Once upon a time
I almost ran away with you
We almost made a home together
We almost met our lives in the middle

We weren’t even salvageable children
But foreboding adults

There you stood at the altar
And it was never decided
Did I rip you away from it?
Or did you step away from it?
“We all made our choices”

But we still ran with it,
and
We almost did it,
We almost got there,
We were Icarus,
And our inextinguishable love,
It was the sun,
We burned up in it

I hate our phone calls now
I hate the spaces in between the small talk
“How is everything” I love you “******”
I hate being here while you are there
I hate how almost isn’t quite enough
For it to be all the way

I love you

What does it mean,
To love yourself

Tired of being used
For parts to fill
Yourself with
Use up until
You feel whole
Taking pieces of me
Taking pieces of me
Empty
Every time you leave me

Woman
Mother
Daughter
Wife

Pictures play
For each word
A box is created
Without hesitation

Jam yourself in it
Make them all smile

And no I won’t settle
Settle for some boy
Promising the moon and stars
Only to show up
Smelling like alcohol
with
Tin foil ***** and cardboard pieces
In hand

I deserve worship
Worship me
Fall down to your knees
I want someone thirsty to
Taste me

I am made up of the
Mountains and oceans
Dark skies and pastel summer days
I won’t settle
For some
Boy

And if you aren’t careful
Love will eat you up

Sometimes
I forget
I forget who I am

What I want
What I like