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Can you promise me that I'll be a good mom?
That I'll cherish her.
That I'll ask her to look up as much as she can, even if it's scary.
That no one should make you feel inferior.
No one should make you feel any less than who you are and you should never make anyone else feel like that either.
To bring those around her up and never to forget who you are.
To be gentle to those who need it and a strong word when there isn't one.
Do you promise me I'll take pictures of her when she's drawing on the table and to explain to her why that mean boy said those things to her? And that no matter what people deserved to be loved because there is nothing in the world that compensates for love.
Nothing.
Can you promise me I'll teach her to be everything and change peoples lives? To encourage concert- going, loud music, and ***** dishes in the sink. For chipped paint, and mistakes, and unbrushed hair.
To wake her up the smells of comfort, like coffee and peppermint, and make her feel safe.
To remind her not to hide and never regret loving someone.
To never apologize for who you are.
Can you
promise me that I'll never make her feel the things my mom made me feel?
But of course not,
you can't promise me those things.
Just like I can't promise myself I'll be a good mother.
But daughter,
I can promise you I will try.
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
what if i told u
that when i was out and claustrophobically surrounded by people while the music scratched my ears
i was thinkin of u
and how much i liked ur face close
to mine
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
get high
get sad
think about what
we coulda had
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#1
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#1
all i want is to sleep but even he's
watching everything that happens
i could stay up here for a week and
wouldn't feel the difference
realizing everything to feel is real
who cares where it is
i can't close my eyes and it's
haunting me just like you
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#3
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#3
you can only find the sadness in the
song if you're really listening to
it, the heartfelt outcry initially later
secluding into the heart of the
girl, who is truly happy while is never
underneath
I can't believe I made it this far
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#4
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#4
just know that I was in a black void
reaching out for something
and I'm not really sure what exactly I
was reaching for
if it was in the dark
or if it was the dark itself
but I wanted it to be your hand and I
haven't stopped wanting it to be
your hand for always
so I'm sorry I want your hand being
held in mine but I do
I want to clutch your hand in the
warmest way
I want my hand grabbing your hand
to feel like the warmest cup of hot
chocolate in the coldest winter ever
seriously all I ever think about when
we're together is how your hand
would feel in my hand
I'm sorry I'm an ******* and I'm
weird
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#5
 Apr 2014 Roni Shelley
LET
#5
WHEN WE HOLD HANDS I WANT
YOU TO FEEL AS EUPHORIC AS
YOU WOULD IF YOU FOUND YOUR
PHONE WHEN IT WAS LOST
ACCIDENTALLY IN YOUR POCKET
AND YOU COULDN'T FIND IT FOR
A REALLY LONG TIME
Humans are ****** up.
We search and search for the approval of others.
     We coordinate clothes in order to get "that image."
     We make our music selections based on what everyone else is listening to.
     We don't shower because hygiene is so uncool.
     We starve our selves to get concaving clavicles.
     We boast of the ***** and drug abuse in order to appear "hard."
Why?
     Who cares what he/she is wearing if it makes them feel good?
     Why give two ***** if they don't know that band, it doesn't make them inferior or you superior?
     ******* shower, if you don't shower for own personal enjoyment then power to you but because "greasy hair is in" isn't acceptable because I can tell you, it's not.
     Collarbones aren't hot or romantic, the only thing deep about them is the depth, very few people like to cuddle skeletons, maybe necrophiliacs but if you want to cuddle a necrophiliac then good luck to you.
     Being a heavyweight, smoking ****, cigarettes, hard drugs aren't ******* cool. If you do them then do it for yourself and not because you want other people to know you do them.
Riddle me this,
     If we accepted ourselves for the clothes we wear, the choices we choose, the body we've been bestowed, and everything we are, then would we need others' approval?
    Is having an image all that great? Think about it, your image in the mirror, you dissect it until you want to change almost everything about yourself.
    I understand that I am the worst hypocrite of them all because I have yet to approve of myself but that's me. I accept that. Can you?
Contrast is stunning and
My life is the greatest juxtaposition
Depression and anxiety
Drained of energy, bouncing off the walls
Stared death in the face a few times
Victim to the darkest spots in my mind
Suicidal, still living day after day
Stuck here forever, in a world full of grey
 Feb 2014 Roni Shelley
st64
you are in the mist, a grey mist
a beautiful coverlet to the eyes of dawn
you’re standing there, in the mist
all the eyelids fall from lunar spark and come to drape on
my beige undoing of graceful bassoon echoes


in this darkened window frame, I look out
and the beat of life pumps on in the veins of foliage friends


in the mist, all cities are alive in muffled sounds and reaching sighs
why give up so soon?
why give up.. at all?*




S T – 4 feb 14
in the mist, we see what we can.. until it clears.
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