I am tearing you apart
You love me
And I frustrate you
More than anything
Is this really love?

I feel betrayed by this body that holds me
This body which is built to keep me safe
To harbour me from life’s storm
To me it is a house
Rather than a home.

I lifted my head as my mind heard tapping
His arms tightened around me
It’s okay
He said through sleep enticed mumbles
There’s nothing there

Nothing will hurt you as long as I’m here.

Do you still think about us in your car?
Do you miss the way we used to talk.

Do you hate me for what I did?
Did you ever hate me at all.

Am I the girl you talk about
when people ask you your regrets?

Did you realise the last time we talked
this was always how it would end?

Are you okay in this big bad world?
Have you found another me.

Do you wonder if I’m in love?
Do you care that I’m happy.

Do you wish that we could meet again
if only to ask all these in person?

Do you listen to our songs?
Or do you prefer the silence.

I think I am suspended in a nowhere place

It doesn’t get better

I hope you treat her differently
I hope you realise being sick in the head is no excuse to treat us like ****

I hope you realise I loved you so much I walked away.

I’m so angry with us
How we played our cards until the bittersweet end.
But more than that, I’m angry I’ll never get closure.
It feels like there’ll be a hole inside of me until the day I die
A hole that craves to look you in the eye and apologise.
A want to go our seperate ways.
And forget each other forever.