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My proof
pretoria    Forced to swallow my pride now I'm stuck having to digests that bitter thing I call self, gave my priorities female names so u could ...
INDIA    truth is proof


Sarah Martindale  Mar 2019
Sarah Martindale Mar 2019
They are the wounds that will always be attached to us
Some of us have scars on our hearts
Where we loved someone, only to find out they didn't feel the same
Scars from where the heart was broken, but never fully healed

Scars on our brains from bad memories
From things we remember, but so desperately wish we could forget

Scars on our back from where people have stabbed us too many times
From where you let someone into your life, held them close, only to find out they were using, and had no intention to stay

Scars on your shoulders from when you were forced to choose
From when two people you loved got in a fight, and threw you in the middle of it all
From they pulled on your arms, forcing you to pick one or the other
Then they desert you for following your heart and trusting your instincts
Either way, in the end, they both left
That was always going to be the end result

Scars from your closest friends when they said "All is forgotten and in the past", yet they never truly forget
Somehow, whatever happened, will always be relevant

Then there are the scars that life gives you
All the bad experiences that you try so hard to bury, yet are still so close to the surface
Constantly reminding you that you are never enough
Even though you try so hard to convince yourself otherwise
You are always trying to convince yourself that you ARE enough

Then there are the scars that you have given yourself
The ones you so desperately try to hide
The ones you don't want anyone to see because you're so scared of what they'll say
The scars you hide because you want to do this on your own
You want to show people that you are stronger than they think you are...even though it doesn't feel like it
The scars that are on your wrists from when you wanted everything to end...and still do

Everyone of us has scars
Sometimes it just takes a while for people to notice them

But scars aren't all bad
They are proof

Proof that you struggled
Proof that you wanted to end everything the only way that you knew how
Proof that you've fought countless battles
Proof that you are, and always will be, victorious
Proof that you are broken, and that the broken live on
Proof that you've survived
Proof that you're still fighting for everything to get better...even when you think it won't
Proof that you won't give up or give in
Proof that no matter what happens, you will fight harder than you ever have before

And when the war is won, you will be able to say, "I am stronger than I have ever been, and NO ONE will ever tear me down"

That's what a scar is

All of us have them
We just need people to look deeper than the surface to find them, and help us heal
Quinn Apr 2015
15 years old:
invite a group of friends over
to sit in my empty living room
with brand new wood floors -
we’re renovating

proof: I’m not poor

16 years old:
hang out of my sister’s
bedroom window,
swing into wet mulch,
steal away to twone’s
to get hammered and
touch my first ****

proof: I’m not afraid

18 years old:
lament over the fact
that I’m the last senior
alive without a cell phone

you got the flip, *****,
happy birthday

proof: I’m one of you

21 years old:
rip six foot bongs,
squirt jaeger bombs
into mouths from a gallon jug,
***** black sushi sacrifice

proof: I can hang

22 years old:
get caught with drugs
in 90 degree Arizona desert,
make friends with drug dog,
tell the truth while you take a ****,
sit in a cell and make plans
to call brother for bail

proof: the truth won’t always set me free

11 years old:
go into a department store
with my auntie,
heavy footsteps follow,
head to the juniors department,
heavy footsteps follow,
turn round, see an old man,
think, ‘he must be shopping for
his granddaughter’

proof: innocence is blind

have to ***, head to the bathroom,
heavy footsteps follow
with ragged breathing,
watch as Velcro sneakers stand
just beyond the door my stall,
curl into a ball and
wait, wait, wait,
as my brain takes on silent screaming

proof: I am nothing but prey

hear the next stall door
creak open,
watch feet walk in and legs
begin to bend,
explode out of stall
into store,
find auntie and begin
hyperventilation and
true demonstration of fear

proof: I am a woman now
work in progress
Miss Jade Murder  Sep 2013
Miss Jade Murder Sep 2013
I want proof
Proof that you're real
Proof that you exist
Because throughout my dreams
You've come into reality
I made you up
My image
My everything
All that you are
Is all that I've wanted
I want proof
Proof that you're real
Proof that you exist
When you look in the mirror what do you see
Who stares back at you
What glares back at you
Do you SEE me
If you sense me, then you know my despondency
You carry my burden
I've awoken and acknowledged who I am
What I am
Please give me proof
Proof that you're real
Proof that you exist
When I look in the mirror
I see me