'm really old.

Fear of heights....fear of success.... Fear of going back to school....fear of being called a nerd....although I think I'm kind of cool. Fear of what people will say....fear of standing in front of a crowd....fear of rejection....fear that the finance company has my car up for repossession.

I'm tired of fear.....so we are about to part ways.  I have things I want to achieve in my upcoming days.

Faith pays .....so fear you have to go.  I don't care how you do it....take the stairs or I can toss you out the window.

You have no place in my life.....you only hold me back.....this isn't a required course....so I refuse to purchase tickets to ride on this track.

Goodbye fear....it wasn't good knowing you.....but it does feel good seeing you leave.  I'm now the masked magician.....watch me pull another trick out of my sleeve.

Abra cadabra....hocus pocus.....read these words and maintain your focus....these words that I write are medicinal.....take two after you eat and then say goodnight.

The next day you will be refreshed and renewed....just from reading a few enlightening words.....from some poetic dude.....

Fear is the absence of faith. What is your greatest fear?
Once your fear is replaced with faith.......the obstacles that stand in your way.....will begin to fall like leaves.

Goodbye fear.

We use them so often.....and I believe at times without thought.
You can't return them like an unwanted gift that someone else has bought.

They don't linger in the air like a bird who hovers up above....
The heart is often damaged by words that are supposedly uttered out of love.

Kids getting called names at school and nobody knows the hurt that resides inside.
This has been going on for a few years.....a pleasant school year reduced to tears.

You're too skinny....you're too fat.....you know that those shoes don't go with that....
Hey everyone! Did you know (insert name here) mom is addicted to crack?
She makes her living by laying on her back.....I think that was her underneath the bleachers at the city's racetrack.

Your lips are too big....that's not even your real hair....listen as the insults continue to pollute the air.
The negative atmosphere effects the attitude of anyone that steps in.....
How can I win?.......if the words said are defeating......it's like trying to put on weight....but you aren't even eating.

The pressure is steady building.....like soda in a can.  The emotions have been shaken up ......and eventually it will explode.
The adults who were oblivious to the situation or just brushed it under the rug when they were told.......

Have encountered a horrible situation.......something from the words uttered is about to unfold.

The room of a victim of unkind words and horrendous names.....decided to play a Russian roulette game.....written on the mirror and bullet:

"sticks and stones may break my bones....but names will never hurt me.
THAT'S A LIE! THEY DO! NOW LOOK AT THE PAIN I JUST BROUGHT YOU!"

No one listened as the individual went through a silent Hell........along with the thoughts that began to take life.....they began to feel that maybe their tormenter was right.

They decided to become the judge and jury.....and cut off the lights.

Father....please help those of us who fail to display empathy.  We are so judgemental ....even though you have told us not to be.  Forgive us Lord....and give us to encourage each other......not tear down each other.  We all have to live together.......Amen.

Words.....use with caution or think before you speak.

There once was a butterfly being chased by a man with a net.
He would try many tricks to get as close as he could get.

He left out her favorite food and plants, but he could never hold her in his hands.  Instead he inherited a family of ants.

One day he caught her as she landed on a leaf.
Her colors were magnificent as he admired her in disbelief.

The wait was now over, but soon he began to see that the beautiful butterfly was not very happy.

She moved from one plant to another searching for the perfect meal to eat.

The collector placed another butterfly in this house of which he had quite a few....
Now this butterfly was different because of it's hue.
The moment it spotted Madame Butterfly its wings became heavy and turned a shade of blue.

Madame Butterfly went about her business with no clue at all.....
oblivious about this suitor who sat affixed up on the wall.

He tried hard to gain her attention, but to no avail.
It was like a sailboat moving without a sail.

Eventually they became a couple, but at times she tended to take flight.
She entertained other butterflies who only moved their wings at night.

He chased her many times.....only for her to flee again.
This arrangement wasn't working for him, so it had to come to an end.

Heartbroken he watched the one he grew to love mill about aimlessly in the air.
Madame Butterfly's attention captured by one who didn't care.

The collector observed the behavior of the two and from his research picked up this clue.

Butterfly females are similar to humans before they commit, they often run from the one who truly loves them.

Butterfly females are just like humans too.....
They often run away from the love that has been proven to be true.

Which butterfly are you?

The seed had been planted long ago.  The words had been prophesied to give life.  
I'm making deliveries, although I'm not a midwife.

These words are a key to unlock the invisible bars for those who have lost their voice......due to a bad choice.

He observed her movements, like a lion that stalks its prey.
She found him to be quite handsome when he spoke to her that day.

She had been praying the her loneliness would soon come to an end.  The third wheel activities needed to come to an end.

He wasn't a big time star....just a regular dude.  His mother instilled manners ....so he made it a point not to be rude......
He was well aware of the female's who thought that men only wanted to see them ****.

Although, he had to admit there was some truth to this myth.  There was something about this woman ......that had him in awe.

She was a Michelangelo type woman.....rare and precious.  He didn't have any crafty lines....so he didn't know how to catch this.

Opportunity that he knew would only come once.  He had read about the Proverbs 31 woman and wondered if she could be.
The addition to eventually make three.

How did he jump so far along in his thoughts?
Just married a woman and had a family......

All this from watching a beautiful woman walk down the street.
Hopefully....one day he will muster up the courage eventually to speak.

The seed has been planted.....

I should have been a boxer....the way I stick and move when I write.  The only person I know that can make the sun shine at night.  

I should have been a boxer....the way i fight with words to paint a picture.  I'm using the jab to set you up for the knockout blow.  I'm looking for your tendencies and when i spot it......down you will go.

I should have been a boxer....float like a butterfly sting like a bee.   A sign of honor to a fellow poet.....and inspiration to me.....Muhammad Ali. I should be a boxer the way i study my craft and observe the legends of the game.  It's all all about the passion.....I could care less about fame.

I should have been a boxer.....you can't be good unless you train.  I have my book ....my pen .....ideas in my brain.  I have so many thoughts I may need another brain.  I'm on the speed bag so my brain is quick with the flow....switching styles like a southpaw.....which way is it coming? I guess you will never know.

I should have been a boxer....because i really like to fight.  Instead of gloves I utilize my pen to pulverize the paper and annihilate those foes and lost loves....father's who left their children at start.  They couldn't finish the fight .....was he a coward or a scarecrow.....born without a heart.

I should've been a boxer.....because my defense is always up.  I hide my poems inside a book .....it's highly guarded so don't try to look.  The thoughts inside are g14 classified....so I'm hiring security guards.....if you want to gain entrance.....you must present an identification card.

I should've been a boxer....because I'm always fighting.  My thoughts are knocked to the paper and bleeds black or red.  I write about life .....because I know nothing about being dead.  Although, I been knocked around .....and have had to take a standing eight.....I leaned on the ropes and learned to wait.  Still working the jab......which are the words i write.

