"Rough", a polite way of expressing my apprehension from the start, couldn't have known I was shaking for all the wrong (Reasons) that you left are in surplus this season; flipping vowels upside down along with my smile, and faded hues stand out the most now;  this pale blue follows me but that seems so irrelevant most days. Years pass and as my eyes grow feeble, I see more, more, more, and you are the greatest beauty I have ever seen, your fragile chest and broken bones more than memories for me to launder between the parts of my brain that still give a ****. I replaced the decay of my spirit with rotted lungs, with magick however alleged, ritual a key, components fine like the filigree that lined my illusions, dramatic tone and teeth marks make me quiver, alchemical bonds between the ground and I, afire is the sky and my insides turn bone white and glowing under your moon.
Stop spinning ...
The feeling of overflowing consumes me, and abundance isn't always preferred, to tell you the truth I kind of miss all of my innards being contained within me. But each day I feel a little less invisible and it gets that much easier to deal with this (hole) thing, forget the flashing moments of misery  in which I could suffocate myself because it's hard to complain, I must admit I've created every crevice and ****** crack that you see on my body with my own devices, like trying to mold clay with scissorhands; This expulsion may be near unpalatable but it seems to me the only thing that helps me forget, truth is I don't know why I haven't yet; just chaotic noise like the raps that flowed from the lips of the artist that I wasn't paying any attention to at all that night at that coffee shop.

You are somewhere in the sky,
    I’m not even sure if you are real anymore.
         I will stay here on Earth, boiling, tossing
  Wildly under your spell, all the while.

By brush strokes, our
bones blended together in tones
of egg white and taupe.
Irreversible.

To an ancient growth, dislocated,
dead weight wrapped around my knuckle-
a promise, or a reminder of
permanence.

I am with you;
vines grasping desperately onto anything
whisper sweet things, "please
Stay."

How do I explain that
   your smile is the best
      p
         a
            r
               t
                  of me?
Living in my memory,
   it inspires the breeze
         that wakes me, light shines
            bright
               u
                  p
                     o
                         n
                              me, and I am better
                                 than I was yesterday.

I've devoured all of the parts of me
that weren't strong enough
to stand on their own,
flossing with ligaments left over
from weak muscles torn, given up,
gums bloodied by bone splinters.