This world is perverse
Sickos run everything
People feed their hungers
With the most immoral things
****
Whips
Pain
******
Hating
Killing
It's sick
Disgusting
Perverted
It seems as if
No one can control themselves
Anymore.

An ******* is someone that is hated by everyone
An ******* is someone that is loved by everyone
An ******* is someone that has everything
An ******* is someone that wants more
And more and more and more and more
An ******* is someone that gets more
An ******* is someone that can get anyone
An ******* is someone that makes you tear down        
   your fortress of protection
An ******* is someone that makes you build
    bigger walls in the end
An ******* is someone you would do anything for
An ******* is someone that doesn't appriciate it
Point is, you're an *******
And you disgust me

I stand tall
I am big
I am strong
I am the Eiffel Tower
The Statue of Liberty
The Great Wall
I stand tall
Taller than you all
I am big
I am strong
Because I know my flaws

You disappoint me
They disappoint me
We disappoint me
I disappoint me
Nothing is ever right
No matter how hard we try
The amount of effort we give
Will end up being pointless
So I don't try anymore
People ask me why
Why? Why? Why?
They say, why did you stop?
They say, you were so good
I say, you didn't think that back then
I say, I was never good enough
I say, so there's no point anymore
At that moment my heart tells me,
A piece of you just died

I don't know you
You don't know me
We don't know each other
Yet we do
Somehow,
Some way,
We are connected.

Let's be honest
You don't really like me
   Do you?
     I'm just a **** buddy
      Aren't I?

Let's be honest
I don't really like you
  Do I?
   You're just my **** buddy
     Aren't you?

Lets be honest
I know my feelings
  I fell for you hard
   But let's be honest
     How do you feel about me?

You just continue to surprise me
Don't you?
You can't even be faithful to your new girl
Can you?
She deserves better than you
Doesn't she?
I guess you just don't give a **** about either of us
Do you?

Let's make a difference
For the good
Let's protest for
The environment
Gay marriage
End the war
Let's sing for
The homeless
The unfortunate
The children
Let's inspire
The Addicts
The Depressed
The Dreamers
Let's make a difference
Let's make the world
A better place

I hate the way
Some people look at me
Like I'm some disgusting thing
Like the sight of me makes them want to puke
Out all their narrow-minded, egotistical leftovers
They look at me like I'm some unknown creature
From deep within the most taboo places
They look at me like I'm a
Disgrace
Disappointment
*****
*****,
Filthy,
Disgusting
****-up
But maybe they have every right
To look at me that way.

I pick petals off
  Brown flowers as the charcoal
Clouds hide the sun, I'm
   Lost in endless corridors
Filled with whispers of nothing

You walk in the door
It's a normal day
You're lips turn upward
In the smallest of smiles
Your heart is racing
Your thoughts are going everywhere
This is the day
This is the day you've been waiting for
This is it
This is the day you ****
Today you **** everyone
Your inner psychopath comes out
You pull out your gun
And you shoot
Until there's no one left
Then you take yourself
Because you think that's what your supposed to do
You were crazy
A crazy person with a gun
A gun you should've never had
But the gun didn't **** the people
You did

One day you walk in
Tight, light jeans
Flip-flops
T-shirt that goes against the Establishment
Your eyes sparkle
The corners of your lips turn upward
You stare
Our eyes meet
You come closer
You hold me tight
You push my long, black hair out of my face
Our eyes meet again as you stroke my face
With delicate fingers
You slowly lean in
Our lips touch
And fireworks go off
Then black
Nothing but sheer black
And I remember
That you're not real
That I was just dreaming

I want to go to Wonderland
I want to drink tea with the Mad Hatter
I want to talk with the Cheshire cat
I want to take down the Red Queen

I want to go to Neverland
I want to swim with the mermaids
Run with the Indians
Fly with the Lost Boys

I want to fly away
Just you and me
I want to create a new land
The most magnificent one ever made

I'm gonna leave this godforsaken town
I'll hitchhike out west
To California
To the beach
The infinite ocean
Doesn't know who I was
It gives me the opportunity
To a clean slate
Oh god how I need that
I'll get to start over
I'll leave the past behind me
And I'll look forward to what lies ahead

These places
These events
These things
Cloud my mind
And the fog won't let up
This thick fog,
Full of narcissism and anger,
Reek of *******
That tries to hide me from beauty
The beauty of the thought that I could actually
  be my own person some day.

Kurt Cobain
Well-known name
Well-known face
Well-known voice
Well-known story
But
Not a well-known soul
A smart,
Intelligent,
Determined,
Self-hating soul
A sad, sad soul
Who's pain and anger and sadness
Caused him to make the most permanent decision
A person can make.

