Sir B

Sir B Jan 2014

Today.
I looked into some
Crystal clear blue eyes
Yes. They did remind me of you
But I decided not to dwell on that

And.. I have also realized that
Loving someone..
Isn't the same
I realize that you read
These well-penned verses
But, you are missing the point
These aren't all of my emotions.

just...
Most of them.

This is driving me crazy, even before it started. Knew it would be a failed plan either ways, I think i have a good relationship with failing and doing things the are proclaimed impossible and un-do-able

Sir B Jan 2014

Step away from here

I shall step away
from your life
and the life of others
and from the life of
those
who find me stupid
and crazy

in short.
the life of everyone..
Because i am not accepted in anything..
I dont know what to be doing
I am at a loss
for whatever I do correctly
because its always wrong

No one likes being around me either, just gah, my recommendation would be that you do the same..

An old poem..

Sir B Jan 2014

No-matter my words

No matter the words i speak of
No matter what i would want

nothing getting accomplished
and nothing's going to be good

its a messed up world
with another messed up person

who can't think right
and cannot differentiate
the wrong from right

No matter the talks i talk about
No matter which scenes i play
cant dream.. so its invalid really

No matter the hymns
or the chimes of birds

No matter the flute melodies
or violin cries

No matter the world

------------------------------------------------------

but worlds the matter
and i am unable to do anything

not able to talk
not able to do nufin!

God.
Nothing works
ughhh

Bad luck
bad luck
bad luck

that's what follows me around

death, suicide
sleep forever

****** my soul already

Have to go to another debate tournament with a senior and he is going to count on me being good and advantageous, because he wants to go to nationals... I, am probably going to be his downfall.

Just have to have hope that i don't break
his dream and another person's
who also counts on me.

just. don't want to be a another cause to a sad ending!

Sir B Jan 2014

how to keep oneself going

The past made the present you,
but don't let it change the future you,
the future you can still change*

Clearly.
Things are affecting me.

Humph.

Sir B Jan 2014

how harsh does life get?

How harsh does it get you say?
oh, nothing much.
Just have to find the correct person

**haha.. correct person

11 hrs outside of house debating does this to my mind and makes me sadder

Sir B Jan 2014

It's happening and has happened

It's happening again
I am spiraling down
Feeling like I am losing memory
Feeling like being a useless
Oxygen consumer

It's happening again
My life being ******* up
Me going and knocking
On the doors I said I wouldn't

It's finally happened
I am there
Everything was blurry
But I am there

Just to sadden everyone.… I am never okay, never have been… everyday feels horrible.… no sleep just study and stay up never sleeping because I fear losing my memories.

Sir B Jan 2014

Universe doesn't care

The universe doesn't care
what you are doing to yourself
It doesn't want to **** you
because your time isn't over yet
It has no emotions
so if you keep cursing it
for never ending your life
its fine.

Universe won't feel a thing
because it has nothing
no emotions/no feelings

So,
henceforth
we should all up a decision
that
since the Universe doesn't care
we shouldn't care
but we still do!

We have emotions
we have feelings
we want to help each other
or do we?

hence, i decided to do this to myself.
*torture, with hauntings of your face
or just
plain torture

Nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope
I am tired
very tired
very unhappy
very sad
very unlikely
to do anything
besides cry myself
to sleep.