When you can't talk,
And your thoughts are your only reason
To state your sentiments,
To laugh your heart out,
To endure the pain,
Scribble your words
And feel your heart,
Draw your emotions;
It's worth the play,
Than share your part.

From dark to light,
Feelings sparked that night.
They were down,
I pretended I was a clown.

I told you I'd make you smile,
But you never let me.
Reasons were too deep
That digging won't give me a sweat.

Sweet, I thought.
If only you've done it,
As I watched the sky,
Every night as I pray.

Dates were too fast,
The melody didn't even last.
Still, I opened my senses,
To absorb what's about to flash.

Lightning in a perfect day,
My eyes couldn't resist,
Though it shows trouble
I gave it a smirk.

Seasons change, I turned 18,
I accepted rumors
Rejected facts.
Nothing stays the same.

My hands became my shield,
When I cry,
When I laugh,
When I try to end this life.

Little flames crossed my path,
Hot as a hundred degree,
Never wanted to feel it,
But they kept coming closer.

Heavy clouds are forming,
Yes! This is going to save me.
Miracle as what I expected,
Droplets avoided me.

Am I cold or warm?
Can’t answer either.
Fog covered my doorstep,
So exit was never meant to be.

World is different;
Piles of mess,
A bunch of curse,
And endless war.

Secret character,
A flirting voice,
River of tears,
Damaged soul.

Filthy hands,
With pockets full;
Broken hearts,
Misused mind.

Sinful sights,
Begging for more.
Hidden truths,
All behind that door.

She’s back in the picture.
Bothered myself for what’s on the view.
Will I be noticed with my ribbon?
Or just same black and white animation?

Penned some hurtful words,
Though I know it’s not going to help.
I scrolled the list of my what-to-do’s,
Yet unable to find something to go to.

Invisible as air,
Tried to understand to be fair,
But I know somehow,
There’s a meaning behind that vow.

If your voice could heal,
I’d pray I’ll always be there.
Imagine my anger,
I could not even sober.