running, raging, store to store
buying, selling, getting more
more and more to give and get
deeper, deeper into debt
false smile here, fake laugh there
****-santa in a chair
"merry christmas, tom and sue!"
what i really mean is, "*******!"
frenzied music fills the air
blinking lights, garrish stars
liquor, beer to soothe the scars
soon it will be over
this mad rush
happy holidays, from this jaded lush!

Always on the surface
just on the edge
ready to spill
over
emotions always boiling
bubbling
churning
strong ocean waves
spinning
coiling
curling
waiting
must hold them in
deep in
hide
protect
so noone sees
always hiding them
so noone sees
my secret

You weave cobwebs
With your smooth words
With your touch and kiss
You hope to wipe away
The memory of how
You chose it over me
And still choose over me
Pursue like a lover
You can't seem to get enough of
And I'm jealous as hell
And sick to my stomach
Disbelieving that
A high means more to you
Than me

your face
in my face
all the ******* time
your breath
in my nose
your hands
on me
your smell
too near
always in my space
go!

You sew a nest of thorned branches
Wrap me tight within
You think I'll stay tied down
Tied to you
You think if you wrap tightly enough
I'll stay
You pick and pull at my fragile down
The tender under-side
You know exactly where to pick
You know if you pry and ***** there
I'll break
You're wrong, though
I look frail, I look weak, I look broken
I'm not
And you're wrong
Underneath those thorned branches
Underneath the prison-nest you wove
My wings are strong
And my wings are ready for flight
And when I'm ready
I'll fly
Far
Away

Metal wire wrapped 'round; barbs and ******
Compressed, depressed breathing
And, and panic
And I tell myself, it will be all right, and I tell myself to just breathe
Breathe deep
I console and cajole
I convince and soothe
I am an iron rod
On my own
By myself
Me

blue-green hiding under a veil of vellum
pulsating and fragile
razor-sharp, sliver of silver
turns blue-green to red
paper white skin
blue-green to bing-red
cascading over white
peace is fleeting
darkness
light