MY STAR

Above the earth and into the sky
Under the dome punctured by stars
On the grass next to concrete, I lie
Trying to hide these ugly scars

I look up, watching comets pass by
They sneak up with their tails of ice
I have always thought, “Am I so nigh?”
So nigh they’re inches near my eyes

Beyond the darkness that is called space
I can see my tiny star’s light
Its radiance captivates me in ways
Ways I’ll never think of tonight

You hide with the heavenly bodies
Are you with the Sun or Neptune?
Oh dear, your beam will make me happy
‘Tis dancing in a happy tune

My star, you look so near yet so far
A thousand miles, a hundred yards
I’m conflicted in this silent war
I only wish to move forward

Deep within my brittle but hard bones
I can hear the pure exhaustion
I wish not to face this all alone
Unless I have my own gumption

So my star, I ask of you this night
Help me ascend towards your place
Will you please get me out of this sight?
Will you stay through this ******* phase?

I know that you are unreachable
You’re millions of light years away
I find your place so comfortable
Not swallowed by the light of day

Can you take me up there beside you?
I’m extending my hands, outstretched
It is one of those chances so few
A thought of escape not far-fetched

ON REPEAT**

It feels like I’m in a loop
Every day, it’s up and down
Still eating that same bland soup
And I’m trying not to frown

I am boxed in this small room
Still thinking of the same thought
“Will I remain in this doom?”
This scathing gloom, I have brought

I try to start my day nice
Striving to make less regrets
But sometimes, they become lies
These motivations I’ve set

All the choices I have made
I begin to question them
For the aftermath won’t fade
And fate, it leaves me condemned

“Oh God, I want to get out”
I keep saying that a lot
Or in some days, I just shout
To help me forget this rot

But this pain I am feeling
This ache, it is on repeat
To remind me I’m struggling
‘Till life makes me take my seat

DEPARTURE

I am counting down the days
Before I reach the end
I’d better prepare my way
Before I start to mend

I have three more sunrises
Three dawns to wake up to
Let’s hope for more surprises
So there will be no blues

But there’s this melancholy
Setting in like a mist
Makes the horizon blurry
There’s less chance to resist

As every second tick by
The sorrow gets deeper
I am not shocked knowing why
I must not be bitter

I have to fight this feeling
Or I’ll lose in regret
Let’s not keep this lingering
Just enjoy ‘til sunset

We’ll aim to feel good enough
A rare goal to attain
We have to make ourselves tough
To attract lesser pain

We’ll make a sweet memory
One with happy moments
Until I end my story
And all becomes silent

Make no more room for teardrops
Only allow laughter
Go all the way to the top
Next stop is forever