Renard Jackson

Aug 2018

All day I have stayed sitting in the rays
Not stirring or diverting my gaze
On the outside a boring, motionless shell

Inside though...
That is another story I know to well
My brain is starting to swell
Bigger and BIGGER feeling it might explode!
Thought
after
Thought
I am going to implode!
A inner struggle, a constant day dream
Onlookers walk by unaware of my nightmare
Inside my brain
I feel the pain.

Struggling with overwhelming thoughts is a daily problem with Bi-polar and
one I have become all to familiar too.

Renard Jackson Aug 2018

Blue sky

no end like the big blue sky
Dense by shallowness for this life has Force
Conscience of oneself in predicaments that you asks questions
Mind blisters, wanting incredible to gleam impeccable
Chancing what's seems to be one chance
Give to be, although, taking can be the cause of effect
It's all for respect as to it's all for a check
All victory go to God but does the devil deserve an abject
Kids that disrespect from parents that don't "Say it wit ya chest!"
Living to die, shoot for your goal, but don't glutton over success
Induct to fake smiles no cares its been that way for awhile...

Renard Jackson Aug 2018

Asperity

Long years dispute not engage with mortality
.. constant hard to please days and unforgettable nights
Time passes with the past of our condolences
Making more apologies than she notices
Pain has all the control, while anger feeds off that
Asking where are you going?! Though the responds is "I'm never coming back"
Elusively saying things I don't mean believing the obvious respectfully outseen.

"It's either that or me". #life
Remember the good things because the bad or does it all in the end.

Renard Jackson Jun 2018

Fraught

For you I try..
Giving it takes me to a place where I am conclusive.
Taking more than what I giving because understanding I lack there of cause of the events due to the situation as ones trigger.
I tread lightly struck by guilt to react with bitterness.
Though every word is like defense to
the case presented on behalf of the man being accused.
Although right I'm wrong to justify is a confession itself.
Merely to be "One" you must hang yourself to show act of conversed with anything in history.
Questions aren't necessitate
Screened diurnal insist abusive language or insult.
Taunts of dismissal digs indentations
Ditest of the man being you shoot to ****.
Wide-eyed to interesting creatures I'm lured by lust.
Only to implicate myself in to being downsized and crushed.
Talking to be heard decisive of my words choose only to be seen to make my own decision.

It takes just one second to realize what you have before its gone or realize you have nothing at all

Renard Jackson Jun 2018

The ways...

Immediately impact in one's direction
Infection spreading airborne it's a feeling
Bias of understanding in saying
Actions speak louder than words
With life there are challenges and achievements
Dispute none of the two what's done is due
Either it's old or new
No need for fued, miss cultivated
Change comes to those that wait
Introduced by patience
CREATED obligate people revise
Things are consistently explain for the moment momentarily
Immediately impact in one's direction.

#life #choices #tortured