And if i were ever shot ,
id kiss you with the last
breath in my lungs. I'd
apologize for staining
your lovely hands with
my different shades of red.
And before i'd let out my
last sigh i'll tell you how
much i love you before i
die* ~

I notice the light blonde hairs that gently kiss your arms.
And the way your eyes don't flutter,
how they march.
I notice the way your lips curl so mysteriously, so pure.
And the way you are happy on sun invaded days,
And even more joyous on rain soaked days.
I notice how you embrace your words with care, as if they were made up of silver and gold.
And the way you trip people up with your eyes.
I notice.
I notice everything.

I walk with an ache in my heart*
and an unsteady beat
beckoning to be heard
outside of the boundaries of my mind.

I am homesick
for places I have not yet been to.

I walk with exhaustion.
From the lack of surprise that surges through the foundations of my surroundings.
Nothing is new.

Therefore

I am homesick
Aching for new beginnings
And excitement
And the feeling of not knowing.

I am homesick.

I recollect memories of
fear
which surged through my veins,
creating havoc in my mind.
Before relaxing my entire being
I would cover myself completely with my sheets.
In the mindset that if I tried covering myself,
I might save myself from all that lurks in the darkness.

As I grew older.

I recollect the tender feeling of carelessness.
& the boldness that surges my veins, even now.
Before relaxing my entire being,
I make sure to leave my strongest parts out beyond the safety of my sheets,
leaving them vulnerable.
In the mindset that if there is something lurking in the darkness
then hell,
I'll lurk along with it as well.