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358 · Oct 2013
Is it true?
Rachel Ueda Oct 2013
Is it true
That if I wish to love you
Eventually I'll loathe you too?

Is it true
All my prayers
Just fill up empty air?

Is it true
Life is a grand game
Only won with the cost of pain?

Is it true
That you are I
And I are you?

Is it true
That the truth
Is never true?
357 · Nov 2014
Blackest of Blues
Rachel Ueda Nov 2014
It use to be the color of the sea
At the surface, it was light as could be
Calm, like the sky, the sweetest high.
Did it make me see or did it make me believe, the difference is so little it's hard to concede its existence without a little futile resistance. Go deeper, go darker, more intense, feels a little starker. This is the middle, where the cat plays the fiddle. It looks like velvet but feels of familiar cotton. Smells just comfortably rotten. You've almost forgotten the color of the sky... Was that really the sweetest high? Here you can't even feel the time go by. It does however, have quite an annoying why It's festers and pesters occasionally but I cage it with my in sane ity. Pulse drops, blood stops. What happened? I was coming up for air and .... I got pulled deeper into its lair. You look around for he who dare make you victim, with boiling anger the beast gets sicker. You want to hear the heart stopper? The jaw dropper? There is no monster. You weren't pulled in, you fell in. You were blind this entire time, why is reality so unkind? Days turn into years, fear forgets those tears. So unsettled, living a lie, the blackest of kettles. You are at the bottom of the ocean, drank Ursulas  potions, thought it was wine ? Now look what you've left behind. The fruit of life has become a rind. Now what? Will you hold onto your breathe and swim to the top, or is this where it stops ?
Feedback wanted !! Thx
348 · Oct 2013
Untitled
Rachel Ueda Oct 2013
You cannot
have light
Without
shadows
340 · Aug 2014
Dear God, Save My Soul
Rachel Ueda Aug 2014
I want to run away
I want to run away
I WANT TO RUN AWAY !!!!!!!

I cant

It's me

I can't run away
I can't run away
I CAN'T RUN AWAY.
321 · Jan 2016
Blonde
Rachel Ueda Jan 2016
Gold streaks
Glittering in the sun
Blinding me

I want to hold her hand
Rest my head on her heartbeat
I want to see her laugh
Make her laugh
I want to kiss her cheek
So she knows it's not just her
Lips I seek

But all I see is gold
Beautiful gold
Running away from me

I want to love her
She makes me feel
Like the person I've
Always wanted to be

Gold
I'm entangled in gold
And I've never been more free
316 · Apr 2015
Fuck
Rachel Ueda Apr 2015
Maybe I love too much
316 · Dec 2014
Just Curious
Rachel Ueda Dec 2014
What's your favorite sound ?
299 · Nov 2014
remember your Me
Rachel Ueda Nov 2014
My heart melts for the
blue sky and sunshine
My nose tingles at
the smell of rain
My lungs fill with the sweet
air of flowers and trees
I am Me

She cringes at sunlight and sees blue skies dull
The rain reminds her to reminisce in the pain
The air makes her lungs feel empty
She is she

People are incredible even in catastrophe
Life is wonderful even when we cannot see
And love dances with hate oh so gracefully
I am Me

People are people
People are pain
Life is pain
As long as you're
a player of its game
Love is a victim of hate
The meek shadow
In its sugary fame
She is she

I am beautiful
A piece of a puzzle
Good and evil
But still the same shuttle
I am both the rainbow and puddle
I am Me

She is ugly and wicked
Rightfully so
Karma for all those she sickened
And when grace falls she knows she will not be ripe for the pickin
She is she

I was once ill
So I took a few
Few more pills
I was once dark
Comfortably so
So I let the roots grow
I was once lost
Buying unfinished maps
At a foolish cost
I was once she
But she was never Me
297 · Apr 2015
You
Rachel Ueda Apr 2015
You
I can't figure out
The right words to
Use for you

I don't know
What you'd be
If marked
As a tattoo

I can't see
You traced on a
Canvas

Or hear your
Heartbeat
in my latest
Melody

It got me thinking
Maybe you are your own
Kind of art
294 · Nov 2015
Growing Pains
Rachel Ueda Nov 2015
Oblivion
That's what I crave
Not death
Not life
Oblivion
Peace

It's also what I fear the most

Ironic

Tell me

Does it hurt ?

