Exhausted from slaving
Pushing
Grinding
All night

But she brings such happiness out of me
It does not even matter
I haven't slept in over 36 hours

I wish to exude a good vibe for her
Thats wrong--

I have no choice
She pulls it out of me
With her gentle focus

She brings such a smile out of me
I did not know it before

After such a day
Of stress and tension

She settles my nerves
Unknowingly

What a ******* goddess

Sitting next to her
Hours of homework

With her gentle
Fluid
Words

Such a powerful presence
for her character

I did not know

To Consider Thyself

I speak to others
        Day to day

At time considering
        At times flowing

Each different.

Why the difference?

Some flow so eternally
       Never looking back
                Always experiencing

Others are trapped in recollection
        Considering  
                Considering
                         Considering
Only experiencing
        When caught off guard
                 When they can’t consider
Foreign stimulation.

What a line. Foreign Stimulation.

Doesn’t sit well with me. Like an illusion.

Each sensation. So novel. Unexperienced. Foreign.

If everything is foreign, nothing is foreign.

Taking to the extreme incites a conclusion.
We are what we perceive.

Everything is known.

Why then, do I consider, that I consider, that I consider, that I consider…

Myself?

Allow the media distraction to take hold
Hours of poetry
And Vibrations

Settle Something

The coffee is delicious
And the oats are nutritious
(with the seeds and powders and fruit)

Searching for satiating stimulation
Somewhat consciously endless

But for now
Pleasant

As I dabble with circuits
And fluids
And heat transfer

My form of coping
So strange

To so many

But They simply confound me

Slowly proceeding toward substantial studying
Currently satiating sorrow and sadness with scores of sullen sonnets...

Surrounded and swimming with sullen others struggling

We simply cope strangely and separately

Souls distant, spread by

Separate Experience


Love and eternal life
Lost in prescribed hallucinations
By fate

Love lost in translation

Days when I feel so cold
And empty

The struggle seams selfish
But sustains

At times I need something to rely on
Something to give me hope
A warmth

Coming after winter

I can nearly envelope myself in the thought
If I let go of the moment
And give in

All of this pain and struggle
And lonesome sorrow
Leaving pits
In I

Will be justified
Perhaps Glorified
As necessity

If it prepares me for her
Only where there is pressure
And heat
Will a diamond be formed

I will be her diamond

She will dust of my
Toxic skin

Tough and calloused
From years of fighting
Transient vapors
To form

The diamond inside


I hold that warmth close to my chest
Let her love envelope my soul
And blanket me from the cold

Her smile eternal
And free

Her laugh
From deep inside her belly

A source of symmetric synthesized vibrations
No schism in her soul

My fear is that day will not come
Where I can lavishly pour my soul and energy
Into such a noble source
Of simple love

Perhaps it is not my purpose
To find love

We all manifest
To Fill a niche

But I will not forget the warmth
For Cold days will return