I should've been a boxer.....one hitter quitter and then it's time to say "Goodnight!"

Ladies and Gentlemen......we have a unanimous decision.  The new poetic champion of the worldddddd!!! ......I should've been a boxer.....Yeah right.

They say...."good things come to those that wait".....
They said "you shouldn't walk in the kitchen, while baking a cake".

They say "you shouldn't talk with your mouth full".
They also say it's rude to eat and run.

They have often said...."you can't sit too long in the sun".
They say ....you only live once and I think to myself.....how do they know?

If they never died and had family cry.....following the hearse and their family to disperse their final good byes.

They say "the good die young"....but I know people who were not so good....matter of fact.....they terrorized the whole neighborhood.

They say "you are what you eat".....and that's kind of neat.  I love shrimp.....so Bon appetite!

They say "don't drink and drive".....and I can understand why....
We have seen so many news stories.....where innocent people die.

They say "look before you leap".....and I hate suicide.....which is where people have given up hope.  

They say "it's hard to live" .....but is it easy to die?
Is it worth it .....when your abandoned child cries?

They say "**** them with kindness".  I was taught that love is kind and it conquers all.
They say that the bible was written by man. They say they don't believe the story about man's fall.  I'm not judging....it's not my call....They said it.

They say "you should call before you come", but didn't Jesus tell them he was God's Son?

They say that the old styles always come back.....there may be some truth to that.
They say "when you get married "you should have something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.

They never say "I'm going to pay off this wedding for you".

They say "good things come to those who wait".
I'm guilty of not realizing the goodness God creates and the blessings he creates.....but they say "It's fate".

They say you should " you should look both ways before you cross the street".
She wasn't paying attention ......so he was able to sweep her off her feet.

The light was green, so they were destined to meet......when the light turned yellow......I knew they had to take it slow.....Red light special...so they decided to stop.  It became official when he produced the rock.

There were no Jay-Z sightings, although they said "He was there!"
I didn't see any rock signs being thrown in the air.

They say " anyone can write a poem", so I gave them my pen.

They never said another word, but I heard they wrote a book titled "They say..."

They say " It's okay..." everybody's doing it.

They say a lot ....but at times don't say much.....They are always saying something......sometimes I wish they would just "SHUT UP!"

WHO ARE THEY?

I hold something deep inside unseen by anyone.  It's priceless to some but not to all......Satan knows about it hence the fall.

It was given to me by someone I know.  Before I received it I was pure like fresh snow.  People would smile at me and say hello.

Since it has entered my personal space ....its always on my mind....and at times I can't sleep, I toss and turn.  I need a cold shower because my insides burn.

I wish they had never given it to me at all.
I'm feeling like Cinderella before she went to the ball.  I'm all cried out and that's a fact.....

I'm going to call them up and give it back. It has become too much for me to bare....I'm worrying and losing my hair.

This is something you should never keep....especially if its potential is destroy another person....and for you to gain respect.

There are some things I never want to collect....so when they get here i'll finally repay my debt.....I have a few things that i also regret.....and i will tell them in their ears so at night they won't forget.

                       SECRETS.......anything that's done in the dark comes to light eventually.

Dear Me..... First let me say that i love you.  That's real talk.  I have nothing to gain....after all we share the same names.  I've been with you throughout the years.
I vividly remember all those tears.

The abuse and yelling and screaming and running away.  I have bad memories.... like your father dropping you over the bannister causing you to visit the hospital that day.  He was cracking jokes....while we had a hole in our head.....I recall... not so fondly the words he said "don't tell your mother....don't say a word." He had a nerve to repeat it as if I hadn't heard.

Yes...he said it was your fault...but i new better.  I wanted to give you some closure....so I'm writing you this letter.  I hear you tell the stories every now and then.....you tell it with a smile although there is pain that still resides within.

How many times did we wander the street? ...searching and begging for change .....just to get something to eat.  The one that was supposed to love you.....really didn't know how ......his father died when he was fourteen.

How could he care for you and he was only nineteen?  Then he started to hustle and bought a store......got high off his own supply .....firebombed his house.....because when the kids were younger ......he would make them cry.

I remember him saying that you wouldn't amount to much and smacking you in front of his friends for GP.......it wasn't just you.... he did it to me.  

But enough of that.....Look in the mirror and see the man I see.  Can you see those eyes? Hey ....that's me.  You have have come a long way.......abuse,cheating spouse who had a child by another.....where's Rihanna? I could use an umbrella, ellla,ellla,aye.

The divorce took a toll on us.....I'm glad you went to church.  In God we trust. Thank you for writing and saving us....you held so much in I'm surprised you didn't bust.

You have been through a lot in this life and I just want to tell you.....You are more than a conqueror and you will win.  I'm going to be by your side until the end.

I love you like I love my Son......now I want to shine like one. I'm proud of you. I want your faith to increase....greater is he that is in me..than that is in the world.

Sincerely yours......Jesus and me

Words are raining down like snowflakes....falling on your tongue like icing from a cake.  I don't bake...but i create rhymes sometimes.

Happy or sad....I love to write about love ....I try to be hard...but that's just not me.....I'm more of smooth talker.  Take my hand and come walk with me.

Can we lay in the grass and look at the clouds....and daydream about our future together out loud.  I avoid drama because that takes the attention off of you...but i wrote about Attention that was dedicated to you.

The power of words....My Word is "breathe" because God breathed in the nostril of man.....and for that reason .....I am able to caress your hand.  To kiss you ever so softly and look in your eyes.....I don't compare myself to those other guys ......because i stand alone.

I love a challenge.....and you make me work.  My mind is working overtime in an effort to impress....but my eyes are fixated by your body in that dress.

What is poetry? Poetry is the connection I have with you.  I'm the paper and you're the pen, Amen.

I learned from a teacher that  "A parent is the first one we see.  The apple falls next to the tree.

So...you continue to be on my mind even when I'm sleep.  That letter from a stalker made your heart weak.  He cut your brakes and said he was looking inside....maybe he saw you....while I gave you a ride.  The **** on my head as I tried to protect you was well worth the wait.  I glad that we could share a peaceful date....but hold up...wait!

I'll be right back.  Look up in the sky! What do you see....a poem written in the clouds all courtesy of me....your favorite superhero.  I don't go by a name....because i am free.  

Hey...I'm back ....with a few more dollars from that bank.....for some odd reason there was a hole in the  wall. A guy walked by and said he saw an advertisement on Craigslist and stated it was free....I grabbed all I could carry and said that's cool with me.

So...as we are together and the rain is money green.  I pray you understand what this poem means.  It was a paper that i found from long ago....A poem about a poem was the title.  There were severel judges and comments like American Idol....but I never had a clue.....until I read that last line.....the author was You.

The mind is a terrible thing to waste.......

