I've got your dusty name written on an envelope, and a thousand notes typed out on my cellphone outlining ghosts and the feelings they emote inside my skin and bones where they've come to build a home; Tormenting the residents persistently, with their fermented love of misery. I've grown hesitant, wearing a penchant for loneliness and a cross against my chest. Could you call an exorcist to rid my mind of these pests, ethereal feelings- a constant reminder that you exist. Deep in my heart's flesh, I'm scarred by pinpricks significant enough to know that something will always be amiss.

-SLuR

The devil lies on top of my windowsill
With whispered spell. In an ensorcelling hell,
He sniffs tricks up his sleeves and his tongue has become numb
To the weeping and gnashing of his rotten teeth.
The words he speaks are only born to deceive.
He creeps into sleep inching towards my infant dreams
And takes their life from me. Hold my throat, abort my screams.
When I wake take all that I see; blind me to the truth with illusory inventions,
Fact erodes with the friction of silky fabrications. Hold me in your visions
As the phantoms sing hymns of their unholy afflictions, for eternities
I shall be trapped in his perdition.

-SLuR

Double pump,
Money shot.
Fragments caught
On eager tongue,
Put another record on.
Coffee's strong,
Something's wrong
Body's gone
And I'm alone,
Staring through
Magnetic
Windows,
That never have
Anything to show.
Emptiness,
For an empty soul.
My body's a hole
Where emotions go,
To slowly grow.
Parasites.
Disease.
Feeding on me,
Excreting
Negativity.
Rid me of these,
Useless
Necessities.

-SLuR

There once was a hero who was mute,
A musical hero, to boot!
His fingers did not strum
A guitar or tap a drum;
He saved the kingdom with a flute!

-------------------------------------------------

A soldier clouded by strife,
To have love lost like a life.
Finds beauty in flowers,
Destroys evil powers,
While wielding an oversized knife!

-------------------------------------------------

An army of soldiers well-trained,
Though, in action they seem dead-brained;
Hit with his own bomb,
That one knows your mom,
It’s a battlefield of the deranged.

-SLuR

Er.. Which is it? Monster or man?
Who cares?! He’ll slay the gorgon, ****!
His eyes cast a fierce light,
His hair scared into white,
And for the right price he wields death in his hands.

---------------------------------------------------------­--------------------------------

There’s a pink puffball with quite the appetite,
Doesn’t chew food, he inhales it with all his might.
He can’t fly very far,
So he likes to ride on stars.
Defeating evil as he goes, with every bite.

----------------------------------------------------------­-------------------------------

Test tube mutant cursed with the stupid
N. Sane in the brain, heart shot by cupid
Breaks boxes with a twist
Helpless without his sis,
Won’t stop ‘til Cortex has been uprooted.

-SLuR

Trees are beautiful dancers,
Stretching their limbs to heaven
Holding graceful poses as they sway to Mother's music.
The birds sing for them, happily.
Chirping to the earth's heartbeat
Picking their feathers clean
To fly off into the wind-
Her breath,
As She sighs with content
At all She has to behold,
At everything She has created
Like the militant insects,
Who live with purpose and reason
Who form even lines only they can see
On Her fertile dirt, they tread carefully.
The butterflies and bees and things
That feed upon Her flowering beauty
Spreading Her seed, expanding Her life,
As once again She happily sighs.
Though her happiness knows of strife,
A sour note in Her song,
A melody that came out wrong
Humanity can only carve
Uneven lines into Her heart.
Abort Her life, with hands clenching Her womb
Punishing Her for everything She has bloomed.
We don't deserve this elysian tomb
She's the one who has cursed us with our doom.
Abort Her life, so we can perish too
Her beauty turned to ugliness too soon.

-SLuR

Death denied me devastation.
Itches instilled in ivory skin,
Scratching scabs and scars.
Harshly harden this heart
Baring all, believing I belonged
Repeatedly rejected. Red rivers roar
To touch the tassels of time 'til
I'm going, going, gone...

I'll drag this smoke straight through my bones.

-SLuR

A gentle touch
That wind blows off.

A piece of dust,
A flake of rust.

A scornful lover's kiss,
Bitter and hard to miss.

A fly on a white wall,
In a room full of frogs.

A crumb, an ant
A shard of glass.

This is all that I have,
This is all that I am.

Roughly,

Nothing.

