I don't understand "love"
I don't understand why we all strive for love,
why we still want it even after we have been hurt
even though it seems each time it hurts more and more
it's like we're all children, and our mother would tell us not to play with fire but we still were tempted to..
it's like the things that's are worst for us are the things that make us feel so alive
why do we still try with something after it hasn't worked out so many times
I've learned to just give up
I don't understand why all the things that feel so good are so bad
sinning feels so good but is so bad
we all sin,
why do we smoke and drink and pollute our bodies?
why do we cheat on the ones we love?
why can't we wait until marriage?
the world is corrupt
I don't understand the decisions people make
and I guess I never will..

she used to be the girl that would
always fall in love
the girl that would always get her heart broken
but all those nights alone
she began to think
to figure out this game of love
and eventually she did..
she was no longer heart broken- but she was the heart breaker
she had no remorse
she felt as if they all deserved it
she used them just as they used her
she became okay with it
she was numb to it all
numb, oh so numb..

Running into someone you once loved can bring back all the memories of that person,
you start to reminisce all the time you spent together
you think of all the good times
you think of the things that were left unsaid
that if you could do it again you would do it right
but it's over now
we're no longer lovers
your my past
and I can't go back
because along with the good times came with bad times
I like to believe things happen for a reason
and us ending being one of them
even though it hurt
we used to be lovers
we can not love again.

there she was another stressful day followed by a lonely night
You'd think she'd be used to the pain by now
But you don't seem to go numb
You tell yourself your numb
You try to convince yourself you don't feel anymore
But you do feel
and the memories just ******* replay in your head OVER AND OVER
nothing you can do will make you forget
you just want to forget
they say time heals
but in reality it doesn't
after so much time passes and things are still the same you get tired
So tired of living
so there she was
all alone in her room
full bottle off pills in one hand
in the other her goodbye note
saying how she's sorry and that now she can finally be at peace
how many will it take this time
so many failed attempts she'd have to be sure it's work this time
so she'll just take one for every regret- every time her heart ever got broken- every time someone told her she loved her and lied why did they lie?- one for her mom that also drowns her sorrows with the bottle- one for her dad that escapes his regrets through a needle- one for all the times she tried so hard to be there for all the people who eventually stabbed her in the back- one for the failure she had became- one for each heart she ever broke..

fill her head up with great hopes of the future (knowing you do not want one with her ofcourse)
tell her your not like the rest
make her feel as if she is the the only one
send mixed signals
try to talk to her as little as you can, and when she asks why just simply tell her you were busy.. a little lie never hurt anyone right?
because this girl doesn't care about you right?
or does she.. more then you'll know.. or will be too dumb to see,
maybe once you realize you had a queen
she will be gone

it all starts with a spark
after the spark comes a flame
this flame represents "love"
most have a desire to feel this fire
but when you play with fire,
you get burnt