Your growing pains?
When you breathe in bright red love only to breath it out again?

Love.

The worst thing to happen to mankind.
And the best.

Love is what I fight for.

Oblivion is what I want.

Bright red, running through our veins
******* growing pains
293 · Jan 2015
For Once
Rachel Ueda Jan 2015
This is me
In all its entirety.

I think God lies
in the flowers and the trees.
Whenever it rains,
I think it's a message telling me, soon, the pain will wash away.
I sometimes stop breathing just to feel death teething.
I always cry when there's a quiet sky and car rides make me feel so alive. People put me in a trance,
I can't tell the good and bad apart.
I think love and hate are joined by the same heart.
The world, that spins a million miles away from me is perfection.
And yet, I sometimes cry at my reflection.
I think love will conquer all, no matter how many times it may fall.
I miss summer in the winter and winter in the summer.
I secretly wish I had many secret lovers.
All I'll ever know is that I'll never know.
And I keep wondering ...is that a enough to keep on with the show ?
292 · Dec 2014
SocIety
Rachel Ueda Dec 2014
I need music to make me cry
And TV to make me numb
I need men to make me smile
And teachers to make me dumb

I need books to escape
I need food to fill the hole
I need silence to keep me sane
And rain to heal the soul

I need money to keep me vain
I need hope to play the game
I need people for the pain

Why do I need me ?
What will I gain?
278 · May 2018
Crimson
Rachel Ueda May 2018
When I close my eyes
I can see his half
Smile half smirk
I can see his distant eyes
That somehow find me

I can hear his laugh
And feel his strength

I remember what life was like
When he was my
backbone
How much I laughed
How tall I felt

When I close my eyes
I can feel his weight
I can feel my heart panic

My skin remembers the trace
Of his finger tips and
And how all I could do was
Freeze in place

The air felt heavy and
My tears so light

Stop.

“It’s okay. I love you.”

Stop.

And then I open my eyes.
I love you too.
I love the version of you I knew
And the version I knew was hidden

I saw your souls and there was black
And parts are unexusable
You’re actions will not be dismissed

In a number of days
The gavel will click
And the metal will swing

But you should know
I loved you so

But it was never okay
275 · Apr 2015
Thought of the day
Rachel Ueda Apr 2015
The thorn
Is still a part
Of the rose
275 · May 2014
One Day
Rachel Ueda May 2014
I know one day I will have to let go
I know one day
I will have to say Goodbye
And day by day I'll tell myself
I'll be ready
That we can just be happy
With the time we have left
But I know that one day
When the goodbyes come
I will cry forever
For the future we didn't have
And smile for the past we did
But the need to hold on
And the inability to let go
Will hurt more than anything
Because that one day
And for all days
I will love you.
An old poem but still so true
259 · Jan 2015
WHAT
Rachel Ueda Jan 2015
Song melts the world away
For you ?
258 · Dec 2015
Nowhere
Rachel Ueda Dec 2015
Come away with me


To the mountains?
To the sea ?

Come away with me


On an adventure?
Somewhere new?

Come away with me
She whispered

To the moon?

She didn't go anywhere
Not to the mountains
Not to the sea
No adventure
Nowhere new
She never even
Tried to touch
The moon

So where to?

Come away with me

In the deepest parts of my love
In the darkest places of my heart
To the endless expanse of thought
To the world inside
Don't move

Come away with me
She begged

To the place you never knew
257 · May 2014
Untitled
Rachel Ueda May 2014
Let the rain come
Let the tears begin
Because I want it all
And will get through it
As long as in the end
I have you
251 · May 2014
To D.M
Rachel Ueda May 2014
I say to you
What I cannot say to
Him
Consider my request.

— The End —