I’ve spent too many nights
Staying awake,
And downing every last drop
Of alcohol, this ship had to offer.
I was just trying to find something,
That made me feel okay.


That gave me the warmth that you once did.

The room was dark,
And the air,
You could feel it,
You could feel it pushing down
On your soul.

But you,
You were burning bright.
A red-hot soul.
It went so well,
With your wet, blue eyes.

My hands rested on your hips
And I looked as deep as I could
Into those stormy blue eyes,
To see if I could see the truth.

I blinked,

And now my hands are resting on this ship
And I looked as deep as I could
Into the stormy blue ocean
To see if I could find you.


To see if I could be as empty as you.

I’m on my way home
But I’m lost out at sea
I meant to be back
Months ago.
At least that’s what
I tell myself.

A sailor like me
Knows the stars
Like the back of his hand,
But I know, for me
Yeah, A sailor like me
Knows the stars
Like I knew your scars.

And *******
I knew you so well.
Tell me,
Who knew you so well.
Yeah tell me,
Did he know you so well?

I’m sorry I don’t know
How to write about love
I’m sorry I don’t know
How to write about you.
How to write about the moments
We spend watching movies
Curled up
On your bed.

I’m sorry I don’t know
How to write about falling asleep
With your head on my chest.
And your legs intertwined
With mine

I’m sorry I don’t know
How to write about you
When your beauty surpasses words

I’m sorry I don’t know
How to tell the paper
That you are my everything
That when I can sleep my mind wanders
To you and you alone

I’m sorry my poems
Are broken and dark
Strung out across the floor

I’m sorry I don’t know
How to write about love
No one ever taught me how

But I think I did okay.

This house was my heart,
And you pulled out the bricks
As fast as I could put them in.
But I got it done.
I finished the house.
And we slept in the same bed.

And I looked you in the eyes,
And spoke.
“My dear, my love, I’d give you anything”
And you closed your eyes
And drifted away.

Yeah, you drifted away.

And you tried to say, “I’m sorry.”
It didn’t make it all the way out.

My fingers shook,
And when I opened my eyes
I saw, laying before me
The man who was laying with you.

And I looked him in the eyes
And spoke
“Oh, hear me, I didn’t mean to”
So, I closed his eyes.
But he had already drifted away.

Yeah, he had already drifted away.

And I tried to say, “I’m sorry.”
But, it didn’t make it all the way out.

And I threw my **** in the bag
And left you behind
In my crumbling home.
I barely made it out the door.

I turned around, and looked you in the eyes
And whispered
“Goodbye.”
And I dropped the matchstick
And the house burst into flames.

And I tried to say, “I’m sorry.”
But I didn’t make it all the way out.

No, I didn’t make it all the way out.

When I walk through the door,
Will you recognize me?
Do you remember the way
My beard felt against your cheek?

When I walk through the door,
Will you see the same man?
The one who did everything he could
The one who still loves you.

Because, I know
I’ll still see the same woman.
The one I want to believe has no soul.
The one who took a lion upstairs.

Yeah, I know.
Even though you were lyin’.
I could see, you knew the lion.

If you haven’t noticed
I still feel the pain
And the fruit of the lotus
Can’t bring me around

But I won’t let you down.
No. I won’t.
I swear I won’t let you down.