My dad sleeps with A teddybear and i wonder why.  He's a construction worker and a pretty tough guy. He's a real man because I've never seen him cry.

He takes me to my games and when the cheers go up... he's always the loudest one. I was taught that winning is cool...but it's more important to have some fun.

Just me and my dad....I really love that guy. He's my hero and my star.....he said to be successful in life....You must be true to who you are.  I'm a poet/writer....but enough about me.....let's go back to my dad and his teddy.

My friend came over afterschool .....we were playing the game ....doing the things that kids do.  He said I'll be right back I'm going to the bathroom.

Upon his return his face had this worried look.  At first he tried to pass it off as a joke....but he failed the test.  It was obvious that he had something he needed to get off his chest.

On the way back downstairs I passed your father's room and I saw a disturbing sight.  I swore he was clutching a teddybear and holding it tight.....I hope he didn't let the bedbugs bite.  He began to laugh out loud....but i didn't find it funny.  I felt violated like pooh stealing the bees honey.

I tip toed up the stairs because this mission required stealth.....if my dad is awakened this may be harmful to my health.  I peeked into the room and what did i see?  Two beady black eyes with A yellow hat staring right at me.

I let out a gasp due to my surprise.....why the stuffed animal?  An answer was hard to surmise.  I retreated to the stairs and descended the steps.....it was like the walk of shame.....I'm thinking about relocating and changing my whole name.

My friend was smiling and asked "Did you see?" steady stuffing popcorn in his face while I'm dealing with a catastrophe.  A few minutes later my dad magically appears and I can only utter "Dad why?" He's looking confused as he wipes the sleep from his eyes.

The bear that you were holding in your sleep.....What's the reason for that?  You are an adult and way too old for that.  He paused for a few minutes to gather his thoughts.  The response I recieved wasn't what i thought.

Son...although its my business what i do.....I'll explain my situation to you.   Do you know what its like to sleep in your bed alone?  Your mother ....(my wife) is no longer home.  We used to be happy or so I thought .....

The woman I loved for so many years has broken my heart and reduced me to tears.  My greatest gift from her is you.  You are my inspiration and the reason I work the way I do.  I loved her ....but she never loved me.

If something doesn't want to stay.....you have to set it free.  Son...the bear became my form of relief .....it game me comfort and allowed me to sleep.  The perfume that your mother used to wear.....she sprayed the bear with it.  The fragrance reminds me of the love we used to share and......how I would tell her ....."I love you"...and gently stroked her hair.

The bear was given to me by your mother the first time we met.....as i become stronger and the hurt begins to decrease.....me and the bear will be at peace.  Son....I hope you understand that I'm still a strong man....I'm just hurting and allowing God to work his plan.

I got a clear view of my father's heart and i really no longer cared.....He had all the right in the world to sleep with a teddybear.

My imagination is yzarc or si it tusj creative?  My thoughts eavh been jump started and now the currents flowing.

The ediers to be good is not my tseuq.  Although, I wouldn't mind being one of the sebt.

My style is versatile like a blank scrabble etil or confusing......quite amusing......unassuming......Sir! Please keep it ginmov, so what more can I say?

I'm loaduning the words that have amassed  themselves in my head.  I guess this proves my thoughts are not eadd.

How can they be? If they inspire and give ifle.  I etwri from my heart and at times the words cut like a efikn.

Waiting for the next tachb to fill up, so they can be arranged and sent out.  They are later buffed and shined....put on lpdiasy.  I hope ouy are smiling because that's my morf of pay.

Dear Mr. President

This is a letter from me to you.  There are many who are displeased with you....but I'm actually quite proud of you.

  You helped the automotive industry get back on track......even though you had the naysayers upon your back.

I feel many people put too much of the blame on you.....especially when there are other's involved.  You can't achieve success alone....you need a team. Just like Dr.King.... I know you also have a dream.

I recall your visit to my state and eventually my city.  You blessed my neighborhood with your presence.  I saw people of different ethnicities standing as one.  Everyone was smiling even the sun.

You bellowed words of inspiration into the mike.  My family was gathered on the sidewalk and for once everything seemed to be alright.

I like how you are just a regular guy and love to play ball.  I admire the fact that you get to play with the superstars who will eventually enter the Hall of Fame.

  Your name has been etched in history .....I'm honored because I never thought I would see this in my lifetime.  An African American giving The State of the Union Address in primetime and granting interviews on Nightline.

I love the example of marriage and fatherhood that is on display.  It is often stated that  "we" don't commit and are dead beat dads.....from what I've witnessed you aren't doing bad.  Thank you for the positive image you have provided me.....it's a form of motivation for me.

I saw a picture where you had your feet on the desk and you were on the phone....but I knew that you were a hard worker from the hole in the bottom of your shoe.  You were about the people and walked where we lived..... not in Hollywood or Rodeo Drive with your finger in the air doing your redition of  ' Staying Alive."

Mr. President...the thing that really gets me upset....is the blatant form of disrespect.  They continue to call you by your last name....You earned the title of President yet they deliberately leave it out.  I often hear Mr. Obama or Barack.....how is this cool when you are obviously on the clock.


They showed respect to President Clinton and George Bush.....both of them even though he tried to steal a whole state....but no one will discuss that issue.....I guess I'm a few years too late.  

You are highly educated and intelligent more than the media would like to say.  I'll make sure to add you to my list of leaders when I pray.

Thank you President Obama for the example you have been.  I believe that you deserve the opportunity to do it again.

Sincerely.......a struggling poet.

The room is dark and he's sitting alone.  The light from the moon sneaked a peek inside.  He's writing something....but i can barely see.  

The blanket is so soft that's covering me.  He removed me from the closet.  I was in a box with some cards from when he was a kid.  I was actually surprised when he opened the lid.

I've been in this box for quite awhile....so I'm wondering about the occasion.
I see him lacing up his prized possessions....he also has a closet full of those.
He says he loves them and that they match his clothes.

A tear falls on to me ......and i feel the warmth of his hand.   I'm turned over and pulled back....and out jumps one of my friends.  She falls on to the bed and sticks her landing as the blanket cushions her fall.

He lays me back on the bed and searches the room for something.....I hear a click and realize that he has locked the door.  I'm trying to figure out what he has in store.

Whatever it was ....he finally found and loaded it up with her brothers.  Meanwhile...she was still there lounging on the covers.

She said...."you know what he's about to do don't you?"  I stated that I didn't have a clue.  He's about to make us become an accessory to a crime.

He's attempting to use his last life line.  The news caught me by surprise....I vowed to serve and protect .....to guard my owners house.

She said "He has tried it before ....matter of fact several times. He just never succeeds. That's why he purchased you.  He thought it was the gun ....he said it kept jamming when he pulled the trigger.


I asked her what happened...and she said "We worked together...since he's not strong enough to refrain from the voices that speak....we decided to be the strong one's since he is weak."

