I am a gloriously amorphous glob of tidal identity waxing and waning from unrecognizably dissipated thought systems to cohesively recognizable energetic structures. Behold, I am typing words and as I do so I am dismantling the very foundation of my preexisting paradigm because as it is dismantled it is no longer the existing paradigm but even so the existing paradigm is always the existing paradigm in that it is operating currently. Hurrah!! Onward, to where no one has gone before, to where no now has never evered till this very now! To infinity, and before that!

Cover up, empty ***.
Feelings down, thoughts up.
Wanted to cry, but must be a man.
Looked around, no hope found .
Phone ringing, mum calling ,
Hello mom are you okay??
Son I'm starving nothing to eat (crying) .
It's ok mom, I will get back to you soon. I will send you some money  and don't cry mom I said , with my eyes covered in tears.
Actually I have not even a penny, I'm  cashless. Totally broke.
The worst feeling I have evered had is telling my mom it's going to be okay, when nothing seems to be okay and no hope of it getting okay or better  soon. To cut the long story short
I'm  so happy mama is happy now
Because her dogs eat five times a day