day 44.

maybe she is breathing out

it has changed maybe it
is the extra time though
we have the same time
we always had now we

use it differently

shall i write to tell him
that things are tidier
neater that
colour creeps in
yet most of my paints
are unavailable

shall i write to ask
if all is well
or leave it all to chance?

last evening i looked at the price of wooden stilts
then ladies light bicycles
would you believe?

how things take us in this time of quiet with this
longer sentence
in all respects

i have at least another six weeks yet with recent
findings it may come longer

sunday

..day 43..

each day, each day the suns shines
and we stay at home

we plant the pots up, decide to order
more

wonder why we had a gardener now
we concentrate

that is such a thing with the hand steady
the birds singing we draw the line in one

sweep
draw the semi
circle

the halo appears
so joan will be
revered

if the pencil slips
she will remain
ignored

all around they live in groups
do you hear them chatting
laughing

here it comes quiet
concentrated

flowers and drawings
the story of joan, james

i think of those blue flowers
other than the red i draw
corona

i too have gasped
over colour unexpected

he looked older
i prefer when
the edges are slightly worn

i think it may be the weekend

(April 2020)

.day 42.

flowers are the fruit

corona

 

some years back i gagged

them speechless

scanned and photographed

them

 

now those bindings reappear

masks

controversial here

as were the bindings

back before

 

bound  words escape

masked flowers form

come free

 

things are slower now

deliberate

motion

across the page

 

graphic, the graphite is

in lockdown at the secondary

studio

so public that

it maybe done

for good

 

she thrives

no symptoms that they can see

yet the words escape disguised

 

the truth project

they know his name

41..

i dream of angel cake soft layers of colour
shop bought
like mum did

in the lockdown the law is that we must
bake it
at home

i don’t i mainly
walk and draw

as you know

the sleeve comes longer more stylist
different than the left one come too
long

i may be able to draw hands yet
like the empty sleeve better the
shape at the end

he rode  ahead on his bike
i ran to keep up the conversation
still distanced
as if i was in
training

the farmers drove by unsmiling
later down by the gate where
the ram was caught in the wire

they waved and smiled
i watched the sewing
i watched the stars
the seating all arranged

now in the corner
i listen to cohen
and the like

james

prefer fruit really
i feels happy with
it

(April 2020)

.day 40..

i hear them say that it is the solitude of lockdown
that brings these words

perhaps they are right
who knows really

there is that word again
even on my shopping card

a sticker so that i recognise that
it is not the other one though the

accounts merge into one these days

she takes it when she goes shopping
on tuesdays in the little coin purse
with the bow

it is that detail or dots which attracts me

she needed a more precise description than

buns

so i explained that not being fussy hot cross ones
teacakes or plain  will be nice
suffice
and she got extra large
some beans and tinned
peaches

left in a bag
in the shade

with the receipt
tucked neatly

you see james how deep the thoughts this
lockdown
said sarcastically
with careful spelling

i am still drawing joan now with summer attire

i am still drawing james

a longer walk to the toll along the old railway track
long gone

saw the herons balancing the tops of trees at hengwrt
skinny legs and battle cries

stood the bridge a while
remembered

(stay safe
eat your veg)

yes it is day 39.april

whatever that feels when each day is taken
at a time. each task taken in order only there
is no order
no more

we find our own routines
our tasks for each day given

i heard the cuckoo yesterday
and swallows are up on the
rise

have i mentioned that already

in the garden white blue bells
amongst the blue blue bells

while cowslips reappear early
this year

tread carefully my dears

it is hard in the narrow lane
to distance and we edged
back into the nettles no
explaination the new normal
manners

i will like to make a bench
yet have no plank around

so i made signs for the house
for the delivery men who cannot
find me

i have ordered buns and he
need to know what sort he said

i explained any buns will do
a treat
i am not fussy
though maybe those hot kissed ones will be nice

really, oh really

yesterdays reply came on the hill
and emotion took over
i blamed the wind
when i wiped my eyes
dry

(april 2020)

..it is day 38..

the numbers are not existing no more
just marks on paper and my brain explodes

we remember logarithms, sines and cosines

tables & music notes that melted away into

no understanding
whatsoever

yesterday cleared and we found a place to
read in the greenhouse
i was not prepared
not a good gardener
which means that i am not a good person
for it seems the lockdown law that all must
have plants and make fresh bread

the little house is tidy and painted now
she brought me the chair in secret now
she puts her life out there
on the ambulance so i

sit there and read
worry for her and
all the others for

all the good that worry does

later i drew all neat and precise
like as if that was important or
something
after hours
i did smudgy
and it much improved my situation

later up the house i found that we danced to the same music
yesterday



samba