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Sam Conrad Dec 2013
Do you even know what its like
I'm suffering
Sam Conrad Nov 2013
Some people say
Don't let things get to you
Don't let them bother you

But really people mean
You're blowing things up
Don't blow things up

They mean to be
Tolerant and accept things
Welcome bad things in

Because without bad
There would be no good
Neutral would be bad

They didn't mean
Instead of tolerance
Kick it until it dies
Sam Conrad Nov 2013
I'm wrecked
What just happened
Why is the a-pillar of my car under my left shoulder
Why is there glass in my face
Why can't I move my legs
Why is the car upside down
Why is it on fire
Why is my forehead bleeding into my eyes
Pretty cool
Sam Conrad Nov 2013
Truth is
I'm afraid of heights
I have that sinking feeling
Like you get before drop on a rollercoaster
But I'm not strapped in
My stomach is ramming itself up my throat
My eyes are watering
I'm making this face like I'm so absolutely terrified
The people look like ants
I'm about to go splat
I'm afraid
Sam Conrad Nov 2013
How does one win
When he is losing everything

How does one speak
When tragedy leaves him speechless

How does one vent
When he can't even speak

How does one move forward
When he is being pushed backward

How does one live
When he is suffocating

How does one breathe
When he has so many problems

How does one cry
When he has no more feelings
Sam Conrad Nov 2013
Every time I read what you first said to me,
I get so ridiculously confused,
Because you already knew I was talking to people,
You knew I'd been
Getting help from the people I'd been talking to.

I said it to your face on a Friday evening outside the building,
When you and I talked about everything,
"I'm talking to Person X and she's helping me a lot"
"I've been talking to Person Y too, she seems to understand"
You went inside to give Person X a hug for "doing a good job"

Unprompted, a message:
"Hey, it's me. I've been told that you keep messaging my friends and
I haven't had the heart to message you back. You need to move on from me."

Let me tell you something,
What you did was horrible.
If your message was warranted, okay
But it wasn't, like I don't know what the hell you're believing
"I've been told that you keep messaging"

What bull, who did you hear it from?
MY OWN MOUTH? WHEN YOU KISSED ME?
How great of you to move on and protect your friends, the ones you said "Feed you sh*t"
What the hell were you protecting
The chance that I'd start feeling better?

I found a huge friend in Person X
I'd been friends for years with Person Y.
Everyone else had jack squat to do with you
Except that girl that works with you
Who I asked to tell you "HELLO" and that "I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL"

Who were your mysterious friends
Those friends I "kept messaging"
Why did you treat me like
I was annoying all your friends
Because what hurt me more than you

Was that you acted

Like I'm a liar
Sam Conrad Nov 2013
I don't know
Why I care about you
Because everything I thought I know about you
Are turning into lies

But they're not lies to most
They're lies to me
Because you're treating me differently
Like I'm not the same

Maybe I'm not the same
But I'm not trash either
It hurts being thrown away
Because I care a lot about you

I don't know
Maybe I'm just crazy
But I don't know why you're hazy
When it comes to everything you say to me

I tell you I love you
And I really do love you
But you don't even care enough
To respond to me

I'm not saying I'm in love
I'm not in love
But I see you're in pain
Pain I swear wasn't all my fault

I know I'm at fault
But please won't you listen
I'm not the same guy
Who caused you to do this?

What do you know that I don't
"I've been told that you keep messaging my friends"
Does not compute
I have no idea where you were coming from
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