So long to meet this unique twist
I wish I could have known him sooner,
Being alone with him is nothing but a rumor
I want to continue with this excursion,
With him, I'm only a fresh ******
As I secretly listen to his voice,
I hear a crack of his beautiful noise  
Him and I are walking onto a masterpiece,
And he says, 'this is strictly fantasy'
This fantasy, is overflowing me, flooding my days
Angel, my twist, please never end this bliss
Keep this twisted Angel on my side
This secret love potion he slipped me is making me blind
I don't want to be healed, please, gull my heart some more
I want to play with him in this storm even more
And a gentle kiss, from this twist
I'm here at last
What a lovely, and lonely way to view
'Am I alone with you?'

they claw at the inner sides of her artificial smile
her teeth are the first to decay, put on display
that pinkish mouth
full of an orcastra of 28 filthy tooth bones
her intricate assortment of teeth have concocted an unreal tooth throne
leaving a cesspool of blood under her raw tongue
an immemorable happiness vale
these teeth composing a uneasy melody
reflecting that of a replica smile
but never grinding the ripe silence of her soul
her teeth have rotted and they are sleepwalking down her throat

I prayed for a man I've never knew existed until today
His poem made it seem like he was walking through a forest of fray
'I use to believe in God'
Was a line in one of his poems, I knew the Devil had clawed
Deeply into his heart
And planted hatred, and ripped it apart

Mad for the things that have happened to him
Mad about the things that could have been

A man who's 'hope rides on mountains'
Hope that frequently goes up and down  

I cried for this man I've never met
This man I will never forget

A man I've never met

The art of grasping madness is all I've ever known
I'm missing pieces of my bones
I must be careful what my intellect replaces them with
But I'm happy dragging my books of myths
Why do I have to replace?
Well, my ribs, there wasn't a trace
I replace them with my blood
What happens when it comes, the flood?
The blood will wash away with the water
My heart left for the slaughter
I could hear my blood, I knew I would never be free
All that was left was me
As my blood left, I could hear someone with it, bones in the left hand, and a string in right
At the end of the string was my heart, it was held tight,
all I've ever felt was fright  
This is an excursion I will never leave
Simple security I will never achieve  
As the end bears near I will show all my fear
My fear will be just as sincere as her cheer  
This was a seldom start
Nothing, could guard my heart

You are a exceedingly seldom species,
of evil and lovely

away away, to the salty sea
away away, from all that is we
away away, from men and he
away away, from love indeed

away away, at last from land
away away, even from the sand
away away, from where i can stand
away away, to the sea i am banned

away away, and now i drown
away away, i am finally crowned
away away, at last i am alone
away away, in the pits of the sea on my throne

I am the Goddess of the sea, bound in this gruesome carcass
By the one who loved me
It has and will always be, torture in these bones
Surrounded by blood, and not the blue flood
Cut off from the beautiful sea
Cut off from all that has ever truly loved me
Mastery of the sea, cannot be achieved!
Even without me, the sea, will be free
You will never tame the sea, these bones are not me
The one who loved me, the one who took me from the sea
The last thing they will ever know, is how cruel the sea can be

Doesn't anyone want a moment of silence, nothing but a blank page to hide in.
To hear nothing, not even your own breath.
To see chaos, but not hear it.
Stay locked.
Let your mind soar into oblivion.
A blank page.
For you to ***** up,
throw away.
To start over.
A blank page like this once was.
Poetry you are my blank page.

Blank page.
Find it.

I lit a candle today
Thought about how the fire is enclosed and has to stay
How the days must be long
Having to stay small, not being able to grow strong
It must loathe me
It longs to be free
It's holding in all its emotion, it's turning blue
Then I blew
It screamed no, but the deed was done
Or was it?
They both finally get to grin
They leave nothing but destruction
But yet we still light the candle like it is our everyday instruction
Me and my family are gone
The ambulance arrives at the crack of dawn
As the firemen puts out the last sliver of fire
The candle knows it will be back, and it knows many will admire
Many will smell its aroma, and think it sweet
It doesn't want to please you, it wants to beat
The fire is its right hand man
The fire is its number one fan

Candle Wax is my cover
No one can see my lover
No one can see under the wax
Until my heart beats, it cracks
Little pieces begin to fall
My skin is like a porcelain doll
Full with fear
I jump back into my lit candle and soon appear
I feel sad
But no one sees, that's the only reason I'm glad  
My heart is blurred
My heart is unheard

grasping pure, vile, blood from me
she is all i can compose
she is my mutilated melody
that i've been waiting for
an isolated life i've lived
under this disfigured cloak i call the sea
i truly fear, that she sees nothing in me
perhaps a view of a decomposer of me
nothing but a glimpse, nothing to see

i close my eyes
my favorite classical slowly fades out
my eyelids move violently
i picture myself rocking back and forth  
hands folded

as I secretly listen to the music
my hands move with the sound of the violin
my feet move with the sound of the piano
and my heart soars with the composers

i try to open my eyes
i'm not rocking
my hands are still folded, tightly, stiff it seems now
my heart is still underground

