Under stars
Bat steals apples
In shadowed leaves

In a dream in another place
Were children of the tribes
In a large open grassland
Playing games running and laughing
Elders were around the perimeters
All busy and people and horses

In the space a rectangular stone
Suspended by ropes hollow beneath
I stood under it's interior
Looking up I began to sing

I sang from the heart in a language I don't know
It was taken into the stone bell
Amplified and my whole being was in that song

Long afterwards when I was sitting
A man came to me and he said
The elders have heard your song and translated it
Then he went away without telling me the words.

Imaginary blue lit by the shining golden orb
Warmth and lazy comfort transient day
Seems eternal
Trails of menace blend in and are ignored
A hoverfly rainbow shimmering wings sway
Tiny moments
High in pure enjoyment into blue a bird absorbed
Silver wings wide warm air lifts easily looks for prey

I do like being loved by Batcat
Her purr is so lovely and sweet
She wakes me on time in the morning
When I give her something to eat.

There are moments when I am sleeping
When I wake in sort of a crush
And Batcat is sitting upon me
With a smile on her face of pure mush

Her sweet little face isn't pretty
But her love lights it up like the stars
She plays with all of my trinkets
So I keep all the best ones in jars

She sits by my side when I'm gaming
On catnip decidedly high
I yell as she walks on the keyboard
Then she looks at me wondering why

It's nice to be loved by Batcat
When I'm weary from working all day
But I wish in her frenzied attention
That she'd put her sharp claws away

When god died in my heart forlorn I wandered
The Other said, "There is no God" the nettles bloomed
I sat upon the high hills in the beauty
Of oranges and greens and reds and blues

The Other took and showed me then the meaning
I saw that gods and death are intertwined
"There is no death" the words were gently whispered,
"There is no other moment now or passing time"

Into the realms of death I burst in fury
To save my child I saw them take away
I followed there in greyness skyless country
Determined full of anger unafraid

We traveled back along the path together
Where tangled roots soil clutched and skies of gray
To walk that green path few have ventured
The others watched us guiding danced and played

I know there is no heaven for I have been there
There is no end in endless energy
No gods or rulers in the place beyond us
Only Others who are wild and free.

Welcome back little traveller
Blood of my blood
Fresh from the forming
Into confusion
Seeing with new eyes
All you have forgotten.
Wisdom of the source
You have to learn anew
To stand and speak
Treasure this moment
Keep the source with you
Listen to your angels

As long as people who do accidentally
Stumble onto the absolute knowledge
That there are Others
Are ridiculed and attacked and injured
And made afraid to speak..
The rest of us are walking blind
In darkness.
Yes there are black holes
They reside in the psychosis of ignorance
Of the majority
Where precious experience is pulled inside and lost forever.

Tripped out on Californian sunshine,
In the fields a whole troop of us
Running giggling round the fishing lakes
Or sat under the deep dark trees
I once found a whole city with streets
In miniature on a path
Citizens of blue and green and red walked different paths
Sue, Foxy and the others shouting to come on
I said no I'll just stay here a while
At least I had a reason
Splodge spent the whole day walking round the same tree
Sid had to drag him off
Then we built massive fires in the barn with no roof
They thought we were satanists doing rituals
Pulled it down
Ghosts in my head, some are gone
It was stranger the day I watched the Sun melting
Dripping onto snow drops of gold

Cantlin Stone was no mans land
So everyone could camp there
But it was a sorry tale that made it so
In the tangled bilberries a man was found
He had no home no place he just lay down and died
Cantlin Stone had three borders, counties three
But all said it don't belong to me
And none would bury him
So as all counties said the land weren't theirs
It was a resting place for travellers

Charlie was my friend, he was a chef
Then packed everything in to play saxaphone
When he played the universe stopped to listen
But ****** was claiming him, this he overthrew
In favour of wine

One day on a beaten track I found him sleeping
A woman had told me to beware the *****
She stood at the top to watch me walk past
So that I'd be safe.
I saw my friend and sat down, we smoked a smoke
Talked of old times
Fields on either side and the woman
Stood in amazement until I waved to say it was all alright

One night I was sleeping and woke in the dark
Charlie was saying "Wake up wake up"
The wind was howling outside
He took hold of my shoulders and shook me awake
I said
"******* Charlie, I'm trying to sleep"
Turned over and closed my eyes.

