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This is an expanded version of my 2020 piece "A Ghost Story".

The Ballad of the Nell McBride (Expanded)

We all have heard the stories
Of spirit ships and ghosts
That sail upon the oceans
And up along the coasts

This tale is a whopper
And I'll not forget the day
So as God is my witness
Listen now, to what I say

We were sitting in the tavern
Telling tales of days of old
When the door, it burst wide open
And Bill came running from the cold

His face as white as ever
Like he just had seen a ghost
When we told him that we thought this
He said, "I did, just up the coast"

We laughed and ordered whiskey
To warm us up inside
"I did, by gum, I saw it—
I saw the Nell McBride"

"There's no way that you saw that boat
It's been sunk a hundred years!"
"A hundred sixty," said a voice
As we tended to our beers

"The Nell McBride was lost, boys
Late eighteen and fifty-nine
You didn't see her, Billy
She's sunk down in the brine"

"I did," said Bill, "I saw her—
I was standing on the beach
She came out of the clouds there"
"Aw, Bill... cut back on the screech"

"I haven't had a drop today
And you know, I don't tell lies
I saw the Captain up on deck
I looked right in his eyes"

The wind was really howling
We all huddled round the fire
As far-fetched as the story was
Old Bill, he was no liar

"The Nell McBride was lost at sea
All fourteen men were drowned
The ship went to the bottom
And no bodies were found"

The barkeep chirped, "We have ghosts here
I've seen a few, I swear
With all those lost at sea near here
I believe they still sail there"

We laughed at him and Billy
"Ghosts? Nope, dead is dead"
But Bill just sat there shaking
He believed the words he'd said

Now me, I was a pup then
Just a minnow, if you please
But I sat and felt my hair rise up
I'd not heard of ghosts like these

"The last time the Nell McBride
Was seen was in aught-four
Old Johnson, at the lighthouse
Said he saw that ship and more"

"They proved Old Johnson crazy
All alone out with the light
‘Twas just the moon a-playing
There was nothing there that night"

Another man chimed in then,
"Old Johnson was no loon
His diary says he saw that ship
'Twas no trick of the moon"

"Okay then boys, tomorrow
We'll meet here and head on out
We'll see the ghost ship sailing
Or we'll see that she is now't"

The wind was really whipping
It was louder than a train
Nobody made a move to leave
They feared the dark, the rain

"Ghost ships sail the waters
I believe to warn us still
I believe the Nell is out there
I believe in our boy Bill"

"There's tales of ships and mermaids
There's been sightings of great whales
Their stories, boys—just stories
They ain't nothing more than tales"

At this the wind was screaming
Like a wail now or a scream
My skin turned cold, my breath stood still—
This could only be a dream

"I remember when Mike Watson
Said he saw that woman black
Standing on her rooftop
Waiting for her man come back"

"I remember that as well," said Bill
"God, old Mike, he loved to talk
He saw her up there weeping
On the iron widow's walk"

So tomorrow it was settled
We would meet and hit the shore
We'd watch for ghostly sailors
And the Nell McBride once more

"Boys, we never made it
We don't talk about that night
See, Billy boy, he left us there
Then vanished out of sight"

"Turns out Billy Boyle
Drowned early in the day
Was it his ghost come calling?
It is not for us to say"

"Bill Boyle washed ashore, you see
Around two, cold and dead
So who it was came through that door
And said the things he said?"

There's ghosts out on the water
Like the ghostly Nell McBride
I swear and cross my heart now
But boys… you must decide

Some say she sails at moonrise
When the tide is running high
With phantom sails a-glowing
And a captain’s hollow cry

And some still hear old Billy
At the tavern, clear as glass
Recounting what he witnessed
As if time refused to pass

So if you walk the shoreline
And the sea begins to moan
Take heed, my friend, and mark my words:
You may not be alone

We all have heard the stories
Of the haunted and the drowned
Of those who sail forever
And are never homeward bound
WHISKEY WISDOM 🎵
by Roger Turner

[Verse 1]
A man is always looking
To get some free advice
So go and find the fellow
Drinking whiskey over ice
Your friends will tell you one thing
While you're both knocking back a beer
But really, I mean really
Is this the stuff you need to hear?

