It's not an idea, it's
    a concept. No,
  It would take too long to explain
       It, it is too difficult because
            It only exists when it is
               Visible and without it, it's
                          Impossible to see
    What is it?
                        It is important.

As it turns out you're
      not the only one to think
                              like you do, there
           are scores of others whose
             thoughts wander the same roads
                  with poppy fields and
                        no speed limits

Who am I
                     if I cannot
                      bring myself to realize the
                      nature of the word

I know you.

Who am I?

The mango erupted in
           peels of laughter
    reduced to orange pulp
        and noise as we looked on
   with barely suppressed
                                     hunger

It's not very hard to see where you've been
Just follow your footsteps through every trash can
And pick up the dust and pack up the sins
And leave so I'll find my way home

life is suddenly
blatantly
impossibly



clear.

Don't let them boss you around
       or let me try to influence your decisions
   thinkers don't play roles
                             others set out for us

  People like me make their own
            

             I will not settle, and,
        for a little while there,
                                        neither would you.

Enter night
  the first nights
        we wanted to die
    but we didn't and
  discovered ways to hold on

Enter night
  win grin night
          we rolled around and fell
    with purpose

Enter night
     crazed bonding night
  we ran from the cops
    and cried together

Enter night
   no reason night
      you left and I indulged
initially to cope

Enter night
  tonight
     I indulge
         for the sake of indulging
   and I'm reminded of us

Prepare to feel better and worse than
                You've ever felt before
      It's not easy, at times you will seem
                                          Completely and
                                                       Utterly
                                                                                                                                                                 alone
                              But there are the other times, times
                                  a unique sense of belonging warms
                 you up from your very core because
                                                                                                     no two people share the same love, it
                                                                                                      is a creation they each pour
                                                                                                             their hearts into, and life
                                                                                                     is hard so love is too
                                                                                                                      and at times you won't
                                                                                                 know what to do but
                                                 in the end it's
                                                          alright
    


                                                                   In the end it's alright

Gentlemen, treat the ladies with respect
         Ladies, return the favor

In disguise when
                  surrounding people boast inflated
   concepts of importance
        
          If they cannot recognize me
                      when I change, how
             will they recognize my ideas after
       I am gone?

I watch as you take a
       flying leap into the water
  sinking down three, six, twelve feet
             eyes closed, crinkles of concentration
           at last reminded to follow your bubbles to the surface
     and wave excitedly

When was there ever something to talk about?
                          I cannot recall an instance
        in which I, you, we voluntarily
                                     downed a conversation
                 without any gagging after the fact.

Look where you want to be
              consider it
  
         what are you still doing here?

Just look in her eyes
          she doesn't mean a thing

     you and I both should
                       pack up and get out
                               or we'll snap

I'm a night owl when I think
           usually I sleep soundly when I don't

Don the mask it's
    time to go

soon we won't have to play this game
                          anymore

Evenings of black rubber
       and silky piano with
                   four-part choir harmony

Evenings of
           flickering candles
      chicken parmigiana
                an introductory salad

Evenings of  
                         cello sighs
                        champagne lies
                                               sunsets

               fade slowly to morning
                     every time

Your words
                    pressed flat against cobblestones
        What's that behind them?
                                 slinking about in the
                                                             shadows?
Catch it
    Catch it, almost got it this time but
                     it broke my net, shook off my
                            traps and fled my
                                                 mind's garden

                   better luck tomorrow.

Cheeks upon faces I fail to remember
By red walls that shimmer, set back in the dark
How trivial is laughter, how plain its acquaintance
When speech in itself fails to hit the true mark

I wish I were born as a small bit of plaster
That I'd patch a hole in the side of your heart
To live as a part of you for ever after
And grow old and die without drifting apart

[Return to forgotten ideals
      Keep writing for as long as
                                                  it takes
                      to fuel the fire
                                    build the walls
              I'm beginning to doubt this act
                  accomplishes anything but
       It makes me feel better, it
                  makes me feel, it
                        makes me
           continue my nonsense like
                      so many of you
    explanations, accusations built
                        from the same blocks
                              such variety within
                                                    rigid boundaries]

My vision is flickering
       which is strange

                   I want to be an artist
                                     a musician  
                                                      ­                no
                      I am an artist
                                     a musician
                             and what I want is
                                             to be able to share that with the people
                         to laugh and cry and live and die with you
                           to inspire you to take risks every now and again
                            to guide you
        
My vision is flickering
            but allow me to correct myself

    I'm perfectly content

Your path is of your choosing
   and what happens next is up to us.

I'm better on my own
I'm best on my own
   It's best to be on your own
     I'm better on my own

Explosions in the sky
Rip apart the shreds of thought I so
Desperately struggled to gather around myself

More beautiful than fireworks' light-hearted
Sighs, these demon waves penetrate
My ribcage, throttle my heart

Lights, lights, the unknown maestro
A landscape plagued by hiccups

[Doll]

I wish I could speak these
Lips will not move I am
At the mercy of all who know me

At least you will crumble I
Endure fur hundreds of years
Forgotten and alone with
My thoughts

I am locked in a porcelain mausoleum.