I found out a few days later
He'd died that night
In another place far from me
Of a final old times shot

A wise man once said that if you are hated by the world
As not belonging
Then you are loved by heaven

If you are hated by the world, not belonging
And heaven is a non existent Shangri-La
Then it is the universe itself who enfolds you
The whole appearance, cosmic mind

We went to Conway castle
Charlie and Ibbo and Foxy and me
We climbed up a very tall tower
So far the view almost space we could see

Then Ibbo said,
"Wow look down 'ere"
Peeping over the edge

Being one for a lark in I went and looked down
There was a small interruption
In consciousness
Then I came round
In Charlie's arms as he carried me down
Wobbling on stony steps
Round and round
Down to the ground

Entrenched in religion
Taught from my birth
I began to awaken

I branched to the path
Of a strict regime
Thinking there was truth
Eyes started to see
Contradictions

The others had shown
Had spoken to me
In an earlier time
I noticed there be
Repetitions

One day I slipped
From tight rules and laws
The elders came
To point out my flaws

You can stay they said
So to begin
Swear now on this book
You won't do it again

I knew well the book
Cover to cover
I looked at them
Thought of my lover

Swear I won't I replied
For I have not the power
To pledge for all time
In this single hour

For that book you hold
Says Don't make an oath
I refuse I say no
To your ungodly troth

So they turned in their pride
With their unseeing eyes
To wander in darkness
Condemned me to die

I thought I was ******
For a while and a while
Then the ones I knew better
On me they did smile

They sent me the clues
Gave me new keys
To follow the truth
Wherever it leads

If it leads to damnation
Still truth is the path
If it leads to pure knowledge
Home I'll be at last

As the short summer night had passed me by
I went out to see the sun rise.
A bat flew by and a butterfly
The fairies shook the tree and a breeze whispered by
My sadness was soothed in it's sighs.

The song of morning's a wave
Rises and falls like the ocean
So high in it's frequency
All around perfect colossal chaotic harmony
Washed my spirit clean

The world is turned by the song of the birds

She came to me all smiling
Asked to visit my friend the tree
She said she had a gift for it
And I thought some for me
I thought she meant go walking
And share a drink of wine
We went to the oak grove
Secret and sacred the place to me
I saw something not right then
I felt uncertainty

I had taken her to the special place
Where there's a glitch in time
I hadn't thought that she meant evil
Or that the place was mine
I had tended some occasionally
Then she took out the wine
She asked me which was special
As the One I stood beside
I indicated another
Knowing that One must hide

But the one I indicated
Was sapling of the first
It was my child doing the doing
I felt my heart would burst
When she poured the wine along it
And it ran down like blood
I had to walk away then and
I wandered round the wood.
I felt complicity
As no mother should

I walked for a long time
Then circled round to see
What she'd done to those I loved
She was speaking to the tree
I saw her from a distance gaze
Into branches I knew well
I knew that it was wrongdoing
That she'd made some kind of spell
I wondered why she waited
What she'd said I couldn't tell

I went and stood in trepidation
By the One I had betrayed
The summer sun was shining and
It's branches gently swayed
I asked why are we lingering
She said she must hang around
The tree must give a gift to her
But nothing had she found
In sadness I within the grove
On that fairy mound

I looked up to my old old friend
In regret and pain and love
And a tiny twig came to my hand
From the branches far above
I held it and I wondered
What kind of deal she'd done
She snatched it from my fingers
Like a prize that she had won
I told her it was not the tree
Where her magic had begun

Time passed she was successful
All her wishes did come true
But oh my friend how I regret
What became of you
I often went to see you
Often too apologised
Your sapling was so tall and strong
You so vulnerable beside
Black fungus on your branches
I saw there your demise

I had to tell the woodman
One must be taken out
Or we'd lose the whole oak grove
All the trees from roundabout
I went to my daughter
I said the tree has died
I went to where my friend had stood
Where remnants all strewn lie
She said it matters not to me
Afterwards I cried

Although my blood is in her veins
She's no longer friend or kin
I will not speak or smile at her
Or trust in her again

Planets suns moons live and are growing
Until they burst and form anew
I knew that diamonds are alive before It happened
In class I obstinately argued

