Unknowing is the worst feeling you can ever have not knowing what’s going to happen the next day or further in the future.
Unknowing when you will see a person you love all so well that came from the growth of your belly.
Unknowing when that person will be free from being locked up in you mind, heart, body, and soul.
Unknowing when you will see your child from being locked up behind bars like a caged animals.
Unknowing when you will see your loved ones that gone home in the heavens above.
Unknowing how to love again once it is ripped away from you.
Unknowing when your heart will heal again from all the pain you been through.
Unknowing if you will still be alive to reconnect and make thing right.
Unknowing the unknowing is like the Pitts of hell burning day and night.
Unknowing the unknowing can make you or break but it is up to you to let the unknowing make you the strong person we are today.

I breathe every day.                                                             ­            Sometimes it hurts to breathe.                                                     Sometimes it feels good to breathe.                                                             I have a loss that I feel empty inside.                                                       As the day goes by I wonder do I want to breed or not today.                                                           But I keep breathing Knowing I will see her one day again.

Love, you can love someone so much just to them out of your life so the love turns to hate.                                                            ­             Happy, you can be the happiest person in the world that will do anything to make someone so happy but in return they take and ripe the closest thing away from you so your happiness turns to unhappiness.                                                     ­                                         The one thing that can make you so happy can be ripped away from you. So now thinks are so different cause now what you had makes  you so miserable cause all because of someone’s else’s hatred can make you so unhappy cause what you had you don’t have no more and it give the emtiness that ripped your heart out your chest and it will never be whole again. As long as you live always thinking why is this happening to me.                                                              ­              Why can’t I just die. Why am I still on earth the most unhappiest person and the one thing that can make you whole again is just a hour away but that one thing you do to get that happiness back will put you in jail the ready of my life. So why can’t I say why me.

Fighting to take that first breath when you are first born.  Fighting the good in the bed while growing up in life.
            There is so much good and pain in life as it goes on getting older and a little more wiser ever day and experiencing the worst things that happen in life also some things you don't expect to happen to you.
I think there is always someone who went through more than me and one day things are going to get better in life plus I always think that god doesn't put on us what we can not bare and what trials he does take us through will make us stronger.
I think of that saying everyday as I get older and older and one thing I hold on to is one day having all my children back in my life.
There is nothing harder than a mother not being able to be in her children life seeing them grow up and being there to help them grow up  missing all there birthday parties, holidays, and especially holding, hugging, and giving them all the kisses in the world to tell them how much you love them.
Then the tears come down your face cause you missing them so fighting to hold yourself together just to see the day when all this happens. Having the strength to keep going on fighting till the day comes just staying strong and fighting the hurt that is in your heart.