-SLuR

Why are others mouths inclined to draw the pictures I try to scribble out that form inside my mind?
A worthless, spineless creature- almost serpentine, wriggling on its belly baring cyanic, lachrymal eyes.
I want to squirm from this Stygian tomb, disenthrall my thoughts from the shadows swimming with me
inside this amniotic pool. I'm just a worthless fetus, a crumbling parasite and perhaps it becomes more
obvious when I try to keep it out of sight, like a stench you try to hide; Dulcify decomposition with a rain
of fragrant petals and slowly you'll come to find that magnolias smell of death, I can taste it
slightly on my breath and it whets their appetite, the demons that stink of ammonia that gather every
night orchestrating their symposia, their bellies full of laughter and drink while I'm full of minacious,
eternal thoughts that writhe through plumbless wrinkles and ichor, questioning motivation and what it  
is I fight for. I can never find the right answers... My tongue won't grasp the words, they just slip back into
their couthy throat where they can't be ignored; Left to die upon the shore, as fuscous waves that stain  
sand with rejection crash against my shattered form. My hands crack trying to flip the hourglass back  
and my eyes are constantly attacked by depression's thalassic pulchritude, a multitude of pains swaying
to and fro in veins, begging for escape but trying to stay encased. Life nulls and denudes, my aptitude  
for feeling- my natural ability to hold things close without unreeling heartstrings. Keep reading, there'll
be no eucatastrophe just endless pages of pointless animosity and tragedies accompanied by laugh  
tracks, everyone loves a jester with a proper act and I act a proper klutz futzing around with letters and  
spelling, trying to ensorcell any being to find my misery compelling.  

-SLuR

Foreign concepts implant themselves into grey terrain, like aliens;
Landing from a far away, vermillion planet to explore this lifeless place,
(Save for a pocketful of neurons that spend their days rubbing up against my spinal cord)
Blanketed in electricity, sparks cause reality to distort as if clouds fell apart and through the fog
Came God- to **** it. I don’t understand how we so skillfully secrete a monster in a man’s skeleton,
With his nerve endings begging to bend and touch any meagerly love, but they don’t reach far enough
So we inwardly self-destruct; leaving me so ****** that I crave cancer ‘tween my lips, even though I quit;
I want to taste you in my spit, a magical concoction of saliva, sweat and *****;
Concealment of a demon, tactical manipulation. Take my malleable form,
And stretch me out of shape; Use your destructive hands to create your image of perfection,
While I crawl like a spider with a twisted spine in our flawed perdition. Exorcise Christ,
And I’ll exercise my self-rights of freedom; where I’m permitted to be restricted by my own selfish ties.
Entwined in the unimaginable curves of Time, I’ll lay my eggs inside her and devour her line.
Dressed in sebum, I’m born a heathen; fresh out of the garden, apples clinging to my lips.
Give me a kiss soaked in the expensive blood of our sins and I’ll lie there pensive,
Holding on to extensive thoughts, herding them across wrinkles like cattle preparing for slaughter.
Breathe life into this helpless daughter, who’s bones have been hollowed by an ancestry of parasites
And she’ll hallow the saliva that sits on her sallow face as it digs into her blinded headsights.
She’s lying as a larva, trying to fly into a pupal state; her chrysalis diseased like syphilis,
Sores eat at pores and skin, inflamed, aches with itches that penetrate deep between layers of dermis
Her internal organs rot at the thought that this world is the final stop between an endless stretch
Of space and imagination; Let an extraterrestrial race escape from God’s hands through finger gaps
And find a place worthy of permanently marking where they were at.

-SLuR

Incense smoke swirling slowly, fragrance fusing fully with the way the air is waving,
Distorting distant drawn out paths of pleasant perfume,
With waving wands welded to wrists,
Reinventing the rhythmic route of roughly soft ripples,
Hazy halos hovering hastily over head,
Soon smothered in smoky, sweetly-scented silence,
Breathing breaths of bittersweet,
Inching inconspicuously into inspiration,
Vanishing behind the veil of vivid visions,
Emitting ephemeral emotions of elation.

-SLuR

Oh darling, that's such a lovely vase,
It's a waste that you keep it hidden away.
Why don't you take it out of that obscure place,
And put it by the window to catch the sun's rays?
I'll go out and buy flowers today,
To add some color to your life
That is gray.

Jesus Christ, mom!
I already told you,
It's a ****.

-SLuR

You make my skin burn, with the thought of your touch.
Your eyes traverse my body, dragging daggers across my stomach-
Down my face, carving a smile from my trembling lips.
Encased in stomach lining, worms crawl in a tangled knot
I feel like I’m decomposing, melting into a puddle of rot;
Reflecting your ethereal beauty your perfection
Projecting everything, I am not.

I dig inside your head, consuming every thought
My hands stained by your fair, skin flavored dust.
Why didn’t you come packaged with a spoon?
So, I can devour every last, hard to reach, in-the-corner
Piece of you.

-SLuR

Heart attacks, en masse
I wear a mask when I relapse-
*******! The laugh track’s scratched.
Tied a knot out of my tongue, instead of the cherry stem.