Cats have nine lives not nine near misses
It rains cats so could rain horses too, and dogs
Ask any wanderer they'll tell you
It absolutely definitely rains frogs

Speaking of green there were two children
Appeared and by a village taken in
Being taught to speak and then questioned
Where had they come from as they had green skin

If all the people disappeared
It may be a moment of distress and tears
Then they'd reappear after a storm
Lightening crashing new hominids unborn

But if the world ended as Mars did
It would need watering

When I was laid in the white place and the giant fly came
I was a tiny thing and it came close to look at me
I wanted to hide and made myself smaller
Then another one came and they fought
Rolling over and over
My first memory laid in a pram outside

She sat me on the table and went outside
I saw her look through the window as I fell

I ran across the room and couldn't stop
So I ran into a chair
Because I knew I could stand up holding on to it
They all shouted in delight at my first steps

Leaning over the side of my pushchair
I watched the wheels on the muddy path

I was running looking up at the blue sky
There were pink flowers against it

She left me alone in the garden and went out
She took my sister in her pram and I wanted to go too
She said I had to stay in the garden
I stayed and I saw a plane fall out of the sky
I cried that the pilot might be hurt
She said I'd made it all up because I'd had to stay behind
At breakfast dad in his vest put the paper on the table
In front of me with a picture in it
Did he die? I asked
Yes he said
But it wasn't in the direction you pointed

I pulled a **** from paving stones
Out of compassion I planted it
It grew into a mass of beautiful blue flowers.

Who is to say why the rain seeds where  it does

I stood while frogs fell from above
A woman said that now and then
They fall and go to a pond on the field

Within the huge infinite mind
Of cosmos fractal wide alive

Is all that is

All who live one mind,
Friend and foe,
All the lives ever lived
Yes even those
Who went back to the Source

When all wake up we will see

That seeds from above put us here
That seeds from above are why
It rains Cats and Suns
Dogs and Frogs
Lobelias Planets
You and I too
When we were the first ones

I had flown over Yugoslavia
While children lived and played
Returning, after their war and shame
We went a different way.

I hadn't seen their faces
Or known of their plight
I had been to another place
Which this poem is about

On an island of gods
In a sea of rich blue
I heard the loud chirruping
Saw no-one fight

Distant flashes of bombs
Over sea in the night
I was told were men fishing
With dynamite.

Oblivious I, while they died o'er the way
Treading gently the path
To see the cicadas
I sat down for a day

I sat on a rock in the scorching sun
Elusive they hid in my blindness, so near
A day and a day I sat on the rock
Patient, I sat, transformation begun.

As I became rock and my hair became clouds
Oleander my clothes and grasses my bower
I saw them, so close, mist had dissolved
Grasshopper faces and love for each other.

In time there was a moment when I saw god and loved
In time there was a moment when I saw the other and died
I walked in the otherness and in the grey formed again a world around us
I hope it isn't all my fault.

How many have seen the black in black eye
The eye that takes you in
It transports to their place
Stopping time outside hours pass in a moment
Who has been absorbed
By the mind of the other
Where the old young timeless sees your naked soul
Where the test is ultimate
Where fear means nothing
Beyond death in that place of life
Time is truly one moment
Fleeting glimpse of eternity
Then cruelly places you back
Among the blind in Maya
Who destroy you for speaking

Outside of time there was time
Outside of space there was space
Rolling out my scroll the other
Selecting access point
I pushing forwards, to see
The other tutted.
Inside the eye
In greyness I
Pushing inwards to know
I was ejected
To find my own way home.

If you go after leading me here
There is a vacuum, an empty place
Because I can't call to you if you aren't there

I would read those words over
As I did, looking for the meanings
They are gone
It's like a song being forgotten

If you go and leave us to predators
My own words are empty
Only having life if you read them

Look at the sky and remember who you are.
It's positive and natural to be down,
how else could you know what up is?

