Alone
Lost and forgotten
I carry on
Throughout my life
Wandering
Hoping to find
Meaning
Of my meaningless exsistance.

For months
I thought of things
Reasons
No more excuses really
As to why
What did I do to you
And the answer never appears
So why do I even bother

Holding onto something
That at the time
Felt so good
So right
And for what
Just to be cast
Into the darkest
Recesses of this wretched life
By those closest to me

What will it take?
What do you want?
Tell me...
Or am I just a fleeting memory

I know I mean nothing now
I knew it from the start
My mind has fallen victim
To sweet
And empty
Promises
The grounds
Have been defiled
With lies
Wrath
Envy
Lust
Disloyalty
To where it has no room
For honor

So I walk alone
In this life
With nowhere in mind
For you see
All I ever was and ever will be
Is Forsakened.

Hmm how to discribe
You
As I see you
Two faced.

You smile
And talk buddy buddy
To me
But behind me
You throw me in the dirt

It is people like you
That really get me angry
Why be one way to my face
And behind me another

Take a good look
And see the damage
Your forked toungue has done
For now
I dont want to
Even be your friend

For when I found you
Two faced
I realized
Friendship wasnt worth saving

So be two faced
And the world will see
How you really are
And who you are
Two faced.

I watch you
From a distance
Walking alone
Looking around
Remember me

You smile though
You want to cry
Why
Why do you hide
Remember me

You left me without
Saying goodbye
Yes I cried
But I also died
Remember me

Do not shed a single tear
For me please
I wasnt worth you time
You spent it with others
Remember me

I told you I still care
And that I loved you
But nothing
Helped
Remember me

So again please dont cry
Cause this isnt a lie
I did die
Cause of you
Just remember me
The way I used to be
Before you destroyed me.

Walking the narrow streets
I feel your presence
Everywhere
But I am alone
Where are you?

I rub my arms
Continuing to move forward
The current of life
Pulling me along.

I dont feel safe
You left
No word
No sound
I cried
I screamed

What would it take
For you to come back
If I could have one wish
It would be you being here again

I find myself
In front of your door
Peeking in the window
I see you
Drinking away your sorrows
Let me in
One last time
Sing the song
You sang to me
Before you left

I wanna hold you
Console you
Why wont you let me
Self pride
Ahh let it go
I loved you
Didnt you see...

Now your asleep
On the sofa
And having a nightmare
The high pitched scream
As a car slams into me

You blame yourself
Since that night
Ill sing you this one line
Throughout time
It wont rain all the time..

So ill see you on the other side
My love
And keep you warm from above..

An angels touch
Soft
Warm
Loving

An angels voice
Peaceful
Sweet
Caring

An angels embrace
Protective
Nurturing
Calming

Her heart
Never swaying
Full of love
Undying loyalty

I look up to heaven and cry
"I am down here....
Will I ever feel that again...
To be touched by my angel.?"

"Touched by an angel... Loved for all eternity.."

I had another nightmare
About my life and you
I know your ok
But this one its hard to forget

I make my way down a dark hall
My hands brush the sides so I dont fall
The walls feel wet
Is it paint or is it blood
Im afraid to find out

I make my way to a room
Lit by only candle glow
They lead me to the center
Where I see a young girl
Dressed in white

She is crying because boys hurt her
She screamed for help but noone came
I look around and see a coffin
Flag drapped over it
My heart races
Thinking it is you
Laying there.

With shakey hands I open the lid
I fall backwards and scoot back across the floor
It is my body....
But how....
Why...
Who did this...

Three hooded figures step
From deep inside the darkness
Each having a word across the chest
Past...
Present...
Future...

I pull the little girl close to me
Shielding her if they tried
The figures smile and raise a hand
Something happens
As if I was hit several times
But I didnt fall
I didnt move

As suddenly as they appeared
They disappeared
The little girl
Lay in my arms
Her blood
Bright crimson
Flowing upon the cold stone floor

She looks up and touches my face
I mentally break
I kept saying
Im sorry....
Im sorry...
She looks away from me as a white golden glow encases her
Small figure

She is taken from my arms by
A guardian angel
As he stands to leave
I simply ask
Who is she...
He stops
Turning to me
He speaks
"You know who she is...
She is you... At age 10...
The age you lost part of her...
Your innocence..."

I stare at the angel
"Then where were you...
Who are you..."

He smiled
"I was protecting you....
Though you did not see me...
You sensed me....
And you fought back...
You know who I am...
I will be watching and waiting...
And when your time is up...
I will come for you..."

I woke up in a cold sweat.
But the angels words echo
In my heart
"You know who I am...
When your time is up...
I will come for you...."

So you tell me
You moved on
Thats fine
No ill will
But you turn around
Bash me in a post you did
I wouldnt do that
My mom taught me better
However I never said
I wont get even
You said you want to be friends
But you wanna know something
You lied to me
About everything
But did I bash you online
No...
I respect you enough
To do it to your face
Then walk away
So I will get even
And when I do
You will understand the saying
Hell hath no fury
Like a woman scorned.