I miss you so much
I wish we didn’t have to part
I’m so sorry things didn’t work out
I couldn’t heal your broken heart
I wish I could fix things up
But you can’t heal old wounds with flimsy tape or gauze
Why did you try so hard to hide your flaws?
Even stitches will unwind
If given enough time
If things worked out differently
We could have been friends
Best friends
But things didn’t work out
All the screams and the shouts
The doubts we had about
Our love
Time’s hands you can’t bend
Backward and mistakes you try to mend
I just want to let you know
I’ll always love you
It was never false, never a show
Even though you didn’t care
About the things that we both shared
The memories
The bittersweet melodies
Beautiful elegies
You created
Out of thin air
Revealing a heart so raw
And so bare
I just want to let you know
These things I’ll never forget
I’ll never regret
That indigo night when we first met
Under moonlit sky
And approving stars
So innocent and white
I’ll remember that starry night
Until the day I die

*I’ll still yearn to mend
The things we had
Everything will work out in the end
I understand it’s time to say goodbye
If only we had a second try
Another chance
And you didn’t have to die
On the inside
I wish it didn’t have to be this way

I feel this breaking up
Bad connections worsen
Like static on the other side of the phone
The other perspective
Silence shouts louder than
The lies escaping your dead blue lips
Disconnection looms up ahead
Tension severs
The knife going in
And unrequited love
Counts for nothing

You don’t know pain until
                                          You see
The scars on her wrists
Or the short texts
Leaving you hanging
Wondering why

You don’t know pain until
                                          You hear her
Puking her guts out in
A bathroom stall
Her excuse for too tight
Clothes she tried on at the mall

You don’t know pain until  
                                          You see her
Bleeding her heart out
On her bedroom floor
Sprawled out next to an empty cartridge
A lethal piece of machinery
And shiny silver bullets
Scattered about
As if they were part of the scenery

You don’t know pain until
                                            You look
Death in the eye and the truth
Staring straight at you
                                           You don’t know
Pain                                                      
           Until
                                

                                  It’s    
                                            too        
                                                       *late

I wish I could become one with the snow
Soaring freely
Pure and white
Living in a state of everlasting chill
The feeling of perpetual numbness
Beckons
Winter calls me home

I continue to flutter about
Drifting downward
Without a care
Maybe I’ll land on a soft pillow
Along with my other friends
Instead of fighting against
Whirling winds
And the threat of summer

Perhaps I’ll land on your roof
Shift into an icicle
Embrace the sharpness
As I hang over the edge
Tapering down
Melting Ever so slowly
And remind you that
Pain begets
Beauty

Watch out