My eyes shoot open
I'm in shock, I'm frozen
I'm in the middle of the ocean

Swim keep afloat
But water is slithering into my throat
I feel like I'm going to explode
I keep getting deeper and deeper, I'm like a sinking boat

I'm at the bottom of the ocean floor
My eyes are still open my heart is still beating, I want to feel the shore


I try to swim up








But it feels like rocks are in my stomach




So I sit let the fish feed
Then I begin to bleed










I see the sharks coming
My heart is drumming
















No one could have stopped the overflow  
The only thing that exist in my heart is the ocean floor

please,
                      tell me
will your demons
       come out...
and go on their normal route.
          or...        will they play with mine
   and dine.                                    
               dine on their hosts flesh, you and i
our hearts are first, they will be fried
their mouths      water        
while we're in for the    slaughter

Since childhood I have not been as other thought I should be

My madness seems to be all they see

I take those harsh thoughts like ****** on my soul

Those people need to give back my life they stole

But as the ends bears near I shall show no fear

Their screams will be just as sincere as my cheer

While their in hell

I will be hearing the bells

While I fly away and pray

They’ll be stuck in doomsday

All my candle wax has gone down half way
In two days
When there lit I'm in such a daze

There aroma is sweet
They help me cheat
Cheat my way through life, I close my eyes under my sheet
And pretend I'm roaming the streets

Its scent intoxicates
I take the bait

Willingly
Chillingly

I'm in the world I want
Oh and trust me it taunts

I think about changing my life when I wake up
But, I know I will just closeup

In this dream land

I speak
I don't seem weak

But I come back to my senses
I throw the sheets off of me, I look around, there are my imaginary fences

I blow out my candles

I say farewell
Now back to my life, mind, that I call hell

my best friend died today

My eyelids flutter
As he says "Are you utter?"

i secretly
never look anyone straight in the eye
afraid they will find my Flaw
afraid they'll see what is inside this gruesome carcass
i am so alone
mentally  
i am precisely like a wall
frequently passed
but never really noticed
but this makes me more comfortable
i think.
and my Flaw...
i don't know what it is
i think this might be my Flaw
not knowing

She has very high walls

And they are made of sadness

What a firm foundation

What a fragile heart she has

Then she met him

His happiness made her feel something

She has only felt very few times

trust

She has very short walls

And they are made of trust

What a firm foundation

Oh and how he makes her

feel

A feel she has never felt

“I love you” he said

And what a smile came to her face

One that has never fell upon her face

What a fragile heart she has

He didn’t know any better

He couldn’t even start to comprehend

What a fragile heart she has

What a fragile heart she had

What a firm foundation

She had

You're the anchor of my soul
You're everything I long for
You're my beginning and my end
I want to hear God say "Well done, my good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of the Lord."

God you're
Awesome,
Mighty,
Holy,
Great,
My Deliver,
My Provider,
My Protector.

I pray this will not be me
"Lord, Lord, did I not prophesy by thy name, and by thy name cast out devils, and by thy name do many good works?"
"I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!"
Lord, I pray.

I'm a puppet with a missing string
The string that is gone is the one that led to my heart
Yes, past tense
That thing is a old brittle piece of history
It's not even in my vocabulary

People pity me
As if, I'm desperately lost at sea
I guess I just cannot see
See, the reason for their weeping
I have never felt more utterly free

"Always follow your heart."
The biggest lie in humanity
The emptiness and numbness
Pure bliss
There is no other way I would rather spend my eternity

Please, I plead. Eat this flesh,
for I pump dead blood.
Right down to the bone, leave nothing behind!
Oh god. Please, take this lonesome heart!
Eat my flesh! All of it!
Why do you leave this heart behind?!
This thing wasn't always mine!
Please, feast, dine!
Eat all my flesh!
Consume this heart it shouldn't be mine...
Even these scavengers, these pits of the sea
Want nothing to do, with this part of me

My own thoughts presented at the flesh steps
Shockingly frightening
Introduce to me, but not necessarily by me
But by my own familiarization
These steps are not all my own
Just momentarily
It started as a small seemingly unimportant puddle
Under my tongue
Slowly poured out on the steps
Now dampening the home
Should soon be entirely wet
Washing out all construction
The thick sensation of security
Now only a veil