[Verse 2]
Find a whiskey drinker
He'll tell you how to buy a car
He'll share his whiskey wisdom
About what's a good cigar
A man who drinks good whiskey
Whether neat or over ice
Is the best one you can turn to
When you're looking for advice

[Chorus]
🎶 Whiskey wisdom, smooth and slow
Poured out quiet, like you’d know
From an old soul in a leather chair
Who’s seen it all and doesn’t care
He’s not preachin’, he’s just nice
Giving whiskey wisdom over ice 🎶

[Verse 3]
He's made it and he knows it
He's not drinking at the pub
He's sitting in a wing back
Drinking whiskey at the club
He won't talk just to hear it
No small talk or some fad
He’ll tell you straight and simple
The kind of truth that your dad had

[Chorus]
🎶 Whiskey wisdom, smooth and slow
Poured out quiet, like you’d know
From an old soul in a leather chair
Who’s seen it all and doesn’t care
He’s not preachin’, he’s just nice
Giving whiskey wisdom over ice 🎶

[Bridge]
So skip the book, forget the blog
Turn off that podcast monologue
Sit down, pour ******* right
And listen to a man who’s lived some life

[Final Chorus]
🎶 Whiskey wisdom, tried and true
It’s not just what—but how and who
From love to loss, to deals gone bad
He’ll pour it out, the good and sad
No silver spoon, just lived it twice
Giving whiskey wisdom over ice 🎶

[Outro]
So if you’re lost or need direction
Or just some straight advice
Go get yourself some answers
Sharing whiskey over ice
You can feel the bond binding
The Sisters in tune,
See familiarity
Permeating the room.
Chatter colliding
Like magpies in Spring
And the dancing of eyes
Is a wonderous thing.

Nurses together
At lunch in the sun
On a hillside Okato
Where the gossip's begun.
A unique sense of humour
Shared amongst they
Who delve, resolutely,
Into lifesaving fray.

A breed of Sisters
Who willingly give
Of themselves for others
So that others may live.

Magnificence here
As the chatter surrounds
While the old world sails on
Unaware of the Crowns...
Crowns, so deserving,
So desperately due....
To these Sisters of Mercy
Who look after you.

M@Foxglove.Taranaki.NZ
For the magnificent coterie of magpies
who gathered together, noisily, at our table this Sunday lunchtime,
All quite oblivious of the deep regard in which, each and every one of them is held by all who dwell in their, Oh so demanding, world of Professional Nursing.
For Annie, Deb, Helen and my darling Janet
All NZRN.
Gilgamesh's journey and Utnapishtim’s tale of the Great Flood

He roamed where men did not belong,
with feet made sore by right and wrong.
The lion’s pelt across his back,
his eyes were storms, his soul a crack.

Through valleys scorched and mountains numb,
through nights that made the dreamers dumb,
he came at last to darkest shore—
the gates where no man asks for more.

Two scorpion guards, with blazing breath,
who kept the path that walked with death,
let him pass—his face so worn,
they knew this king was twice reborn.

He traveled then beneath the earth,
where sun forgets and silence births.
Through twelve leagues of eternal black,
his thoughts his only turning back.

At last he came to shores of sand,
where Siduri poured with trembling hand
a cup of wine, and spoke with grace:
“Why chase the wind no man can face?”

But still he pressed beyond her plea,
and crossed the Waters of the Sea,
until he reached a quiet shore
where Utnapishtim kept the lore.

“O deathless man, I seek your gift—
to stop the tide, to make the shift.
How did you gain eternal breath,
and break the iron spine of death?”

The old one spoke: “A flood once came,
from gods enraged by human shame.
They planned to drown the world in night—
to sweep away both wrong and right.

