whenever they gave awards at school
iwas always so happy to come home
and give you the white piece of paper
that read "GOLD HONORS"
i think you even used to
put it on the fridge for a while
back then all i wanted to be
was a writer
i thought people would think
it was silly
but it stuck with me
when i´d wake up you'd always have
waffles and a banana milkshake
on the table for my breakfast
i was younger than ten
but now i realize what it meant
to wake up earlier than everyone else
and make food for each
of your little chickens
we had two red cars:
one for each of you
abuelo kept his car so clean
and always smelled so clean
he’d buy flowers
for the women on their birthdays
it was a grand gesture
i understand more than ever
now that no one gives me flowers
there's this thing you used to say, Abue
about each and every one of us
how you loved us
the way you loved your fingers
each one so different
some shorter some longer
a lot of the things you say
they stick to my head
but i understood then
and i understand now
you can love a lot of different people
in a lot of different ways
it gets a little cold now
i know things are a little sad now
with no thanksgiving dinner
or christmas and midnight
with cheese and wine
it'd be so much better now i´m older
i understand things a little bit more
like how precious a warm meal is
and how things are always better
when you're surrounded
by family and warmth
the last time we saw each other
you let me read The Pigman
and we watched Persépolis together
i cry a little each time at the end
when the grandma lets the jasmine
fall in slow motion from her breast
it's the sort of thing grandmothers do
that make you feel so warm inside
like the scars from your C section
i always thought were so beautiful
it's been years since i saw you
my mom woke me up early that day
to pick you up at the airport
it was supposed to be a surprise
but I had this feeling something was up
i couldn't believe it when i saw you
my grandparents walking towards me
and i was so happy to hug you
you smell like a mother
i don't know what it means
but it's like being in the arms of someone
you know has always loved you
and knows just who you are