Logic dictates that if there is one immortal
Then all of us are immortal, as we are all one mind
This includes the others
Not only those of our kind
In energy, no dissipation
It can only reform, travel another path
So for those who lengthen their span, increase assets
Creating inbalance, I will say
We will all meet again another day

In our world of pavements our fictions of mind
There are others around us who've left us behind
We have transient memory, blinkered and blind
Out of touch with reality - other earth kinds
Brother bear, brother bee, sister fox, sister bird
All cry to us constantly silent unheard
We're tight as a spring that needs to unwind

Our sweet images play and the transient pass
We see only reflections of things in the glass
Futures appear fleeting shadows surpass
The feel of bare toes in the dampening grass
Caught in the net we see through the holes
Creators of moment the futures untold
Unprepared and unmoving and caught off the path

War is profit for some
It's loss for all.
There is catastrophe waiting
By remains of their wall

The web that we share
The warm nets enclosure
Of friendship and sharing
Is almost over

How blind in our friendship
Love and peace flowers
Mistakes in our sharing
Decay in the bower

We opened the door
Sharing to commerce
Internets over
We let in the worst

In my accidental garden
There's a eucalyptus tree
I had to chop it down
Then it grew again for me.

There are pieces of it's body
Standing all around
They have a sort of beauty
I don't sit on the ground.

There's wisteria in flower
Twisted round the climbing frame
By the door a bright red acer
Trimmed to stop the drips of rain

Honeysuckle rambles
I confess there's brambles too
Dock and nettle with the roses
Rosemary and Feverfew

There's a dish of cat food
For the feline friends who come
But the dish is empty
And for cats alas there's none

Fearless Robin first to find it
Shared some time with me
Then Mrs Blackbird came
And her husband warily.

I sit on the unformed wood
Beneath the shady trees
With birds all unafraid
And I wonder

Sometimes I think of past lovers
It makes me feel lonely
Then I think of the implications

I wonder what they think
At this exact moment of my thought
Being an optimist
I hope they are all happy
Mostly they were the best, good guys
Fondness in my heart for them all

As for me there's no turning back
Love with it's highs and misery
Love with it's sorrows and guilt

Discarded it long ago
When my lover killed his other lover's lover
I walked away from love

I was washing clothes by the river
With other women laughing chatter
Draping from basket to bushes
It was a happy dream

Came the dream other
Said time to show you something
I was thinking of the other women
With my share of the work

But then

I was lifting slowly upwards
They became smaller and smaller
Into grains of sand
The grains of sand began to move
As a child lifted a giant foot
From beneath.
I saw the child but I was rising slowly
The child smaller and smaller
Into grains of sand
Another scene lifted from the sand
Again, again, then faster higher
Sand on sand,
Each it's own reality within
The other said then
It's like the layers of an onion

I walked away
I left behind everything and fled
There was nothing I could carry
I didn't walk towards
I walked away
My heart was black
I would not die for you
No thoughts of anything except to fly away
I waited for the moment when I could go
No other thought
Nothing else to do
There was no going back

I only took one tiny bell
From the flower, wanted to smell
That scent of the air when I last walked in the sacred dell.

Sitting with Alice, her world and mine
Suns on the water world of honeysuckle
Scent of bluebells

On the page where I pressed it
For some future person to find
Words so that the moment will not be lost in time

"This sweet scented flower
Contains the universe
A droplet of water reflected the sun
In the honeysuckle
While I breathed in
The bluebells.

"I remembered
The layer up
And the layer down
When I was tiny
And when I stood in every place
Reborn, thrice born
I walked from the woodland"

Randomly selected book and opened with chance
Placed it inside,
"Zen Buddhism Reflections for Every day"

Curiosity compels to read that page
So I did and what it said was profound.

Flower crumpled in it's sheath of white paper.
Writing these words, losing the moment
Couldn't find the page to replace it.

True love is always unconditional
Not possession of another being
It isn't ownership of property
There's either love or not no in between

True love is when you always love
Love is light that warms not hurts that sigh
Hormonal crave can't match the feeling
Of that belonging in another's eye

Whatever paths of mind you wander
That which you truly love will be within
Will travel with you never leaving
Warm you with fondness never pain

I stood on the peak at Mam Tor
Back to the Ancient stones
Facing the setting Sun
Toes touched the very edge
I had no fear no vertigo
There was a path of red gold
To the shining Golden portal
I felt if I stepped on that path
In that burning light
I would not fall
Spirit surged ahead across
To the gold and red planet
Then I turned away
A walker below tiny mote
Exerting to share that moment
Or perhaps to catch me as I fell
Too late
Paths crossed on my descent

Wide awake in a dream.
It was a bright stadium.
Wide empty lanes of the perimeter
I felt there were some within

A girl rushing, couldn't stay
Spoke to me urgently
"Meet by the Water Tower"

I wandered aimless there were none
To ask the way,
I came upon the edge of moorland
A hill that rose away,
Above, stretched flat on rising *****

Grey stones
Laid together close, as game of tiles.
I could stand on one, both feet

Walking along the bottom edge.
I picked up the left cornerstone.
It was large, heavy carrying at first
Brushing off clinging earth,
Seeing the shadowy shapes engraved,

Went to find the Water Tower.