The safety did his part..because he thought.... he took it off...The clip decided that she didn't want to fit....she had put on a little weight. Plus she went from a size sixteen to a thirty two.  She was really upset and didn't know what to do.

My brother's and I worked with the trigger and when he stuck me to his head and closed his eyes.....all you heard was a click.  His hands were sweaty and so was his face....I guess he envisioned blood all over the place.

We had just pulled off a trick....although he tried once again. The attempt was another failure.  He will never know that we are a team and preserved his life.

We won't become an accessory and maybe he will get an opportunity to read that suicide note response....so he can see the other side of his selfish act.  This is not an opinion....what I'm stating is a fact.

I guess he's gratefulful that he's still here....I see a tear and he's on his knees.

He said "Lord please forgive me for my selfish behavior.  I just don't know what to do.  I prayed and nothing happened...so i became angry with you.

  Why...must I struggle when others have it so good?  Why did my wife leave me for another man....even after I put a diamond ring on her hand?

  Why did i suffer abuse from my dad? ....Lord, please restore the fire within me.  I'm hurting so much inside....and feel death would have been better.

That's the reason for my letter.  Lord...I hope you forgive me. Thank you Amen.

He took me apart and placed me in a bag....before he did that... he wiped me down with a rag.  The bullets were scattered all over the place....and he finally turned on the light.

Psalm 119:105
"Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path."

An excellent decision ....and another opportunity to fight.

Come with me....I promise you that I'm different than the others.  I'm not concerned about getting you under the covers. Although...I am trying to get to the level of meeting your mother.

At dinner....without a doubt i'm pulling out your chair.....whispering sweet nothings in your ear and playing in your hair.

Time seems to stop when i'm with you...so I purchased the clock and placed it upon your arm.  Now times revolves around you.

You make my sun rise.....and my inner star shine. I have a question ....I would like to ask you though....

Would you be mine? I'm on bended knee ....waiting to set you free.  Free from being single and sleepless nights....loneliness and meaningless *** ,and waiting for that late night text....allow me the privilege of treating you right.

As I sit here and look into your eyes.....there is no doubt in my mind that I am the right guy.  

Laid back, cool....drama free... diamonds are a girl's best friend.....so I made the ring a key.  My question is.....

Will you marry me?

We took an impromptu trip to where you can have fun when it's real late. You don't have to leave the building ....but you can still get a date.

The lights are dim and there's a few flatscreens on the wall.  The barmaids are looking good and serving up the drinks. The music is pounding shaking the floor.....dollars are being thrown and the girls are looking for more.

The bottles are popping in VIP.....I'm just enjoying the eye candy that I see.
She approaches me from the rear and rubs her hand across my chest.  She says "You feel kind of tight....you must be stressed."

A slow song plays in the background .....and she begins to dance like a king cobra.  The only difference is that I wasn't afraid to hold her.  I pull her close and rub her like Aladdin's lamp.  My intentions are to make her damp.

We are transposed to a place where we are all alone....I whisper in her ear some sultry adjectives and verbs.....and her response are faint whispers...muffled words.  Syllables spoken,but nothing heard.

She grabs my hands and leads me around her temple. She takes my hand and makes me massage her *******.....and runs my hand down her legs.  Her attempt to make me beg for more.....and to get me on the other side of the door where I could pay to play.

She whispers in my ear that she is getting moist down below.  The question is if i want to continue the show.  The dance continues and she stops grinding on my *******.  Her eyes lock on me and she places the most seductive kiss upon my lips....

You are not like the other men who view me as a passing ship.  They want to slip their hands and money in my thong like they are paying a fare.

When they get off ....I'm just sitting there....waiting for the next one to come along.  I'm glad that you treat me with decency and respect.

She placed a kiss upon my neck........and said thank you and took her place on deck......the d.j. introduced her

Coming to the stage ......our featured dancer of the evening "Destiny".
She began to work the pole after she wiped it down.  I finished my drink and gave her one last look.....and made my way back uptown.

I thought about destiny on my way back home.......and smiled when she sent this text to my phone......"Since you left I feel all alone....I can't wait to lay next to you when I get home." "I Love you."

I'm your private dancer...I dance for your money. I'll do whatever you want me to do.

The lights are out ......and the clouds sail past the window.
I can't wait until naptime is done....I want to play with my friends and have some fun.

I see the other kids and they fall off one by one....like a set of dominoes set up by a magician.  I'm laying on my back staring at the ceiling .....the teacher comes to my cot and asks me how I am feeling.

I said "I'm not sleepy", and he says "you should try".  Close your eyes and you will fall asleep....if that doesn't work ....try counting sheep.

I still couldn't sleep and was just laying there....the other children were all sleep now....and he returned to me.

He kneeled next to my cot and said "maybe this will help you sleep".  
The teacher unzipped my pants and pulled out my little meat.

The feeling that I received felt really good and I did go to sleep.

This happened two more times during the week......I never told anyone ....because I didn't know.
All I knew is that it made me feel good and I was able to sleep....he wasn't a teacher. This man was a creep.

He preyed on a child who didn't have a clue.  

I was abused at home...so I never said anything about what happened at school.  This was the place where I was allowed to have fun.....and wasn't confined to a room with a lock.  Instead of watching television I was learning how to block.....but I was always accused of flopping.

I've seen stars many times...and I've never been to outer space.  Those views came from several slaps across the face.  The memories don't produce any smiles....they just gave me a blueprint on how not to raise a child.

I didn't have any toys....or a bed.  I was a prisoner in a room that was blue......it's crazy that I like that hue.  My room was ***** trapped with pieces of thread....to see if I had been out....and I was smart .....so he put on a latch....he became mad because I learned how to take it off and put it back.

  He eventually installed a lock with a key.  If you have to use the bathroom ....you have to ask me.  Wow...you are my father not a sheriff or a deputy.

My father was on drugs and beat me like a stranger.  I felt school was the lesser of the dangers.  I'm a product of abuse and I sit here and write.

I'm realizing that Jesus helped me win the fight.  How you may ask did he help me win? I'm learning about this word called Sin.  When the teacher abused me .....he planted the seed of lust.

The enemy attacks when you are young.  His job is to steal, **** and destroy.  I was supposed to be dead....not helping other abused boys.

I now work with childeren who suffered from similar situations....and I say to them......allow school to be a vacation.....away from the abuse and cursing.  I'm rebuilding their self esteem and allowing them to dream about a different life.

I tell them that my life was also filled with strife.  The children with father's who seldom bother.....are the one's that break my heart.  My dad wasn't around....but God provided me with another start.  

I survived the tests and now I have a testimony.....To help those who are abused and lonely.  I've been on that street and I have ran away on several occasions.....

I almost died...but that's another story.  I'm just getting some answers about who I am......and why I make the decisions I do.  I just shared a real deep piece of my life story with you.

