I am destroying my body
With every purge I take
And the sickest thing is
I am perfectly fine with it.

that we exist
that we are whole
that we are worthy
that we are accepted
that we are respected
that we are connected
that we are appreciated
that we are of consequence

that we even matter at all...

She will lose herself in a book
and find herself in poetry

She thinks that religion is a sacrilege
and that long showers are sacred

She makes love when she's tired
and never tires of making love

She is irreverent in her humor
and pious in her gravity

She is diligent in completing her work
and ambitious of her quest for leisure

She is the personification of romanticism
and the embodiment of compassion

She exists harmoniously in my mind

She wears a sad smile
Flaunting a ruby necklace of tears
Her sobs are her sweet song.
She tried to cover up her scars
But now they are her bracelets.
There was a time in which
She tried to change herself for others.
But now
This is her new reality.
She knows that she is pretty
It is all because of her honesty.
They say the candid shot is the lovliest
And her candid shot is wry and skeptical
She is a cynical beauty
And she couldn't be happier with herself.

Disappointing you
as only you can see me through
is the only thing I'm mildly good at
I hope if you think of me, you forget that
so I take this razor to my skin
I let myself feel the sting
regretfully, I let this blade
dance it's way across my wrist
my worries start to fade
finally, I have my fix.
in love, in lust, in hate
it carves a phrase
**** up
is what it reads
dear god I miss the old me
the one who would never harm herself
the one who was not a living hell
the one who would never punish a child
for the way her body was defiled
something that was out of her control
but she refuses to let go
so now she falls to her knees
as her every emotion bleeds
from every gaping hole in her body
her tears sting her arm so harshly
for as she loses her will to fight
an angel goes back to heaven tonight.

I long for the slow days

in which the sweat of our problems

drips from our skin

where the water we tread through

washes away our cares

the sun beats down our lingering worries

as we bask in the heat

of the better days