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Rachel Elizabeth Nov 2012
The damage is done
Blade already ******
Brain already shut down
Now numb and empty
So void of feeling
Hollow to the core
Substance is long gone
What is left?
Empty shell of a girl
Already damaged, done
Vacuous and blank
Like a sheet of paper
Not yet tainted
With lies already written
By my own devilish hand
A blank slate with
Room left for life
To be lived and loved
What is left?
Nothing, emptiness
A blank book with room
For written words
By my own hand
What is left?
Hollow to the core
An empty shell
Already damaged and done
Rachel Elizabeth Nov 2012
So here I sit, contemplating
Alone in my thoughts
Wallowing in self pity
Alone in my own head
Wanting for something
Not sure what
Needing for something
Of some tangible thing
Something to hold
Such a thing
Does not exist
Such a thing
I cannot have
Just beyond my grasp
I see others enjoy
Laughing in frevolity
While I sit in contemplation
Drowning in my thoughts
Unaware of those
All around me
Laughing with joy
While I sit alone
In silent contemplation
Dreaming of a life
I will not have, dreams
I will not reach, hopes
I will never see
So I sit in quiet thought
Alone in my own head
Rachel Elizabeth Nov 2012
I was never good enough
Hit it and quit it
That describes me
I don't deserve anything
Nothing more than that
That proved true
Sad existence
Rachel Elizabeth Nov 2012
There is I story I must tell
The tale of a broken girl
She always knew who she was
Until her dreams were taken
Snatched away by evil men
The took away her fight
No longer was the girl
Biting, clawing, and scrapping
She was weak and lifeless

This is  the tale of a shattered girl
With a fairy tale childhood
Except that everything was ****
She was torn then and destroyed now

After many years of fighting
Anyone would eventually give up
This damaged girl is no different
She has no more fight inside
No more strength in her bones
All out of stamina for battling

The tale of a battered, broken girl
Rachel Elizabeth Nov 2012
The world moves around me
People go about their days
No one the wiser, in tune
They see content and peace
All the while, I scream
At the top of my lungs, but
All the comes out is a squeak
Where has my voice gone?
That was taken too, surprise
No more *dignity, virtue, or naïveté *
That was stolen, I am HOLLOW
A walking "vision" but no guts
Nothing, simply a human suit
A sack of "I'm fine" and "just down"
No one can fully know me
No one wants to see that
A hollow girl with nothing
Not a thing to offer others
The world continues on and on
No knowledge of the pain
That fills my very being, soul
Make up and long sleeves, they hide me
They are my shield and cloak
No one wants to see what
Is under my armor, no one
A hollow girl, no substance
Rachel Elizabeth Nov 2012
The weight removed
From my very chest
Heavy and debilitating  
My thoughts silenced
Only for a moment
Then back again
Self hatred inside
My soul being drained
Earthly body fragile
Breakable with touch
The weight lifted
Lungs are full
Rachel Elizabeth Nov 2012
How much time have I wasted?
Being sad and low
How much time have I wasted?
In hospitals, on gurneys
How much time have I wasted?
Hating instead of loving

The days go by and by
The flow effortlessly past
Such as breath from a mouth
Simple even, child's play

Days months, and years pass
No more wasting time
Time to make the best
Of this forgotten time
That we can now enjoy
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