In the stadiums lanes of white, forlorn,
A woman came to me in uniform
Asked of my purpose.
I told her my plight, she sat me in her car
I looked up

High above.
Shining translucent white container, a tank;
Generating power, suspended along cables and
Containing water.
I wondered at this,
Then she brought a sort of bike
Said "I'll take you now"
Riding pillion both hands holding stone
Thought "I'll surely fall"
As we banked

It was so fast, colours a-blur
Long, far, perilous, vast distance,
When we stopped, she turned.
Alone
Abandoned on the moorland
Rough ragged tufts of grey, green grass,
Forever each way, in mist faded substance

I know this place but I am lost,
The moorland has no directions
Standing so with the cornerstone
Now heavy
Rough, heavy as a world's reflections.

Then from the mist striding t'wards
Tall man upright in strange dress, feathers,
Hide, hair streaming weathered,
Coming into focus stands before me greets
Takes the cornerstone and reads it, hard worked hands
Deep blue eyes, into mine and mind, translating:

" We are of the Sz'ip p T'ik k "
There were clicking sounds,
Means the first ones,
" You are to take a message.
" The message is:
" 'To The Survivor of Your People, say this..

" Survive!' "

Then I am pulled away he's gone,
I open eyes.
Repeating words
Reach for my pen

All moments
Ever lived
Are poems
Waiting
To
Be written

You aren't the father of your son
His father is the other
Of one thing I am certain
That I am his mother

He was exchanged in fair trade
For unwilling contribution
They stole my unborn children
Then paid with retribution

Of this I cannot tell you
Or any of this world
The world is all illusion
I saw it all unfurled

He could conquer all of Ireland
He could rule the Egypt land
He could start the Roman Empire
Bury continents with sand

Of this I haven't spoken
To man or god or beast
To friend or foe because I know
What is to be his geist

His geist is told to noone
They told me in my dream
Of a gift ne'er can be given him
Or ne're 'gain will he be seen

So be his father well my love
Give to him your heart
And I will grieve forever
Long long after when we part

Sitting around a fire
Kindred spirits met on that mountaintop
Where the white horses run
A guy came holding his shirt in hand
Overjoyed he'd found wild mushrooms
Field, not the trippy kind
Someone produced a pan
"Does anyone want to wash them?"
"Get them in the pan!"
Plenty for all
Delicious we shared them
Strangers together
In retrospect I understood that bond
The trust in that simple meal

Nameless was my friend from old times
His girlfriend young and lovely
She fell in love with my guy
And my guy killed Nameless

I was lost, realisation, trauma
So bad
My friend of old took me to the coast
It was her birthday and I fell asleep on the train

Half sleeping I, murdered Nameless came
He showed me white stones, big pebbles
Told me to build them by the sea
So that he could be free

We wandered by the sea
I think I spoiled her birthday
I could see no white stones
She went into a shop with the children
I sat on a bench in an old harbour wall

Then, a man with a child came walking by
He pushed the pram, child walked in front
Child was carrying a huge white pebble
Walked to me and threw it on the ground
At my feet

They passed by
I picked up the heavy pebble and looked around
Friend and children said where was it from
I said I don't know they came this way
We backtracked to where the heavy tides wash against the seawall

Carried them in our arms to the point where sea darkens sand
Built a hollow tower
A child wrote goodbye in the sand

Sitting until the sea came and washed it away
No-one touched it
Not even dogs
Not the seagulls who circled it
When it had gone I knew I had freed him

The vet said Sully had reached the end of his life
She helped him pass on, I buried him in the garden.

