i am the one

the russian ****** girl
who has been calling you
quite often
late
quite often
high

i know it must have felt annoying
i do apologise

but don't you miss
my nonsense calls
sometimes?

used to say: “i can’t live without”
yet for some reason still perfectly breathing

You’d ask how many guys I’ve dated,
really wanting to know how many guys I’ve ******
...or have ****** me?

Well, anyway, it doesn’t really matter,
the point is - you're getting into numbers.

I’ll joke about how guys would multiply it
and how girls like doing it the other way around.

You’d say: "Just go ahead, I honestly don’t care."
How cute,
you're terrible at lying.

So I’ll do that, I’ll go ahead, I will divide it.
You'll smile, I will smile back
hoping you bought the number.

I see him usually 2 times a week -
He’s got a lot of work.
Or does he?
Nevertheless, it leaves me lots of time
To got to gym  
And maintain that *** he wants.
Which often makes me wonder
Whether I'll see him if I stop to squat
At all.

He calls me 'little princess' and it makes me wonder -

Is it because he sees me as a useless pretty girl or he has finally acknowledged my severe daddy issues?

(n.) an utopian concept we desperately strive to achieve but never quite get to reach

you brought to light
the very best of me
but then have killed it  
right on the spot
so now all i am left
to deal with is
my very worst