You run up to me in the hall
  Ask me what's up
    I begin to reply, but
      I see you run
       You run up to her
       And that reminds me of my place
      I am your confidence
     I am your will power
    I am your support
   I am your friend
But that's all
  You still lead me on
    You still claim you have feelings for me
      You still bring up the things that we once did
        You still say that I'm beautiful
          You still make me feel special
            But I hate you so much
           I hate your love and affection
          I hate the way you treat me
        You treat me like ****
      But this is all a lie
    I only hate what you make me do
  I only hate that you make me love you

You finally did it
You finally pushed all my buttons
Got on every last nerve
Pushed me over the edge
You just love to see me in pain
No, wait
No you don't
I don't even matter that much to you
I'm just the toy at the bottom of the chest
You'll only play with me for a little while
Then you'll throw me aside for another toy
A better toy
And no matter what
You know I'll never leave the chest
You know I'll always be there
Always be waiting for the off chance
That someday I'll be your favorite toy

My legs are smooth.
My arms are smooth.
My lips are smooth.
My personality is smooth.
Smooth and sly
Like James Bond as a cat.
I can steal too
Like the man who stole the moon.
With my specialties
I could easily take you over.
I could sneak up behind you,
Like a sly, sly dog,
Trick you with the smoothness of me,
And steal everything you own,
Including your heart.
I guess you could say
I'm just that sneaky.

You're a quiet one I bet
One who keeps to himself
One who looks at the nightmares
That haunt your past
We're different
You and I
Different pasts
Different personalities
Different souls
But we are equal in greatness
We feed off each others words
And help each other be the poets we can be.

I'm here
In my house
By myself
I'm planning
Planning my escape
As I sit here
Listening to the Ramones
Drinking the night away
Im planning my escape
My escape from this town
My escape from my past
My escape from you
My escape from me

This is insanity
We're so young
Yet we do such old things
We shouldn't be doing this
It's immoral
It's disgusting just to think
That we actually do this
It's horrifying to know
That we enjoy it so much

I can't trust myself around them
I know I turn into a monster
  Or something even worse
I can't trust myself around you
  I know I'd either *******
   Or ****** you
I can't trust myself around me
I know I just think about the bad things
  And make myself go insane.

I ought to hit you
I ought to kick you
I ought to stab you
I ought to cut you
I ought to **** you
Oh god I want to **** you
I want you dead
I want you gone
Vaporized
But it's not you I'm talking about
Even though that's what you deserve
But I'm talking about someone else
Someone that I've known longer
Someone that I know all too well
Someone that truly deserves this
That disgusting thing I'm talking about
Is me.

Johnny Cash
It surprises me how people my age
Don't even really know who he was
A troubled man
With a troubled life
That created the most beautiful songs
A troubled man
Saved by a girl
A beautiful girl
A troubled man
Who never gave a ****
Who did what he wanted
It's a shame so many people don't remember him
He was truely
Revolutionary

I like being alone
And yet I don't
I like being alone
Because I don't have to pretend
Pretend to be happy
I don't like being alone
Because I don't trust myself to be alone
With my thoughts

Look at her
Straight, autumn hair
Glowing blue eyes
Cute, heart-shaped face
Small, tiny waist
Nice, big ***
Perky little ****
She's beautiful
On the outside
And even more inside
Her humor
Her kindness
Her determination
Her real ness
Look at her
And then look at me
And answer this question:
How the **** am I supposed to compete
With that?

I hope you're having fun
I hope having a wonderful time
A wonderful time with that girl
The girl that you picked over me

No, no I don't
I hope she hurts you
I hope she stomps on your heart
I hope she makes you feel like ****
So that way our feelings can be mutual again

I hope you realise how selfish you are
I hope you see how much I gave up for you
I hope you just see me
I hope I just see you

I hope I get over you
Fast
I hope I realise how dumb I was to believe you
To believe your lies
Your fake promises

I hope I realise my list of hopes
Is hopeless.

This place suffocates me
It wraps its hands around my neck
  It chokes me
   It reminds me
     Reminds me of what happened here
       Reminds me of how I royally ****** up
         Time and time again
           Its hands are still around my neck
             It works for karma
               It's giving me what I deserve
                 It's killing me
                   Because that's what I deserve
                     It's killing me
                       And I couldn't care less

I'm stumbling
I'm grabbing things
I'm trying to hold
But I can't
I'm falling

What's happening?

I look to my left
I see you
With that sinister smirk of yours
I look to my right
I see me wearing the same expressin

Who are you?

There's bugs crawling all over me
They bite my eye sockets
The skies open up
God looks down and says,
" I hate you, you ***** *****. "

Why me?

