You took my innocence
You took my sense of safety
You took my ability to trust
You changed my feelings on intimacy

But you gave me much more
You gave me awareness
You gave me caution
You gave me a blazing fire

A fire that burns inside
A fire to fight with
You had absolutely no idea
How much stronger I would be

You took my sense of safety
My ability to trust
But you gave me even more
A am forever a fighter

I found a shell on the beach, and for some reason
I was immediately drawn to it, this jagged sunrise;
It was not especially distinguished or special,
But had enough power to draw me in.

As I snatched it from the sands, it clutched to the earth,
Urging my rusty hands to pick on things their own size.
Seeing others of its like consigned to a jar, it knew the best
way to help was to submit, and join its kin.

I admired and searched through all the streaking avenues;
I knew I had to have it - natures free gift, and a sweeter still treat.
Lost in the many grains of colour, I close my eyes,
seeing through the outer armour.

Your hard skin is as my shell: rough and worn from
wave upon wave of ceaseless battering, but never beat.
Keep me, for I am unique, even though there are
millions like me in the sea.

My little darling,
Have you ever known,
You were always,
My sentient metronome?

You speak a beat,
And I follow your tongue,
You set the rhythm,
I just follow along.

My little metronome,
Lately we have had different dreams,
You have dreams of the ocean,
I’ve been dreaming of New Orleans.

I know I can never change you.
I can’t make you change your song.
I’m afraid I must leave you,
We’re just not getting along.

My little metronome,
You still set the rhythm of my heart,
Maybe in the future,
We won’t be so far apart.

And one can never know,
Where either one of us will grow,
Maybe one day I’ll turn out to be,
Your sentient metronome.

I'm scared
Scared of all the unknown
Scared of change
Scared of failure
     ...and of success
All the "what ifs"
They terrify me
I can't get back what I've lost
I don't know what I'm doing
I need help
I won't ask for it

The day you said 'I love you',
I became breathless and had nothing to say.
And I could see the hurt in your eyes,
as you began to walk away.
But what did you expect?
For me to answer right away?
In a blink of a eye you were gone,
Not waiting to see what I had to say.
What if I said I loved you right back?
What if I said it right away?
What if I was to ask what took you so long?
What if you weren't wrong?
What if those words had come from my mouth?

For years I've wanted to tell you,
For years I wanted to shout .
For so long I have been biting my tongue,
It's bleeding for me to just spit it out.
I wanted to say that for days,
I wanted to tell you in so many ways.
But you will never know
'cause once you made up your mind to walk away,
I found all the words I wanted to say.

Tonight
I write
these feelings of pride
Honor,
Courage,
Sadness,
Worry,
Pride
&
Love

Here we salute you
to your endeavors,
to your dreams,
to your friendship,
that will be here
long after the war is over,
long after the dead are buried
long after you've,

gone

You walk by, but you don't see me. All you see is the skeleton of lost potential that you once saw in me. I've gotten rid of all my hopes and fears and everything that I believed in.

I have given up.

I don't know what you ever saw in me. Maybe it was the sea in my sad blue eyes, the fight in the will I once had, the depth of my laugh, my compassion for humanity, my faith in beings.

That's all gone now.

The character that filled me from head to toe now lies shattered in the barren waste lands of your love. As the wind rattles my rib cage, I can almost remember the warmth it once filled me with.

Almost.

You hear the rattle, like hollow wooden wind chimes in an Oregon October. But you keep walking, carrying a smirk in your pocket for when no one is watching.