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jamiah Dec 2020
in a book, this would mean something
a metaphor for loss or a symbol of death
in a book, i'd be crying and hesitant
wiping away tears and smudging lead on lamp
in a book, this would be grieving

in a book, maybe things wouldn't turn out this way
some sort of redemption arc teased and foreshadowed
a sliver of hope
in a book, people would be easy to read
two-dimensional and predictable, no room for hurt in between the lines

in a book, maybe id be tracing this in pen
cradling every memory of mine with my heart held high and no regrets
loving every second of every
moment of every
happy ending

i erase and erase itching to burn the shavings and erase again
deleting years - erase
deleting smiles - erase
deleting fans - erase
deleting nights where he was all i had

in a book, maybe i wouldn't move on so quickly
maybe i would have waited before etching over the past so fast
in this book, would book-me incinerate her erasers?
would book-me close the back cover and pick up another read?

in a book, this would mean something
but it doesn't
**yes this is about panic! at the disco; i drew his logo on my lamp a few years ago so this is 100% self-indulgent

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