[Orange]

It's nice to meet you I
See you're smiling am
I funny?

We only have a short while before
I must go so let's converse let's take
Advantage of this new friendship why
Don't you say something?

Your hair is well-brushed I must
Say you look exquisite

I guess I'm alright for an orange

[Orange]

Plastic eyes cannot see me
Plastic ears cannot hear me, plastic
Tongue cannot taste me

Bitter rind is protection
For sweet tangy juicy but
Plastic does not benefit cold
                   Dry air inside

We both are almost alive, I
am dying while you project life's
Illusion for reasons best left unknown

I will rot before I gather dust.

Up the hill
                  drawn fresh from a well
           Fire bubbles over the bucket rim
                  and all is still once more.

Sometimes the very act of putting
                   Something onto paper
                                        Is in itself
                                         A way of
                                            Letting
                                                   Go

The air in this room is






                                     heavy.

It's hard to think with you here
It's   to     with     here

The eraser came before the pencil
                          Mankind wanting
                            To purify its slate
          Long before anything was written

   The pencil a justification
                after the fact

Everyone wants to
                           box things up
                 Seal it all behind zippers
       and buttons and clips and plastic wrap

         In the hopes that what is
                               inside the box is
                In some way better than what
                                             Exists outside

Early mornings
          with broken suns
   sloshing about in the sky

                  a good start.

People use pictures when they can't
                                   find the words
And photographs when they can't
   hold on to them

Why are some things labeled

                                                  TRASH

   and others passed on to grandchildren?

Who else has the time to
       Spin for an hour in the entrance to
       a national bank?

Our system
        designed to hold open
                                                                                       any door
for 3.6 seconds before
    
   s
    w          ng
       i        i              shut with
         ng                                a resounding

               whisper

All this talk of destiny when
        What I want right now
                        Is a sandwich

It's nothing special

Only smoke and
                             mirrors | srorrim
        most of the time


            
                          Except when it isn't.

Squish down below the
                                  filmy line
                    Eyes buckled, buttoned

Snap          
                          ped in half

            to achieve a  
                             tepid calm
                              
                                        is all

trails of smoke in the night sky
      where are we?
  the occasional glimmer of stars through the curtain
       it doesn't matter where
    each flower
       keep the pedal down
    a rainbow on your pillowcase
       *we are now.

I'll build a place for you
    with **** carpets.

Hey there
              fish fry hey there
muscle goose hey there
       red hair atop a plastic horse that
     spins in endless circles

Hey
     there
   in-between the trees don't you see it it's a
       cloud but floats higher it's a
               great puff of white, so distant it
          must be someone's forgotten dream
  set free to wander
                  
      hey
   there it goes, oh here it comes no
        don't feed it or it will stick around give it a
  good kick in the ribs like this see?
            he won't be coming back

******* these
   ******* words these
                      ******* words are
all I have
             what?
letters on a page, not even a real page anymore, you've made sure
of that always accessible and easier to be online with things
   digital and cold

What did I think talking could change I
        preach the power of words and let them fall short
  stumble over each other in a race to get out of my throat

We'll change the world, sure think of a way to do that tomorrow could
I get back to you then I don't want to think about the process let's please focus on
The end result that might not happen but who cares, what is happening really and what is
For that matter we all could be ants I'd really like to go to Mars and discover how we began the
Human mind why would we want to learn about that it's not like we'll live forever let's just make ourselves
Happy so we don't have to plan for the future and then we can go drift like seaweed, forever free and
Weightless

Crazy talk.

Blasted folklore.
Blasted rock.
Blasted candles.
                         ganged up and
blasted me.

Rioter.
              Look in the mirror.

Is this the way

      you

            want to make a difference?

I'm almost at the point where I can
Forgive you for how badly you've hurt me, but
We can't I don't You
Can't pretend like it never happened


that's even worse.

If we had our way, hidden lives and loves would
                                 up out of the ashes in which we
                    g                                           ­                   live
                n  
             i
        r
    p
S

                                                     So build me a staircase that

     retches           your
   t             u     to        be
S                  p                 au
t                                       t
   r                                   i
     a                              f
       e                         u
         h                     l
           -                 -
             g            b
               n       e
                  i   a
                    t
                        
and leave the love bit
                                  wrapped up between the
           two
          of us
                           like a warm sock on chilly winter toes

You've left a hole
                             (In case you didn't remember)
  With no darkness left inside

             A bright hole - unlike any other

that engulfs me as I light four candles on a rock
        and think for forgiveness
   and rise with the smoke

                                                                ­    because we all want to drift away and
          singe our faces in the aftermath

It's criminal
               to bear witness to this startling beauty
         of red, orange, purple
           the natural painting that creates itself each night
                                                           ­                                                                 ­                                  alone