Leftovers, scattered as grieving memories
Tragedy of to-be-happily-ever-after ending
When trying to hold what was once dear
The sensation now burns with apathetic melancholy

Shall I wait for you, or will you see me go
May I hold your hand, or you wish to let me fall
How long will you possess me with dichotomy
How far shall I long for the consummate singularity

Quest now halts with contemplation and questions
Blazing ardor now freezes cold with paucity of purpose
Open eyes dreams on the heat ; And what exactly is love
Trembling tears of midnight weep; And what exactly is hope

tick tock tick tock
the night ticks in its own pace
my eyes blinks in synchronization
seconds run, minutes walk and hours passes by
"tick tick tock tock " the clock now changes sound
and my eyes, i notice , are open wide!

कति मिठो अज्ञान हलचल
मन रुमलिएको कुत्कुत चन्चल
जिज्ञासु नयनका वेग्र कम्पन
तर भेतिन कतै येसलाई निस्चल

के हो यो तुफान प्रस्नको
के छ कतै मुहान उत्तरको
अज्ञानतामा रमाउने म कस्तो प्राणी
जानिन फगत भौतरिनु सिवायी

Upon the winter melancholy
Shimmers effervescent sparkles
of blue dew drops edging on grass
the sun is here. so long again

my hazy eyes had a glow, subtle
A deep inrush of woeful air
polluting my blood reached my heart
The sun once shined, so long!

the beep sounds from distant slowly fades inside my head
the box quivering with agitation gives more sound of beeps
something i never felt before hits me hard, inane race stirs up
I-
stand back, not knowing when the senses left and came back

Thrills - run wild over ups and downs of not so lovely brains
the beeps buzz around like the never end ceasing sound of 'OM'
something I never desired for me, mockingly banters around
I-
stand back, not wanting to feel the same air again and the heat

What new it possibly could fill me with when everything around is ragged and rusted;
When there is no paint to color them and there is no scrubs to clean.

What can I possibly speak on my behalf, there is nothing more I have left for explanation. Like some dementia, I circle around my own periphery to find out what could I have left behind and end up questioning all the things which were there with tags of well-accepted meanings. The meanings now slowly rises up like smokes from the chimney of the distant brick factory. It suffocates me already! yet the distance so far and it will never reach me. And I pick out my pen and start giving every subjects and objects disposed in me with the marks of asterisk. Now then, I go for the corner which I can't find anywhere because I am already floating in the space of nowhere land like a nowhere man. Just plain agitating suffocation is the feel you get in nowhere land. Blood ***** up all my stored energy to rush and cover a distance of less than one hand from heart to my brain. It fountains out through my eyes. But no reds!!! Just blue!



Let me  clear some space from the middle of everything and give a big asterisk with a big question mark '?' on its side.

The last (for today) beep sound bring me back to my senses. The message from the other corner of telecom network doesn't seem to make everything alright but I seem to collect my own image on this world.

"Maaf garnu hola tapai le samparka garnubhayeko number uthena"

I hurl my bag and zip my jacket.

Take me where you want to, take me where now I need to
Take me home or let me crawl;or just let me kiss the ground
Enough is never enough. More is less than more. take me out if you can
I-
stand back, moving just means passing out and coming back .

Let me pass or take me through. Its a cold new year day, isn't it?

Well, HAPPY New year!

Never - the love - we spoke of
Went crazy when detached from

She is the cup from which I drink the thoughts of excitement. She thrills me with her words and I go inside out with fluster. Respiration becomes mountain climbing. The easy beating heart goes on marathon. Her actions deludes me and pampers me at the same time. she was not the person I was looking for. But she has become the one that ended my pursuit. Never did she speak of love but love floods out with her every words and action. Never could I speak of love but I go baby when she is around and I go high when she speaks. She is my dope. dope..dope...!

Subtle beast within thy beauty sleeps
Your gentle smile hides the smirk beneath
Tenderly your movement blocks my wind pipe
The poison of your kiss gives me desire to live