The reason.....God told me to.


Help prevent child abuse.....save a few lives

A desire for something that I had been thinking about for quite sometime.
Only to be put on the backburner.....due to not having time.

The thought bombarded me day by day......whispering for me to decrease the delay.
I had some errands to run and picked up a few things for dinner.

I stop at the aisle and hear you whisper my name.  I come over cautiously at first. This is not where I'm supposed to be.

Although...your sweetness and ingredients continued calling me.  I picked you up and we walked to the line together.....the thought of us hooking up later made my mood a whole lot better.

Upon arriving at my home....I removed you from your place of rest.....there are others present....but you will get the honor first.

An oatmeal raisin cookie and milk has satisfied my desire and quenched my thirst.
My inner cookie monster satisfied his need......"Me want cookie!"

So...that's how the story ends. A trip to the market to satisfy an unseen friend.

Can i talk to you? I have few things i'd like to say.   The words that you hear have not been rehearsed or prepared for me.  The emotion and thoughts are all courtesy of me.

I've had a crush on you for quite some time.....although I knew your heart would never be mine.  You were my Wonder Woman and i wanted to see you fly......not the way you slid across the floor when he punched you in the eye.

I became so upset ....I asked you what you were going to do.  You said " He was just playing....You know how you guys do." A look of confusion covered my face like a halloween mask......my question was this" what do you mean?"

You stated that you loved him with every fiber of your being.  Did the neighbors tell you about the new woman he's been seeing?  Now....you're fumbling around in your purse .....stating that you are looking for a mint.
The evidence collected means you don't need a hint.

Listen....I've envisioned giving you a full body massage as you arrive home from work.  The candles would be lit....soft music and wine.  The meal would be served at ten fifty nine.  I'll need that extra minute to carry you down the steps.......

I pull out your chair and admire your beauty as you sit down.  My mind is steady asking one question......how did you end marrying this clown?

He's four foot eleven and needs books when he drives......when you first talked to him online he said he was six foot nine.  A relationship built upon lies......now tears run down those beautiful eyes.

I saw the wedding picture.....and it looks like you are happy, but not actually.  The photo would be so much happier if it was just you and me.  I wish I could tell you how I really feel.  I'll just keep it my journal .....because daydreams and fantasies no one can steal.

I haven't stopped hoping........that you'll understand the way that i feel.

I can't believe you settled and you never had a clue.  I have loved you for quite sometime and even purchased a shiny thing.......in hopes that things wouldn't go through......

P.S.......I Love You.   Although you will never get to see this........Congratulations on your marriage

As the colors blend on this paper I begin to see that this work is an original just like me.

A duplicate you'll never find.  This design is from my mind.  

The colors are different and they add their own flavor.  Red's not hating because black has become his neighbor.

Yellow is aged and her clothes are falling apart.  I grab some clear tape to help her out and then I can finish my piece of art.


Purple is having a hard time as of late.  The job she has she doesn't like because the pay's not so great.

Brown is so good to her boss and has begged for a raise.  He sent
her a stained memo that said " I'm working on your situation. It should be rectified one of these days."  Mr. Brown

I keep my eye on green because he's always watching me and my homies.  I heard him mumble something about the other colors I hang with.  He said they were phonies.

White talked to Orange the other day and she didn't have a clue.....that Orange had been fired from her job and now Orange is feeling blue.

They all used to live in a box.....until I dumped them on the table.  The crayons rolled and scattered relieved to see the light of day.  They were glad to be free of a box that didn't have cable.

No matter what our differences are and the problems we go through.....when we work together .....we make gray skies blue.

We can make grown ups small and children grow.  Your imagination is allowed free reign.  Now in which direction will you go?

Marriage: A close intimate union.

The days of dreaming are over because that day is here.
We are about to become witnesses to the words that we hear.

The two will become one, Fire and Desire.....Rick James and Teena Marie.
My desire is for you to finally become Mrs. B.

A picture of beauty in your wedding gown.

The groom is looking like he just stepped off the cover of G.Q.
Somebody go get the Four Weddings crew.

Royalty has just touched down.

This is how it is supposed to be...
The tears break formation and begin to run as I watch you come to meet me....on the moon.

We enter this kingdom together, but it's more than just two.
The covenant becomes final when we both say "I do."

Words have the power to make two become one.
You'll realize this when you sit and watch the sun kiss the horizon.

After the ceremony and honeymoon is when the marriage really starts.

The manual has changed....so now there is a new set of directions.
Please grab the updated version and become familiar with the selections.

Words can become weapons, so before they depart.....
Remember God didn't create people with bulletproof hearts.

Let these words become a source of inspiration and allow the power they provide to be a source of motivation.

I won't confirm or deny that I'm in a league of my own. Trapping these thoughts and neatly arranging them on the paper....or screen.  Regardless you know what I mean.

I won't confirm or deny that this is something I love to do.....it's better than keeping track of all those kids that live in a shoe.  The mother she used to be fine.....until her husband introduced her that bottle of wine.

I won't confirm or deny that she came down to my place.  She was mumbling some jibberish and I kindly asked her to step out of my face.  Her eyes were bloodshot red....she began mumbling about wanting someone dead.

I asked her nervously "Who?" She momentarily stepped out of her stupor and said "you know who!"  Now I had no clue ....just like you......I'm looking at her strangely......not knowing what to do.

She begins to cry and plops on the chair.....she utters these words and heartbreak fills the air.  Jack be nimble ...Jack be quick....Jack left me with all these kids.....He makes me sick.

I have struggled for years to raise these babies...and did all I could do.  Do you really think a mother wants their children to grow up in a shoe? I talked to my girl Ms. Muffet ....and spider is still trying to scare her away.....she said she saw Jack trying to talk to Jill.

He doesn't want to be a father.....he wants to go up the hill.  Plus, her brother Jack broke his crown....cause he was creeping with little Bo Peep.  She lost her sheep the other day.  Jack came by and wanted to play.

She lost her focus and lost her sheep....because after Jack left she fell fast asleep.  I won't confirm or deny anything I wrote here.....Hey Jack B. Nimble you better sleep with one eye open.....your wife is near.

Just a little mental exercise......

I lay here in my bed watching tv.  My mind is wandering aimlessly.

What am I going to wear for work? Man....I'm going to have to wake up extra early to iron.  My dog comes and sits next to my bed.....takes his head and moves my hand .....so it rests on his head.  He wants some attention from me.....a little love and I don't have to pay a fee.

I have work I need to finish...but I hate doing it at home.  I guess I'll stay late at work tomorrow......don't want the upcoming week to start with sorrow.  Hopefully ....I will be ahead and not behind .....I'm not a follower or standing in line.

