Christmas
is the christian holiday commemorating the birth of jesus christ in bethlehem
is a digital camera
is coming
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is for giving
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is a time of love
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is sharing
is a digital camera
is more than candle
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is a digital camera
is broken

A tall man shakes hands with a shorter man.
No big deal.

But it is a big deal.
Years ago the shorter man bloodied the tall man's nose
when they were younger
after the shorter man had rebelled against his father
whom the tall man liked
because the father was his friend and
despite the terrible things the father did to his family
the tall man liked him
because the father did things for him.

When the shorter man rebelled and threw the father from his home
the tall man, much younger then, tried to throw the short man out
and return the house to his father
but when the tall man burst through the door full of youthful indignation,
the short man bloodied his nose, turned him around and threw him back out the door.

For over fifty years they lived next door to each other never speaking
but now
at the funeral of a mutual friend
they meet face to face
hands are joined
and a smile is exchanged.

A very big deal indeed.

I've always thought that there should be
A change in personality
At that time of year when the holidays come 'round.

There is a change that I observe
In parking lots as people swerve
Around each other to get a spot they've found

They swear, they scream they go insane
In cars with kids they yell out names
names that'd make a life-long sailor blush

their faces red, they pound the wheel
with two arms flailing and fist of steel
shopping in a frantic blur and rush

Then done they speed out in the night
causing other drivers to pause with fright
going home to dinner with family and friends

They all sit down and raise a glass
asking peace and harmony to last
and beg for prosperity that never ends

please bless these folks who have no clue
or think a smidge of what they do
and take your shopping trips defensively

For they know not that when they bluster
it's all the self control we can muster
not to laugh so hard at them we can not see.

Summer's webs remain behind.

They are tucked between an air conditioner
who is leaving for vacation on a shelf in the laundry room downstairs
and the window frame that faces a lonely winter
tucked out of view on a short wall staring at the pond next door
which has been emptied by this Autumn's drought.

And like that old mottled and greyed lace dress I saw hanging limply in a thrift shop once,
they speak of livelier times.

I tried
I really did
For the second time
I signed up
I logged in
I looked at the syllabus
I clicked "play" on the videos
and I watched

I watched as a group of students
and the teacher they admired tremendously
began talking about poetry
talking and talking
about each word
each and every god  ****** word
"what does it mean?"
"why did she use this word?"
Et cetera
Et cetera
Blah blah blah

and although I wanted to finish the course
this time
I could feel moments of my life
moments put to better use
hugging my wife
talking to a child at college
writing poetry
or
finishing that dragon head puppet that calls from my work table

being ****** away

I saw a grown-up tonight for the first time.

I had seen her before

Seen her born
after three days of trying
and wrapped
in a warm blanket with just her little face
poking out.

Seen the elation in her face
when she realized she had walked
from her mother
to me
for the first time without her toy shopping cart
in front of her
for support

Seen her first day nursery school
of kindergarten
of new schools in a new town
of High School
of College

Seen her stoically sitting in  my mother's chair
in the living room of the house where I had grown up
saying goodbye
to her grandmother
for one last time

Seen her arrive home with a learner's permit
then with a driver's license
and later
leave the driveway
in grandma's green Subaru
her's now.

Seen her grow for 18 years
but tonight
sitting across the table
at a packed restaurant with lousy parking
in Ithaca New York
I saw and heard a grown-up
for the first time
and with that
the little girl
with the toy shopping cart
was gone.

In a basement office
the thunderstorm is felt
not seen