It's 4 AM and visions of you are keeping me awake.  
My mind is cluttered with thoughts I shouldn't be having...

I want to hold your hand in the backseat when my parents can't see.
I want to kiss that spot on your neck that I've been dying to.
I want to map out your body with only my fingertips.
I want my name spilling out of your mouth incoherently.
I need you.

Oh, please understand that when I said
"Stop..."
I really didn't mean it -- by no means did I mean it.
But I needed you to.
God knows what I would have done otherwise.

My mind is occupied by you --
    you're always there, awaiting the dark nighttime to stir.
Flashes of your smile appear behind my eyes when they close.
Visions of your eyes haunt my thoughts.
Memories of your voice, reading your poems aloud...

I can't seem to focus anymore.
All I can ever think about is you.

    You've become quite the distraction.

But hey, who's complaining?

She was a girl In an island of sins
She had a pet that comes every month
It was white and bright and it only comes at night
In the top of the mountain
At the sunset she sits and wait
Looking at the sky blue full of stars
And here it is here it is her pet
The full moon
Where have you been my beloved pet?
I've waited nights for you
I brought you sweet white sugar just like the color's of you
Hope a bird wakes up and fly it up to you
It took you a month to came out from the black sparkling curtain
Are you scared?
Do you fear the stars my shining pet?
You see, I never touched one
But I always feel them like they're in my hand
Glowing and warm
They Give you a feeling that everything will be alright
They never fall from the sky
They are always there when you want a wish
Harmless they will forever be
My pet, don't hide behind the curtain
There's nothing to be scared of
Nothing but glowing stars

I'm tired of writing the cheesy words I used to write..
I'm tired of listening to all of their crap..
I'm tired of not reading my own mind..
I feel like a balloon flying up high screaming to fall..
I just don't want to think anymore..
I believe that every truth comes from a lie..
I believe that I'm a lost soul in a pointless life..
Im nothing but careless bones smiling with no whys..
No questions to add just a soul sailing between clouds..

I won't love you like a man will love you.
I won't love you
Like a woman will love you either.
I wish I could say
I fit something I knew a word for
In terms of love.
But no.
I will love you
Like the ground loves the rain after a drought.
I will love you like the moon
Loves its little glimpses of the sun
As it slips behind the earth again,
Lovers
So similar but so different,
Never in the same place at once.
I will love you
In terms of Nature
I will love you
In terms of
Universe.
But
I cannot love you in terms of man
Or woman
Unless you mean
All that either has ever been.
And I think I should apologize-
I think you should know that
If you think this is different because I am a woman,
That's not why.
It is different because I am a cyclone,
An earthquake,
A natural disaster of hurt and hope,
And I love you like the planets love the star
That gravity bends them towards
And that
Is not how any man or woman I've ever met
Has loved before.
And I am not sure if I will ever meet another one
Like me.
And I am not sure
I would even want to.

I'm lying to myself saying My heart doesn't ache at seeing your name...
I'm lying to myself saying I don't need you anymore...
I'm lying to myself saying I don't want you...
I'm lying to myself saying I don't miss you...
I'm lying to myself saying I'm glad we won't see each other again...
I'm lying to myself saying I don't dream of you...
I'm lying to myself saying I don't cry over you...
I'm lying to myself saying I don't still love you...
Because Inside I know the truth...My heart does ache every time I see your name,I do need you,I do want you,I do miss you,I'm sad we won't see each other again,I do dream of you,I do cry over you,I do still love you...I always have and I think I always will

I'm not the sun, the moon or the sky
I don't have that sparkle when you look in my eye
I won't say I love you and kiss you good night
I won't say I'm sorry when I start a fight

(Added 02/2014)
I'm just not the one, the love, that guy,
We're not meant to be, I say with a sigh
It was good, it was fun, I had a great time,
But now all that's left is me, and this rhyme.

(Added 03/2014)
But maybe you are,  and maybe I do
Maybe it's love that I feel for you
My heads a mess and now that you're gone
My heart can't sense what's going on

Our past, our plans and future were bright
I looked in your eyes and saw a light
Alone, without you, I compare all to you
And none measure up, my heart is askew.

Don't come back again
Here's the truth
I got attached to you for a reason
I needed someone at that time
When I entered a new life
When I forced to get new people
When I had to accept the changes
When I had to live in the new place
I needed someone at that time
When I had to face everything alone
When I had to make serious choices
When it was hard to be alone
I needed someone at that time
When I got attached to you
But it's not what I thought
The reason, it wasn't you
I needed someone
So that's why I let you in easily
And I got attached
I needed anyone
So it wasn't just because it's you
I was fooled when I thought it was love
I needed someone who's anyone
It's not the person who you are
but the time when you came in
And also, you left at a time
When I still thought I'm in love you
But after facing the life after you
I found out that the real reason
Which made you everything in my life isn't here anymore
I found out that now I created a new life
I got a new social life
Got used to the place
And already made my choices
Now after that period of time
I do not need you
The reason isn't here anymore
And you left at a perfect time.
Don't come back again.