It’s so sad... how when I fall apart,
It’s like I needed that; the blowback,
From a shot through the mouth into a brainstem.
The hole that starts in my nose ‘cause I snort things that erode-
The soul, and leave my bones to hold a fetal pose.
My brain recites such delicate prose,
Whispered to me by the specter of your notes.
A voice I no longer know…




Where’d you go?
My head’s a black hole.
This grey matter’s decomposed.
I’m scared to death, talking 'bout
“Ruh-rohs” and “Hell nos!”
Trying to outrun your ghost
but, I’m stuck inside smoke Os...
Scattered across the ozone,
Riddled with “I don’t knows”

I want to exorcise my heart,
But I don’t want to be alone.

-SLuR

An angel made of unreal perfection.
A demon that curses me with rejection.
Puffy, honeyed lips that I crave more everyday.
A mouth that only spews out words of hate.
He makes me feel so warm and not alone.
You make me feel like hell is my only home.

It's always freezing cold in that hole of a soul.

When you force yourself upon me
To him, my thoughts creep
It doesn't hurt so badly
If I pretend it's his body-
His mouth absorbing my screams
His fingers clinging to me,
Digging into scarred skin.
It is never a sin;
It isn't, if it's him.

It's always freezing cold, I'm shivering in your soul.

He's an angel, eluding my prayers
While you're a devil that selfishly answers.
I want to feel the softness of his feathers
Raining down on me like kisses
A million times better,
Than all of your sorry excuses.

Your love only comes in forms of abuse
Use me, so you don't have to feel so obtuse.
Escaping you, through portals of imagination.
A face of a man who fills me with elation,
While you teach me self-hatred,
I've been begging you to leave for ages.

It isn't fair when my feelings have waned,
I don't feel the same, but you insist that there's a flame-
So you stay, chaining me
To the heart of a knave
Insisting I'm property,
An object for you to keep
But I dream of him,
When I'm imprisoned
In arms while we sleep.
I just want you to leave,
I want to be freed.

Your soul is freezing cold, the place where I'm forced to grow old.
Pain falls like snow coursing through these brittle bones.

It hurts so much knowing his heart will never be in my hold.

-SLuR

Let our fingers slip from the bindings that confine us,
The items onto which we grip, that define happiness;
Tangible feelings don’t exist, they’re found deep inside.
Buried between wrinkles, is where emotions lie.
Love may linger in a kiss though it’s not found in spit,
It’s combined in shifting spirits and cocktailed chemicals,
Flowing through our bodies, it’s easily accessible.
Your satisfaction can’t be held; it can’t be bought
It’s a treasure that must be sought,
Not through aisles nor on shelves.
But simply, within ourselves.

-SLuR

Your heart is a cage and not a home
In your company, I am truly alone.
I try to break free but you shatter my bones,
Won’t listen to pleas or the logic I form.
Foundation weak, bound to crumple on itself;
You take my body and turn it to dusty ruins,
Nothing left but rubble and disgusting sewage.
Inside my heart trembles from your gentle bruising,
Made from the ways you use me;
You love to love when it’s amusing.

Convince me that I did it so you’re not abusing;
You’re a gift that’s not worth losing.
I crawl into fault that belongs to only me.

I’ve never seen a prison that looked so comforting.
You’re a hungry wolf, though portrayed as a sheep.

-SLuR

Shadows crawl into the light, a cowled face I can’t erase.
Replace my vision with the blind but leave a trace of your outline,
Enough for me to taste, to hide with sniffs- come back in drips;
Make my nerve endings slip, and miss the grey. Numb to pain,
Slitting wrists and feeding veins. Bitten lips can’t kiss without feeling shame,
So I’ll smile like a snake, turn, and slither away. Defense mechanisms activate,
The rattle sounds before I feel its strike
And I only see its eyes after feeling the bite;
Pleasure always comes guised as demise,
I’ll grab its hand tight, and let it be my guide
As we follow the venom that writhes inside.  

-SLuR

Loneliness blows his nose on the napkin of my life,
He crumples and folds my fragile paper existence,
Layered with stains of hatred.
Tears and blood and ****,
Throw me away as a gift;
Into the world's trash bin.
I've been inside before,
Scouring for something more
A crumb, some love, a hit;
Anything to make me forget
The love I hold for death.
It's so hard to keep things repressed
When the air is compressed
And blown straight into my face
Breathing is such a waste,
When I know of my fate.
Withering into the unknown,
Into the forgotten; our spirits home
Where worthlessness belongs.
You won't remember me when I'm gone.
Forgettable like silence once noise has been ignited,
Regrettable like violence, that kissed your mother's eyelids.
I was nothing but an empty vessel
That life has filled with useless drivel.
I'll stand and I'll swivel when you pull my strings
But being is unimportant when you're never seen.
I keep myself nice and clean for any hermit soul
That would wish to crawl inside my shell
And make it a home.
I'm full of dust and alone, in a gusty sandstorm
Wuthering winds of sins and pain
I shiver inside from what you say.
Smiling as the air carries me away.