My friend called and said her trip was fine.  I sent her a text because she was on my mind.  She called me a few hours later to say her day was fine.  She sounded very happy .....but her only bad news.....she attended an affair and brought the wrong shoes.

The people didn't care because of the light she provided.....her presence had them excited and delighted.  That's what she expressed to me...so I decided to write it.  God allowed her to make it just in time.....and her experience made it into my rhyme.

Life happenings made into a creative piece.....a tailor... carefully measuring his work.  This is custom made.....so that means it's one of a kind.  I should be sleep.....but I have too much on my mind.

Maybe I can text the sandman and have him send me a dose of sleeping sand.....it's hard to hold and seeps out of your hand.

You are getting sleepy.......very sleepy....vee...slee...py.

Zzz...zzz....Zzz....zzz

Whose job is it to make sure our kids are educated properly.
The parents are putting all the blame solely on me.

I was always told that a parent is a child's first teacher.
Although, you want to place the blame on the public school system and teachers.

Why doesn't he know how to read and tie his shoe?
But....he can unlock different levels that were unknown to you.
Nintendo's Wii, PS3 and Xbox 360 are more important to you and your children....not a lesson sent home from me.

He can count to 25.....although he doesn't recognize the numbers when he sees them.  
Parents continue to say that I don't teach enough and I don't know what I'm doing.

My response is this.....some of you ruin the children.  You want to be their friend and dress them in name brand clothes and sneaks.
Meanwhile....he doesn't recognize the seven days that create the week.

I asked him to read and he became upset and pushed his book on the floor.
He used inappropriate language and said "I don't want to be in this class anymore!

He's in seventh grade and reads on a first grade level.
So....my question is this.....is it my fault or the teachers who came before?
That he's not on grade level when he enters my door.

Homework rarely comes back when I send it home.....although he has a new iPod and an iPhone.
The interNet and social media.....has a strong hold on our youth.

The sad thing about this is......people won't admit that this has a hint of truth.
It still takes a village to raise a child....but things are not the way they used to be.....and you can't tell people about the children that live under the same roof.

We need to go back to the core principals of teaching our children. Teaching begins at home. That's where I first learned....to read and to write.

A little discipline never hurt anyone....it encourages them to learn and  to do things right.

My question to you and it's open for discussion ......
Whose job is it ?

Music reminds me of you.
The first time I saw your smile and inhaled your perfume as you walked by.
Who would have thought you would become my fantasy.  I now understand why doves cry.

If I had of known the girl next door was you......I would have sent flowers and balloons to your place.
Just to allow a smile to rent some time on your beautiful face.

Beauty is your name.....you wear the clothes and are a vision of class.
Anytime you are at an affair ......they assume you are VIP or First class.

I want to know what's on your mind......as you go about your day.  Who has your mind, body, and soul? Who keeps you warm at night....or is your bed kept cold?

Come and talk to me.....I really want to know your name.  Although, I am too shy to speak.  A portrait of beauty who resides next door.  All eyes on me as you exit out the door. Here's my chance....but what do I say? Not much because you take my breath away.

Your the only one I want to slow dance with.....I know you are not a gold digger and you won't have to shed any tears.  I'm all you need to get by.....and I'll get the keys from Marvin's Room.

Music reminds me of you

A house is not a home if you are not there....my imagination roams freely and there we are one.  We lived happily ever after and you gave birth to a son.

Don't wake me I'm dreaming.......I had a taste  of Brown sugar and I just couldn't get enough.

Music reminds me of you.....please refill my cup.

I'm pouring out my thoughts on to this paper.....letting my mind free for the next caper.

I've been a superhero and a lovesick man.  A few stories about putting a ring on that special woman's hand.

A story about suicide and my last ride....sound similar.....but they are not the same.....different car same lane.

Will eyes ever see this creation by me? When I look at my comments.....it says none......I'm not Drake so I'm not on one.

I guess I didn't move the crowd with my words.....if I read it to the masses would I even be heard.  It's absurd that my fellow poets just don't know......they are the gasoline that helps me go......and when I blow it will be because of the fire they ignited and kept lit......

all because they didn't consider it robbery to read my ****.  I apologize for that last line... but it went with the flow.....I just get frustrated when people don't leave a kind or even a bad word.......especially when I drop a piece that I think is great and I really do.....when I create it......it's definitely for me.....but I share it first with you....

The first eyes to see my baby....but you act like she's ugly .....looking at her face....and retreating in disgrace.

I guess you never met a poet who was poor ....but had expensive taste.  That's why my pen stays attached to my waist.....

I wrote this poem sitting in my car after I got off of work and now I'm in the parking lot.  TheTeacher penning jewels and looking to hit that jackpot......

Comments raining when I hit.......I quit! Take this pen and shove it!

Your voice is something that has me in a trance.
I'm the snake in the basket .....now watch me dance.

It's been said that music calms the savage beast....well the sound of your voice provides me with a inner peace.

The day has been hectic .....people with mean faces and gripes.
This is supposed to be The City of Brotherly Love.....but some are not so polite.

It seems everyone becomes a little bit nicer .....once day turns to night.
The alcohol starts flowing and the girls are looking right.  The guys are in a huddle like a pack of wolves....admiring a female who is modeling her curves in a selection that's tight.

The music is blaring from the speakers and girls are dancing with each other. A brother attempts to dance with one and leaves the floor with her crew ......she said "We are not dancing anymore....we we were just having fun."

It's a long walk back to the bar....it feels like slow motion.  You replay the interaction several times like a referee under the hood... but this call won't be reversed.....a few more drinks and your heart is coasting......now you are a tad bit enibriated from too much toasting.

Inappropriate comments on Twitter and Facebook......but you continue posting.

When I end the night ....I come home to you.  You make my day worth living.  Before I go to sleep can you sing to me?

The day was tough...my friend embarrassed themselves....it was so bad I really wanted to yell.

I just took sometime and remembered your voice .....the words turned into musical notes as they left your lips. I'm no longer present.....my mind is taking trips....I don't reside in one.....I have many different zips.

So before you ever decide to quit....Can you please .....sing for me?
The beast that resides inside....told me to ask you.

Thinking about sleep because of the title....sorry you have been misled.  This poem is about sand and how easily it slips through your hands.

It doesn't matter how tight you squeeze .....it always slips away.  The hour glass with the coke bottle figure has used it to count time.  Walking on the beach and it covers my toes.....captivating my thoughts and inspiring me to write.......a beautiful piece about you as I lay in glow of the moonlight.

When I come home .....it's everywhere. In my shoes...and my socks......I feel like Spiderman.....I have sand all over me!  

I take a shower and a trail of sand follows me to my bed......I guess I'm the sandman......I fall fast asleep as soon as the pillow touches my head.

Goodnight.......

Come on over and sit right down
The storyteller has come to town.

So many stories I have acquired and that's a fact....I keep them hidden in my knapsack in a book that's white and black.

