The stories I've written about you.
The unrealities I've imagined about you.
The person you say you are.
The parts of you that you hide away-or try to hide away from me.
The "I love you" and "I'll be a better father from now on"
The bottles laying around in your apartment.
The muddled words and swirling of thoughts and feelings.
Empty promises of sobriety fall on deaf ears and a stone cold guarded heart.
Father.
..Father.
Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.
But you are a father before all of that.
You are my father.

M~

It's been a couple weeks since the two year anniversary of your death. I just wanted to let you know that I'm doing okay. Better than okay. I'm happy and my life has meaning. Soon I'll stop hearing your voice in my head and seeing you everywhere. But right now, I'm ok with writing you letters and talking with your ghost.
Take care of yourself and I'll see you in good time.
All my love,
Sammy

I've never had the strength to look past your mistakes and give you the space for improvement and growth.
I'ma be walking across that stage in  few months and I want you there.
I want you in my life right now .
Please don't make me regret trusting you and believing in you again.

Give me a year to heal and get back to myself.
Time is what we need right now.
I hope you're doing okay.
You asked for the space and time to heal.
I'll give you that and more.
So take care of yourself.

She'll go back to the trees.
Back to where she felt the safest.
She'll give everything to keep living .
But this time, she's not giving anything because she's not getting what she deserves.
And with that, she smashed through the wall that she put up to protect her from something that she didn't need protection from: herself.

Let it go. Really. Actually let it go and walk away. If you keep holding on when there's nothing left to hold on to, you'll only hurt yourself in the end.

Everybody wants a voice so they can be heard.
Out in the crowd, there's a kid who just wants their parents to listen.
Everybody wants to be known as their own individual being.
Out in the crowd, there's a kid who wants to be validated by their family.
Everybody wants to be told that they matter to someone.
Out in the crowd, there's a kid who just wants someone to love them.
Everybody wants someone to tell them that they are worth living for.
Out in the crowd, there's a kid who just wants to be why someone's alive.
Everybody wants someone to not forget them after they die.
Out in the crowd, there's a kid who just wants to be remembered and not forgotten or left behind.