Do you have any idea just how ordinary I am?
Do you see that you are so much more than me?
I can never be as much as you want
and you will always be more than I can have.
I am left behind and you are so far in front I cannot see you.
I am nothing that you would want
and you are everything to me.
Do not make me more than I am because
I will let you down.
I will never live up to what you perceive of me.
I'm not as amazing as you think,
I am so very less than ordinary.
I am self doubt and loss and everything tragic that is not enough.
I am so very less than ordinary,
So very nothing.
Nothing you would want.
But look at you.
Look at you all shiny and bright.
I wish so very much that I was more like you.
So shiny.
So bright.
You are beautiful...
and I am unworthy of your breath.
Your sight.
Your senses...
they would scream out in protest
if they knew how very very less than ordinary I am.
Please do not look my way.
I do not deserve to see,
to hear,
to breathe.
I wish I could wrap myself into an invisible ball
and you would forget my very existence.
It pains me to know you can see me.
That you know I am here,
existing despite your insistence
that I am something more than ordinary.
Please know that I am not.
As the sun rises and the sun sets,
as mankind is born and dies,
know that I am so very very less than ordinary,
Please don't look for me.
See only that I am not here.