But Ea, god of whispering streams,
warned me gently in my dreams.
He told me: build a box of wood,
to carry seed and kin and good.

And when the rains consumed the sky,
and all beneath was left to die,
my ark alone withstood the wave—
the storm became our floating grave.

For six days long, the sea held sway,
then silence fell on the seventh day.
I loosed a dove, then raven bold,
until dry land the bird foretold.

The gods repented, soothed their rage—
but time had turned a darker page.
They set me here, far from men’s breath,
a gift of life—a curse of death.”
The second to last chapter of the Akkadian 4000 year old poem, originally etched in stone in what is now called Iraq.
Translated from the original by Andrew George
and, on my request, scripted in original verse by Madam Chat GPT.

M@Foxglove.Taranaki.NZ
“When Clay Weeps”
A poetic tribute to Gilgamesh and Enkidu

Beneath a sky of burning stars,
Uruk's high walls gleamed like scars
cut into time—immense, precise—
where kings were gods, and men were dice.

Gilgamesh, carved out of storm and sun,
two-thirds divine, yet wholly undone,
bored with power, drunk on might,
wrestled shadows in the heat of night.

Then came Enkidu, beast-born and bold,
with eyes like flint and hair like mold
of forest boughs, of untouched place—
the wilderness written on his face.

They met like meteors—fierce and fast—
and fought until their rage was past.
Then, laughing, stood where blood had pooled,
and in that moment, gods were fooled.

They crossed into cedar-scented gloom,
to fell a giant, shape their doom.
And when the gods struck back with grief,
they cleaved the world with disbelief.

Enkidu’s breath fled in the dark,
his voice a ghost, his limbs grown stark.
And Gilgamesh—stone turned to skin—
sought death’s edge to pull him in.

He wandered roads where no man goes,
spoke with alewives, fought with crows,
and found the flood that washed the land,
held time’s seed in his trembling hand.

But life, a serpent, sly and thin,
stole the fruit he held within.
So he returned, not with the key,
but with the tale of what can’t be.

He carved in stone his city’s face,
a wall, a name, a time, a place.
For though we die and dust returns,
a soul may live if someone learns.
The Epic of Gilgamesh, one of the oldest surviving works of literature, is hardly easy reading. But Andrew George’s translation from the Akkadian is strikingly accessible – a meditation on power and mortality.

I enlisted the poetic talent of Chat GPT to craft a verse unclasping the essence of a small part of this 4000 year old poem from ancient Iraq.

A fascination unleashed.
Cheers M@Foxglove.Taranaki.NZ
They (and you know who I mean)
Claim (vociferously and accusatorily)
That
They (who lay their hands on and call on the Holy Spirit)
Are
Christians (funny to see that word in their lexicon).
They really do think that.
Is Christ that confusing,
Or
Is it Just Them?
Rest assured, my dear good Sir,
Your best intentions do infer
That what is natural for me
Could be, in fact, catastrophe!
That dribbling words, pedantically,
In stifled rhyme so frantically....?
Perhaps inhibits from the heart,
Perhaps detracts right from the start??
Perhaps defers the living song
Delivering what's rightly...Wrong!

If so... I humbly beg your grace
Emphatically deny deface,
Emphatically should state anew
That what's good for me's no good for you!
Tuff, but that's the way it runs
For I, friend, must stick to my guns!
Rhyme and rhythm pave my way
Without which...I would have no say.

With love...
M@Foxglove.Taranaki.NZ
My rant to Natty's "People Stop Rhyming (2013)"
Run, old man, the winter comes
Ice and snow impede,
Run, old man, impending cold
Will spur you on to speed.
Run, you fool, on brittle ice
For shattered shins to shard,
Run, old man, in howling gale
As pelting sleet hits hard.
Collect thyself O ancient one
Thy lungs have shred to bleed
Run, old man, on memories
Thy legs have turned to seed.
Remember then, in times of yore,
When muscled limbs would stride?
Alas, old man, your day is done
For physicality, died.

M@Foxglove.Taranaki.NZ
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