I resign myself to death, simply because,
The sight of her hung over me like a revelation
The glimpse of her red, wet lips that I have obtained
Will remain in my eyes for weeks, she has possessed me
I crave her so much, that I don't exist
And with my pre-death dreams of today
I know I will only gaze upon her again,
I stare as if she is the only thing I have ever seen
Her cheeks so full of lust, they smelt of,
Crushed grass and spit, I imagined licking them
She is sooo sun kissed, sooo light and red 
The merciful sun, shined on her chest, through her dress
Through her blue eyes, making them glisten like after a good cry
This view of mine, makes my heart sore
Totally revealed, she is more than perfect, I smile,
With rotting demons behind my teeth, she will never be mine
Her tiny, pinkish mouth, her vocals that produces that lustful noise
Her giggle, any noise rattling out of her delicate throat  
That is the melody I have been mutilating
She is the only thing I hear

Sleep is my greatest misfortune,
sleep...? Is my aberrant torture
Never been consumed by something like this before
My body is at war, overwhelming gore
My eyelids are folding over my body
As I roll into my flesh bed
I'm forced into a slumber,
my eyes are obliged to unnaturally stay vexed  
I dream... or am I graveled?
My intellect is gulled, it affronts,
it soars into my heart
This is infernal, am I dreaming, or am I awake?
A vulture took my brain and put it on a stake
I took the "dream" and buried it all around
As I come back from my excursion
I am hampered, not manumitted  
I'm underground

the true joy of sorrow

As I see, I see this view
My heart has become the blue
My heart is now this, dreaded, sea
That I use to find comfort in, you see
Now my beautiful, lovely, poetic sea  
Is now the sea, I never wanted to see
You turned my heart into the sea
My once beautiful sea
Is now nothing but an endless,
Infection of me  
My heart is flooding into me
Overflowing into certain parts of my body,
Where it shouldn't be
My heart is nothing but this sea
That I never thought it could be

My mind is abusing today
Anything that anyone has said to me
Is rattling in my thoughts, it is torture
I will not leave myself alone
The words are ******* endless
So unbelievably reoccurring
I cannot cease my wounding thought process
I feel perfectly helpless, angry
I want to be ruined
I know it will make me seem better

i have gifted my anatomy with wholesome, organic nourishment
i'm left unaligned
i have gifted my form with stimulating and beneficial exertion
yet, i'm still left cognitively discontent

my ears (and my mind)
have a constant flow of incongruent content from that above
and that, simply, is my revelation

i am blessing my organs
while doing no favors to my mind (and my soul)

this became prevalent following a fresh, introduced energy
the things you read, write, listen to, and say are potent creators
no matter how health-giving you are to your physical form
the content flow is the omnipotent

A construed connection
The dampness of my soul
Glistening on his declared, steady skin
Repelling my dripping grasp
My slippery infection
Now, somehow
slithering to a ripe apifany
An intricate abnormality
That is me
A remodeled intellect, grasping for fresh ventilation
Panting in all the raw air
My  quivering inhales, so pathetic

There is something about IT
I just want to drowned in it
Darkness stirs and shakes the imagination
It twists my thoughts
they run wild
leaves me utterly motionless
I am so captivated by the darkness
It is chilling, frighting, thrilling
I, IT
will slowly slaughter me
"Let it secretly possess you." I, IT whispers
As I think I, IT escapes from reality
I let my thoughts soar
But everything comes to an end
Now, I'm back, I say farewell
"Bye, I will be back oh so soon." I... say

I hate how the darkness of the sea
Brings out the blue in your terrifying eyes
But the sea isn't made for, any other human
(but you)
You could be with me above sea
If you would only try
But your stuck in the sea, no
With the sea forevermore
So I will continue to come visit you until I die
The only thing you will ever touch isn't me
It will be, the sharpness of the sea
Your hair floats perfectly
(of course with the movement of the sea)
Sadly the sea makes you, you
You are all I ever wanted to see
(but I cannot breathe in this sea air)
So I swim away and try to remember
Your too soft, golden hair
The only time I could truly recall happiness
In your crackly, small voice is when you cried
"I'm so perfectly under, with the heavy secrets of the sea."
Now I can't even remember what you sound like
And barely what you look like
My eyes aren't made for the sea, I cannot see
******* sea! You've taken her from me!
You should have let her be! With me!
I plea, give her back at least
the slightest thought of we
Her eyes see nothing in me

10w

She's an unwanted skin tone
She's as pale as death
She will forever be alone
She knows this will be her last breath

She will soar like an eagle
She will fly high and free
She will meet and Angel
She and he will be carefree

They will make a human coveted her and he
They will make him paint paintings of their love
They will love awfully
They will love unlawfully

He is up above

He is disgusted with this perverted love
He is tired of this mess that his own Angel left
He is not going to be kind now, it's time to shove
He is doing what has to be done, many will call him a theft

But, this is what has to be done
"How can you do this to the people you have created Lord? The people you love. Send them for a eternity in Hell... To burn forever?"
Several shall ask
"You will see on judgement day, it will be here very soon." He says to himself

Joy and hope were my leaders



I can not quite fathom why God seems to let the cheaters



Win the fight



Where's my night?



