I may not be the best guardian,
of The Heart,
of yours.

forsaken by those
who failed miserably,
shamefully.

forsaken by those
who keep repeating the same old mistakes,
stupidly.

forsaken by those
who didn't cherish those moments of yours,

the way
how you laugh so perfectly,

the way
how you smile to me, oh wonderfully,

the way
how you make my heart all gloomy,

yet melting like those icebergs in the North Pole
due to the actions of ruthless humans

I  may not be the best guardian
of The Heart.
of yours.

but today, i am here with you
and i am going nowhere
without you.

sorry I couldn't be there
for you whenever
you need a lonely hug,
or a (tantalizing) smile giver
at least.

sorry I couldn't be there
for you whenever
you need someone to hold your hands firmly,
for you to nap your head onto someone's shoulder
trying to forget how cruel the world was - the reality.

sorry for I am the subtle lover,
everyone is scared of craving for
everyone is scared of loving for
their entire life (if they ever live one)
but not you, the only survivor.

sorry for I am the apathetic lover,
trying hard with audacity,
trying hard with tenacity,
in the staggering fight uncovering the pitfall of love.

and it was always for you,
it was always for you,
you,
& only for you it was.

there's something that makes me this way
wandering,
lost,
in a world of our very own.

I can't truly expound it,
but really want to try
maybe it should be this way
& you shall not cry.

and how those clouds hold the rain,
and how the Sun reflects the perfect scenery,
you carefully keep me in vain,
illuminating those image of beauty, auxiliary.

thank you for the days
we shouldn't forget,
gratitude been told
intensely ******.

i don't mind being intoxicated
by the love
-you dictated.

don't ever stop & never cease.
for my love for you will never decease.
and that's a promise
I guess, will forever keep.

Don't say the words
for the sake of,
upholding a glimmer
nevertheless a false hope.

Don't say the words
for the sake of,
holding my hands
while it is raining outside.

Don't say the words, for:
your fond presence,
your deep-meaningful eyes,
your small hands,
your sweet smile,

concluded that the words are no longer needed.
they're nothing compared to
those things
-that can't be comprehended.

Creating the likeliness of
cracking & shattering my heart
as if it was a vase
made of glass.

But
I don't mind,
and yes.
(I need you.)

yes, i know it is a sin
to see you smiling
to see your giggling
and those non-stop laughing

yes, i know it is a sin
to hear your thoughts
to listen to your midnight lullabies
(and for sure its gonna rain tomorrow morning)

yes, i know it is a sin
to hold your hands,
to hold you tight,
to never let you go,
or
to ever leave you for it is
so disastrous to even think bout that.*

but baby,
you know what is the most sinful among these sins?

it is the sin of which i committed,
the first time my heart fell for you.
and i will not stop

for it is the heavenly sin.

this ain't me anymore,
this shouldn't be me.
it wasn't supposed to be this way.
these thoughts can't stop but to keep running.

trust me baby,
trust me hard,
trust me deep,
trust me up up in the sky.

everything starts to be this way
when your existence becomes reality.

and baby,
i'm scared to wake myself from this dream,
this perfect fantasy,
or just a mere faded-blew away reality.