**** mirrors
They never show me what I want
It always comes out warped
Disoriented
Twisted
I hate it
I hate what stares back at me
A hideous beast
One that should be locked away
Never to be seen
Ever

I've come to see
The beauty in the world
The birds
The skies
The seas
It's wonderful
Glorious
Beautiful
But there's something evil underneath
The war
The crime
The poverty
It's ugly
Hideous
Horrid
But I suppose
That beauty is in the eye
Of the beholder

Thunder claps
Lightning strikes a tree
That grows in the forest of my heart
The storm in me rages
It cannot be tamed
It cannot be controlled
You are so beautiful
And my storm will destroy you
You are so beautiful
And my storm will hurt you
You are so beautiful
Run

I shake and I shiver
My eyes are covered
Blindness
Tears fall from my eyes
Hot, hot tears
Blood is dripping
It falls from everywhere
My brain is fuzzy
Numb
Oh god, not again
I feel it
The pain in my chest
My heart
The swelling
The aching
Oh god not again
Gravity pulls me towards
The infinite nothing
Of a sad, sad forest
Here I will spend forever
Oh god not again.

Explore my mind
Plunge deep within
To each and every corner
Find the horrid,
Disgusting,
*****-inducing
Thoughts that run destructivly thought my mind
See the sickening things that makes up the person
Known as me

Look at what you've done to me
I spend all my time thinking about you   Daydreaming about the possibility of us
I'm failing half my classes
Because I can't focus on anything but you
I can't sleep anymore
Not without pills
Because you've stolen my peace at mind
When I do manage a moment of rest
It's because I've cried myself to sleep
Because of how hurt I am
Thanks for this
Now when I look in the mirror
I stand there and wonder,
" What the hell happened to you? "

I am alone
I am alone
  I am alone
   I am alone
    I am alone
     ALONE
I am in love
I am in love
  I am in love
   NO
I will be alone
I will never love
I will not become weak
      SURVIVE.

I'm drowning
In a vast sea
In a wonderful, wonderful sea of
Smirnoff
It's suffocating me
But I can't get enough
I love it too much
I breathe it in
It sets me free
It frees me of these troubles
Frees me of you
Frees me of me
So go ahead
Be with her
I've got my beautiful sea
It makes me forget
It makes me complete

I think I've finally done it
I think I've finally hurt you
Like you've hurt me

You said, "Let's go to the bathroom."
I said, "Wait, let me get drunk first."

You said, "I really miss hanging out with you."
I said, "I miss not being sober."

You said, "I want to be more than your friend."
I said, "I want to get more ****** up."

I think I've finally hurt you
Because now you know that
You've made me so disgusted with myself
That I can't be around you or me
Sober.

There's a pounding in my temples
A burning in my throat
A gnawing at my stomach
It's happening again
This feeling of misery
I can't take it
I take one more sip
And slip into numbness

In bright lights of the halls
Was the first time I met you

Under the raging sun
Was the first time we kissed

Covered in the blanket of night
Was the first time we gave each other all

In the blink of an eye
Was when I lost you
To her

I lie here
In this godforsaken place
It's cold
It's so, so cold
Cold like the hearts
Of the people here
Please
Wrap me up
And take me away
Take me away to
Where it's warm

I'm so lost
Lost in this desert
Of mistakes and regrets
A year ago
I was in a beautiful place
A lush forest where dreams came true
But not any more
I ****** myself over
And dwindled down to here
A desert made for the miserable
A desert made for all the dumbfucks
A desert made for all the people like me

I need you
I need your kisses
I need your bites
I need your passion
I need your hands everywhere
I need you to explore
Explore my taboo places
I need your smell
I need your touch
I need your taste
I need to see you
I need to hear you
I need you to lie down with me
I need you in my bed
I need your everything
And I need you to know
  I'm not good at sharing

Petals fall to the
  Ground, dead and dreamless and lost
Shameful existence

You come up to me
And you kiss me
It's hard, rough
Then I smell it
The smell of too many drinks
You drag me to the bathroom
You push me against the wall
You kiss everywhere
You touch everywhere
This isn't you
The real you
The you that would normally
  lay me down on a soft bed
The you that would kiss my neck
The you that would be so tender
So gentle
This you is an animal
A monster taken over by alcohol
I know you will leave bruises
I know you will do it again in 10 minutes
I know you won't even remember tomorrow
So why do I not object?
Why do I just go along?

This I *******
I hate being in my right mind
Or as close as I'll ever get to it
There's nothing left in this place for us
This place of monsters and demons
It's too real
So let's go
Let's fly
I wanna go so high
I want you to take me there
Let's smoke until we can't see what's in front of us
Let's smoke until we can't think straight
Let's just smoke
You and me
Flying

Here in solitude
   I watch rain fall in crimson
Apathy consumes

I'm not you're slave
I'm not dress up doll
I have my own views
My own opinions
My own beliefs
I have my own hopes
My own goals
My own dreams
I make my own mistakes
Make my own choices
My own descisions
I'm not a mini you
I'm sorry

I can't believe you would do this to me
What happened to you loving me?
What happened to you saying I was beautiful?
What happened to those love filled nights?
What happened to the sneaking out?
Just to see each other?
Why would you do this to me?
Hurt me so much?
Why won't you come back with me?
Back to the good old days?
How can you not miss me?!
Like I miss you?
How can you be with her?
When you know I'm always there?
How can you not see everything?
Everything I did for you?