scarmaya nicole

scarmaya nicole Jan 18

it is the pleasure in killing myself.

the sting from my wounds are my food.

scarmaya nicole Jan 4

there is always this odd feeling whenever i hang out with people from my past. not that we have cut our connection, but we just rarely see each other, and we often only do just to catch up with our lives. i cannot help but to reminisce and notice the difference between now and then. how we used to be like this and how we are doing now. it is both nostalgic and hollow. we are now not who we were. life now is not how it was.

i believe that if time machine exists, going through it would be a feeling similar like this.

scarmaya nicole Jan 4

nostalgia

there is this feeling after reading the stories you once did when you were still a young innocent child. it is somewhat sickening, rooted from lost hope. a similar feeling when i realized my childhood was over.

nostalgia could be poison when rooted in regret for unwanted growth. life was better before i was able to cook by myself.

scarmaya nicole Jan 3

it is what it is

when you have reached the depth of your internal suffering
that intense heaviness in your heart
and the most comforting part of your sorrow

to realize that you are done

the pleasuring guilt when you just had enough.

scarmaya nicole Jun 2023

love

u know it's love, when the same person who once shook your world when they came, now became the reason of its silence and comfort.

i guess, this is love.

scarmaya nicole May 2023

comfortable silence

i've never felt even more understood
when we shared that comfortable silence between us
it's the language of our love
that nakedly speaks for our souls

no one could ever read me the way u do.

scarmaya nicole Apr 2023

an outcast

can u call it home when u rarely feel included?

i wish u would let me in.

#outcast