My rest?



My heart feels like it's jumping out of my chest



My dreadful hearts purpose is not to pump blood through my veins



My gulled hearts only purpose is to bring me pain



You ask who my leaders are?



Well, the same as the cheaters



Lying and melancholy are my teachers

What a spell that fiend casted over me
How I would like to flee from his odd embrace
If I did he would just chase
So I choose to sit
Sit and play his little game
He is to blame
Blame for my werid love
That I shoved out
From the deepest darkest parts of my soul
His twisted ideas roll of my tongue
Like I perceived them
Like there my own
I’m warped
Please don’t think less of me
I had to work with what I had!
Now dad, please let go of me

I hope and pray as his finger brushes upon my binding  
That he will flip through my dusty brittle pages
That he will gaze upon my words and find emotion
That he will put creases in my binding because I am open and closed so much
That he will run into people and drop me on wooden floors
I long to be read
But he passes along and leaves with the infamous Edgar Allan Poe

Loneliness is like an ocean
it looks as if it could go on and on
you feel… frozen
like if you moved your skin would crack
Like if you shouted to the emptiness
It would yell back

Loneliness is like tinted glass
It looks as if everyone else sits in sunshine
While you’re in the pouring rain
Drenched in confusion and frustration
Like a broken umbrella useless
Against pouring pain

Loneliness is like... everything
Everything that exist



-- thanks for helping Jemimah --

Excuse me, I must be blunt

I've been on a hunt

At hunt for, love

I've been looking below, when I should have been looking above

Most people in this generation would be disgusted with this poem

But I know where the place is that I call home

God, you are my savior

I'm sorry for my misbehavior

You deserve  nothing but the best

You give me rest

How I love you Lord

You always leave me restored

Love has successfully hunted me down
This gruesome carcass, has found me
And It has planted this idea
I've found the monster,
behind this, repulsive idea
I have avoided it,
and surpassed it
I've cheated my way out of love
Love knows this,
now, I'm its final destination
It has shown me a path, that it knows,
I cannot resist
It gives me my most wanted, impossibility
Love, seems a beauty,
but secretly dreams of being a beast
Secretly, secretly
Love, loves in heaven, but secretly,
yearns to burn in hell
Secretly, secretly
Secretly, love rips my heart out,
and secretly, feeds it to me, secretly, secretly
Oh love seemingly seems a beauty,
but secretly, in love I am

Emotionless, you can't feel one thing
Just maybe a sting

Of the love you once new
But they ripped all of it out of your heart, it was in there hands, a particle of dust, then they blew
You just want the feeling that you once new

You know all the words but you cant hear the music

You're emotionally colorblind, you act like you have them but they never really come to pass

if I got close to people they would see who I really am
i cant let that happen
it's time to put on my mask

doubtlessly swallow the certainty that
i was nothing but necessary foundation
nothing but your essential stabilization
for your cruelly selfish character to devour
i will continue to conduct my silent sorrow
you couldn't even start to comprehend
so obviously unbeknownst to you,
that this, is the heart, that you grew  
and if you ever bother to read this,
it will still be inaudible to you
i condemn my miserable heart
for individualizing this devious,
oh so lonely creature

Dead blood pours out of me
Out of this contaminated being
That is now me
Infecting my precious sea
My stale blood ruining it
Like it ruined me
I believe it's my heart
That makes this lonesome carcass
So utterly repulsive
Or maybe I've been in this sea too long
It has eaten away at me, now I'm rotting
And there is nothing left of me to see

From the present... I fell in love.
I was off not above.
I could not love as you.
Soon... my love, would blue.
It would turn to the sea.
And that would be... be my long creed.
Pain inside me amplified by love.
Being drowned in desolation.
The only thing flooding my throat... was indeed desperation.
I unnaturally studied melancholy.
My heart was broken... from the pressure of the water.
I will never take another peaceful breath.
Love will be my death.
I quickly sink.
I'm on the brink,
Of vanity!
I've lost my in·sanity?
From the present... I fell in love.
The blue... sang its deathly, elegant tune.

As this thought was infecting my heart
'I wont want to go, but it will be time to leave
He will be in my heart, forever with me'
I crawled to the only man I will ever love again
Him in a drunken slumber oblivious to the world

This whisper is the lightest, calmest, thing I've ever spoken
Over and over, on and on, "I love you so much"
The quietest thing you have never heard
So lightly spoken that not even God could hear
But this inaudible love was heard by two persons
And two persons only, and he whispered back
"I love you" and I knew no one else could ever hear