This a story about you.......It was a day just like this .....a total stranger came to offer you A gift.

It was wrapped in the most beautiful paper one has ever seen.  The workmanship was awesome.....some would say prestine.

He leaned on his cane .....due to a bad leg.  He hurt it one night wrestling until the early morn......he also received a gift like a mother who cuddles her newborn.

So ....as he leaned upon the cane and lit his corncob pipe ....and blew smoke in the air.  The extravagant gift was placed on the chair.

He said "This gift that is contained in this box is something that everyone wants." " You have have been chosen to receive this gift." "You don't have to take it.....you can give it to another.....if you chose.  Although....it wouldn't be wise to make such a move."

The gift is still sitting in that chair......should I open it or leave it there?

A potential to change my life and end the strife I face on a daily basis.  This isn't a deserted scene where you will see a thirst quenching oasis.

My basis for this story is about choices.....you have so many voices guiding your every thought......sometimes we chose wisely......and other times not so much.

These are the occasions when we lose touch or sight between right or wrong......the consequences for that wrong selection.......will have me singing a sad song.

If I chose wisely the day will be a lot easier to travel...not a perfect ride.....but I will arrive with all my bags in tow.

Chose wisely ........

So....he gathered his belongings and blew a smoke ring in the air.......and hobbled off into the distance.  He hummed a jovial tune and yelled back that he would return soon.

The Storyteller...........

Late night dedications from you to me.
Writing you letters to see if you are holding it down for me.

Collect calls from me to you and some steamy conversation...
when your family inquires about my whereabouts....you say I'm on vacation.

Your image in my head is what makes each day easier to bare.
I'm writing and doing this time instead of stressing and pulling out my hair.

It's been said that you do the time and don't let the time do you.
I don't want to see the white jackets and be 302'd.

Listening to the radio as the love songs play.....
Daydreaming as I glance at the pictures of us together on Unity day.

The reason I love you is not hard to see or maybe it's just me.
My emotions run wild whenever you're next to me.

Expressing to you my visions and dreams while I'm incarcerated.
Promises that when I get out ....our lives won't be complicated.

My thoughts become hot air balloons and the English language becomes foreign.
A refugee in my own land except my name's not Lauryn.

Wishing I could hold you and fall into a deep sleep.
Time would stand still and nightmares would never creep.

Our love is like a mountain that has no peaks.
I'm missing you like crazy as I'm counting down the weeks.

I'm holding you hostage.  You're a prisoner without the cuffs.
You're saving yourself for me, but it's evident I'll never be worthy enough even if I was free.

The money was my idol and it came so fast.....
Partying my life away and having a blast.
I never thought about how long the money and fun would last.

My rise and fall like a pool that's been deflated.
My capture and imprisonment greatly exaggerated and celebrated.

The families that I've hurt......by them I'm hated.
I've destroyed my neighborhood.  That's what many have stated.

All this is true .....so I'm setting you free.
Consider this the last correspondence you'll ever receive from me.
Please accept this heartfelt apology.  My love I am so....so sorry.

My love has revolved around you.  My every waking thought has been about you.

Now you are telling me that you're setting me free.....
Whoa! wait a minute......How could this be?

Since we were little kids it's been me and you.
You were the paper and I was the glue.
My people said that you were not good enough for me, but I was still stuck on you.

This really hurts my heart as I read the words you've penned.
I realized not so long ago that this relationship must come to an end.
The transition will be difficult and it will take time for my heart to mend.

As I listen to the lockdown love dedications again and again.....
I'll have vivid memories of how this relationship began it end.


                                                                            4ever in my heart
                                                                                Lockdown Love

Let the tears flow and let the guns go.
  
If men start crying, we'll stop dying
and the killings in the hood would cease.
The prisons would be empty of angry men.....because they've finally found a release.

If men start crying we'll stop dying
and take our rightful place as the head.  No more negative views, news or obituaries to be read.

If men start crying we'll stop dying
and now I'm on my knees.....praying for my life, but not from a gang of thieves.

If men start crying, we'll stop dying
because we're no longer afraid......about the misconceptions about men that have been made.

If men start crying, we'll stop dying
and hiding behind this wall of pride......so much hurt inside .....I need a life preserver to prepare me for this ride.

If men start crying, we'll stop dying
A canoe full of emotions traveling to and fro, but I've held them in so long that I'm about to blow.

If men start crying, we'll stop dying
Do you know what I've been through?  It wasn't a pleasant ride...but God knew what to do.
Jesus loved the world and he cried for it too.  The Perfect one showing me exactly what to do.

If men start crying, we'll stop dying
and become the leaders that God has called us to be.  We'll be the voice of reason instead of the negative images often displayed on TV.

IF MEN START CRYING,  WE'LL STOP DYING.


John 11:35 Jesus wept.

I enter my class around eight thirty three.  The teacher gives me a stern stare.....making feel as though I shouldn't be there.  I shrug my shoulders because I fail to see....the cause of the attitude....she didn't wake up next to me.

We had a test and I tried to study .....but the book studied me. I really want a good score....but my efforts were poor.  Too busy lolly gagging and talking to my friends at the store.

I'm sitting at my desk with my notes in view.....a student walks over and pushes my things on the floor......and states " I really don't like you."
A little startled and caught off guard.....I gather my things from the floor and say "is that true?....I haven't even done anything to you."

I never liked you and today will be total hell for you.  Don't worry about the test.....worry about what I'm going to do.  He had the peanut gallery who were making comments and instigating ......anticipating the chaos that was awaiting.  Meanwhile, I'm debating my immediate situation and I'm seeking some type of instruction.

I look to the teacher and of course .....she has a blank stare and says " I didn't see nothing."  Class, quiet down and clear off your desks.  It is now time to take your highly anticipated test.  The hint of humor didn't help me a bit.  I had a body full of anger collecting and it refused to submit.

A piece of paper hit me in the head as the teacher passed out  papers in the rear of the class.  I felt the train moving fast ....and about to derail.  A delivery was about to be made. "You have mail."

I had another item hit me.....and i said to myself this is getting out of hand.  I said a silent word and breathed in some almost fresh air.  I walked out of class to calm the beast within.....knowing that it would be detrimental if i connected with his chin.

I've been bullied for the last time.....my friend once told me this" in order to gain someone's respect ....you have to disrespect them first."  I didn't understand at the time......but as I walked in the halls I reflected on that line.

I gathered myself and went back to class....of course I was in trouble for roaming the halls without a pass.  I went to my seat and proceeded to sit on a tack.....not to mention that someone also emptied out my knapsack.

He was sitting there with a smirk on his face and said "so what are you going to do?" "You're that skinny kid with a fat stomach from room 302." " That's the slow class."

I walked away with my head down....but the anger hit overflow.  He stated that my class was slow....but forgot my hands were fast.  I gave him a taste and before he even knew......his face went from red to blue.  A preschool lesson about blending colors....