-SLuR

Did you lose me?
Are you too busy?
Am I just so unimportant
That you'll toss me to the back burner
Like a failed dish?
Something you're done with.
I'm finished,
You're out of focus.
Focusing on the ones on their knees,
The ones who sing, and truly believe.
I thought you were accepting,
So why won't you accept me?
Did you lose me?
Are you too busy?
Am I just so unimportant
That you overlooked my name on the list?
Was it ever even there, written clearly in print-
Or cursive?
Maybe your thumb smudged me off,
It's possible that you erased me
And just ignore all of my calls.
It's not your fault,
I know it's mine with this filthy mind
And skin that crawls with sin, like parasites.
I'm sorry for killing your son-
I'm sorry I ****** him every night,
I want to be forgiven,
To turn all of my wrongs to rights.
I want to retrieve the innocence
You let life, so cruelly take;
Why then, was I not saved?
Was I a child so depraved?
Did you lose me?
Were you too busy?
Was I so unimportant
That you let him have his way?
Or is it just a part of this play?
Not everyone gets the chance
To see your face,
To feel your grace,
And find the path that leads your way.

You're not my father
And I think of you as cancer,
But I'll keep on calling
Hoping one day you'll answer.

-SLuR

I can feel my skin crawl over my bones
migrating slowly away from the cold,
on top of ghastly holes
that fill with dust when I’m alone,
aching to be
In your comfortable hold.

Where does all this time go?
It seems to twist, bend, and fold
Evading my fingers
That stay stuck in desperate pose,
Clawed and reaching for the unknown.

Waiting for something to fall into my palms,
That’s safe for keeping in these wounded arms.

Tell me you still care,
Let me know something is there;
To stop this skin from searching for your warmth,
To cease the oozing from these wounds,
Allowing them to heal up and close.

-SLuR

I’ve never heard your voice or the way it wavers when you’re sad, how it grows when you’re angry or the words your bitter tongue throws when you’ve gone mad. I’ve never felt your palm brush against my own, my fingers have never known the warmth you could give them in the cold. I’ve never heard your heart and I don’t know if it would work, does it sputter and cough a dusty beat or operate smoothly, churning and pumping robotic and coolly? I’ve never felt your weight, heavy, on top of my own. Never clawed down your back, never curled my toes savoring how you moan. I’ve never felt your pain, and I know I’ll never know just how far the blackness stains you, just how deep that hole can go. I’ve never kissed your lips, have yet to taste your skin; to see you peel it back, to have you hold me within. I’ve never been very special, have never held any importance so, I know one day you’ll leave me with only haunting apparitions- of a face I’ve never seen, smile naturally or wake deep from sleep and wipe off the morning. I’ll never feel the sting of missing you as I watch you leave or the backhand of happiness when you return yourself to me, but I know I won’t forget you when you’re just a fading memory because even though I’ve never, I’ve always loved you dearly.

-SLuR

Oh darling, let me take you to the land where the sunflowers crawl at night, stalking their nomad star. Let us bathe in petal rain, lying in a field that blooms with beating hearts. I long to feel your burning touch; melt away my skin, absorb my puddle of love. Let's run away to the world where the moon pulls on our blood. Stirring tides inside of veins, creating tsunami waves. I crave to feel your pulse; crash into me- erode, the lonely that creeps inside the curbs of my skull. I'll take you to the place that curves into the unknown. Let's dance in outer space, as our seams rip and we explode. I'll fall into a hole, if you water me and grow, a smile that you love to show. A smile my lips would love to know. Oh darling, let's follow the sunflowers and chase that nomadic star, wishes don't exist unless you believe that they are- that they do. I'd beg death to be with you. The sky is just a tomb made of a thousand twinkling souls. Burning just to tell you that I want to be close.

I shed my insecurities
To show you what's inside of me,
The most secret of things
That make up this being;
All of it, for your eyes to keep.

Only for your soul to see.

-SLuR

Your face slips along the wrinkles of my brain,
And my fingers trace the shape as they dance between my legs.
I sigh your name… to make you feel a little closer
But, you’re far away and you’ll never be my lover.
I’m yours to claim, but who would take something thrown away?
I’m filled with shame and I can’t scrub off these stubborn stains,
So, it’s better we stay separated by years and miles and feelings
Your words cut me deeply, imagine the wounds left by nerve endings.
I don’t need skin to feel touched by you, you writhe within
Shaped like fluttering butterflies and erupting cocoons,
Like sunrises whose colors aren’t muddied with doom.
I think I need you, I think I love you, I know I want you
Yet I don’t know what I am or how and where I stand.
I feel like I’m a void thrown to explode into your own,
Constricting and expanding inside our black holes.
Friendly words to bore you when you’re feeling alone,
Enough to occupy your mind and body, just not your soul.

-SLuR