Before it came to that, I had been sitting outside
Sully had his favourite place, he was dying and he was smiling
I said to him that if he had to go, it'd be nice if he came back

A while after it rained - not the light and gentle feeding of grass
This was a deluge that caused people to stand and stare in wonder
That so much water could ever have stayed up in the first place.
Thunder shook the foundations of the world, sky was ripped apart

In the road outside a kitten appeared, walking in circles
Jack from down the street brought him to me
I called him Sully McNimbus.

When Sully McNimbus was run over, the vet did the same
And again, Jack brought a kitten found outside, walking in circles
A girlcat, I looked into her eyes.
It had been raining
I call her Storma

Confucius never had his day,
But he attracted a unicorn;
Why didn't he escape society
To preserve reality?

This grove is my sanctuary

The air is clean

Only the wild things and I

And the fairies who live here

My friend the tree stood here

I wept for it

But I'll tell you about the tree


Once Jan and I came here at dawn

I for the peace him to make love to me

We laid together under this tree

I was looking up into the branches

I knew they were there but he didn't know

It began as a few drops of water on my face

I giggled, he thought to him

Then it was a deluge

Rain almost, much more than dew can do

On naked skin

Jan jumped up dragging on his shirt

Freaking out because

It only rained under the tree

Nowhere else


The tree is where I first met the others

Face to face when they tricked me

Caught me like an animal being tagged

I in fury following because they stole my child

They in joyful testing games of peril

Let us go again

Took us to the rainbow bridge to walk from there to home

Bond of immortal love

Stronger than emotions

Transcending life and death

When my universe expanded

Find for me a forgotten place
Haunted only by creatures of the wild
A retreat to rest in where the stars will shine forever
Overgrown, untended where dead may walk in dream
Unsanctified, cast out and long forgotten
By all but those who live unknown by man
With tangled growth of unnamed flowers uncounted
In seas of grass the rough hewn stones between

I flew with Steve from this island to another

Cicadas greeted us with singing, I felt a welcome in my feet
Then while Steve went into an old abandoned monastery
For a ***
I sat on a wall covered in tangled fruit and flowers
And a big brown beautiful creature walked up to me went past
Disappeared into the trees
I told Steve and he stamped and screamed
On my first visit seeing what he wanted to see

He went off with some woman

I slept in the open under a tree full of spiders
Lightening bounced sideways above
Sang to the sea till the sun shone
People shouting at scorpions by night
Sang and laughed with them by day
I gazed into the oleander
Drank water from a temple spring
Stood on one foot on a cliff edge over blue sea
Washed my hair with the water snakes
Sat on a stone for a day till grasshoppers gave up
And allowed me to see them
Made friends with a big brown bee
Danced naked on the sand

Flew home again with Steve

There was no war, or warning
"Stay inside" they said.
There was no reason
Only a cold and empty mercantile explanation
There will be no justice
There's no compassion
Not a single tear or token of genuine kindness.

Gave brave men inadequate tools
Leaving them to take the remorse
Helplessly watching London burn.

They say how awful
And retreat to comfort, homes of luxury
Thinking, that the poor are forever present.
They will make plenty more.
Behind the door they sigh and say, "How tired I am today"

How can they sleep?
My heart is broken

How can they not weep?
How offer a token?

Not a thought for the orphans whose parents tossed them into the unknown
Casting away ideas of burning flesh that was their own

Not having you to hold,
I hope you're equally cold.

The patterns of earth
Like the patterns of a small fractal - part
Of Pi dimensional universe
And
Lots of patterns we haven't seen yet;

Like a field full of mist with dew
Spider webs in a misty field.

Green is the middle colour of the rainbow
The bridge to the other worlds is a rainbow,
And so the path is green.
The middle path.
The straight path.
Many feet make a path.

The light from the eyes of every living thing is the same.
The consciousness you feel is all one.

We are like reflections of the Moon in a pool.
Each ripple,
Each droplet,
Holds the same moon.

All that lives contains the same essence of life,
Every tree, every cell, every animal, every insect, everything alive.
The essence is no more and no less in anything.

Reality is not what it seems.

I met a bee who carried a leaf.
It held it tight in it's little feet.
It skateboarded down from the sky to me.

When meeting a creature of any size
If it's not the same species, look in it's eyes.
Feel it's thoughts as they flit through your mind.

If everything is in the mind,
Living thoughts materialise