I got suspended for my part in the fight.....I could've done more....but bullying just isn't right.  We never became friends ....but everyone now knew not to pick on me.....because of what my hands could do.  The skinny kid with the fat stomach from room 302.

Stop Bullying......

To whom it may concern.....

You will never see this note because you decided to take your life.
I guess you didn't consider your children and your wife.

Okay maybe you weren't married and you live on your own.....
I'm not claiming to understand.....how it feels to sit with a gun in your hand.

What i do know is this....you have effected many people with this choice you have made.  There are people crying and the question is "Why did they do this?....it wasn't their time to die."

What do I tell the kids who found you lying there?....blood splattered on the wall.  The note neatly placed on the side of the bed....your last words....I decided to end it right here...I love you all.

What kind of love is that?  I'm attending a funeral for a person i thought I knew.....evidently I didn't have a clue.  What was going on in your life that made you snap?  

I'm upset with you because you didn't say a word to me.....this could have taken a different turn.  Did you think about how difficult it will be for the children to learn?

I have them in my class...they are present in body, but their mind isn't there.
They have a far away look ....just staring into the air.  At times there are angry so they yell and curse....I had a few who did something worse.  The pictures they draw are unnerving and disturbing....and in each one .....there is always a picture of you and that gun.

I'm praying that they get the help they need....they are wounded deeply, but you can't see them bleed.  A void has been left in the family and their hearts.......you took your life before you had a chance to start.

I'm going to say something God said to me when i was thinking about taking my life....I was going through a divorce ....separated from my wife.  My daughter I was unable to see....

At my wits end I heard God say..."How can you take something that doesn't belong to you?" "I died to set you free.""Who have you died for?" "I love you." after that he said nothing more.  The voice wasn't loud it was quite low and was filled with love.

I just wanted you to know how much we are hurting....all we have are pictures and candles burning in memory of you.....I wish you were here.....and I wouldn't have to cry so much......you were so warm....but now you are cold to the touch.

I'm upset and disappointed that you took this way out instead of talking to me.....or anyone. What about your mother? She no longer has a son to call and say "hey....Mom." That's all she needed to hear....now there's only silence in her ear.....and pain in her heart.

I wish you had of considered her at the start.  Well this is the end.

Sincerely .......please sign here





A few facts about suicide:


Suicide: Intentionally taking one's own life.

Suicide Risk Factors: Major Depression ,Bipolar Disorder, Schizophrenia

A suicidal person may be dealing with stressors such as:

An impending separation or divorce.

****** identity issues.

Losing a job.

Chronic pain.

A serious illness.

Financial crisis.

A suicidal person might be feeling or thinking:

Sad, Insecure, Humiliated, Hopeless, Worthless



The World Health Organization(WHO)reports that every year, an estimated 900,000 people die by committing suicide.  This represents one death every 40 seconds.

Worldwide, suicide ranks among the three leading causes of death among those ages 15-44 years and is the 10th leading cause of death up from (11th in 2005) for all ages.

Men die much more often by means of suicide than women.

men are more likely to use violent methods

Women suffer from depression twice as much as men.  2:1 ratio is inclusive of racial, ethnic background

A woman takes her life every 90 minutes in the US....A pattern that has hel for over a hundred years.

A woman attempts suicide every 78 seconds.  Women use more fail prone methods such as overdosing on medications.


Think before you decide to die.....consider the tears that will fall from the family's eyes.

I see her often ....struggling all alone.
A diaper bag, pocketbook and the baby.
The look of distress on her face as she pushes the stroller home.

She raises her child all by herself.
Her pockets are not overflowing ....which means she's lacking wealth.

She shuffles off to work each day.
She's wondering when they will increase the dollars in her pay.

Single mom to some, Superwoman to her kids.....no regrets, it is what it is.

How I admire her strength and drive.
She's strong during the day, but at night she cries.
This is not the way it was supposed to be.
My child should be seeing double not just me.

Her mind is steady racing, but this is not a race.
The thought started here and now it's in a different place.

The sacrifices and staying up late when her child is sick.
She's snapping pictures at Christmas time as her daughter opens presents left by jolly ole Saint Nick.

She's thankful for this precious jewel that she must shape and shine.
Smiling as she puts her child to bed, because she has to be at work by nine.

There's always something to be done, so there's not much time to sit.
This is a full time job and one which she can't quit.

The cooking, the cleaning and washing clothes,
she's looking for some tissues so she can wipe a runny nose.

She thinks she's a single mom, but that's not entirely true.
The Lord is guiding and assisting ....pulling her through.

Keep your head up and don't let anyone or anything bring you down.
A queen's crown belongs on her head.....not upon the ground.

A dedication to the single mother's........Thank you for all that you do and have done.

As I went about my day.....I thought about Dr. Seuss. How much I enjoyed his rhymes and his stories in my youth.

The truth of the matter is this.....Sometimes I feel like the grinch and my heart doesn't measure above an inch.

I feel sad ...mad and blue.....and when I feel I have been disrespected...my reply is " Who are you talking to?"
I don't live in a zoo.....and never met a "who", but needed them to give me a clue?

Aachoo! Bless you! Who me? yes you.....couldn't be. Then who? Anywho....I don't like to argue and fight .....my intentions are to do what's right.

I write due to a love affair I have with words.....adjectives ....nouns and verbs.  You may call it cheating....but its not that at all.  I believe they're all beautiful ......and allow them to shine when I write about our time at the ball.

How beautiful she was standing there unassuming in a dress that was red.  I approached her from the rear of course and whispered in her ear about my horse parked outside.

I was curious to know if she wanted to ride.  Aside from her beauty her scent drove me crazy.....as it entered my system my nervous system became lazy.

I could hardly concentrate on what I should do.....instead of level ten ....my mind was on level two.  What should I do?.....my grinch like heart had gathered a spark.

As words danced around in my mind....and massaged my hardened heart .......my anger was released to create a work of art.  The feelings that were trapped inside were allowed free reign.

The substance that they contained.....revealed a man who should have gone insane.....it's plain to me .....and why wouldn't it be?.....that suddenly my mind is free......

At least for the moment......I don't like green eggs and ham....but I do enjoy money in my hand. Yes! I do.....and if I gave you a few dollars ....I'm sure you would too.

How much I enjoy when money is around....although she doesn't stay long.  As soon as Bill comes along ......she suddenly is gone.  My pockets become empty and my mood not so bright.

I feel like a jilted lover.....whose been abandoned late at night.  She never returns.....but I am able to hold her again......until Bill arrives and demands her attention again. I don't like him....he's always around like the first and fifteenth.

**** Bill is what I often say.....I'm a little Suessed out ....forgive me for my rant if you can I say.....Have you seen Thing one and Thing two?

I wonder if they can come out to play?