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Rachel Cloud Jan 2014
Bravery isn't about foolhardy acts of honor
it's admitting you're afraid
and still having the moral compass
to do what's right.
Rachel Cloud Nov 2013
Not of death, not of rot
Fear has found a softer spot
It gnaws and tears and rapes my heart
I never knew I feared apart
Rachel Cloud Oct 2013
I always fancied myself unafraid
of loss
and death

Maybe
It was the lack of people
close
and caring

People I loved or knew
or even
wanted
to know

Now, here I stand
at the precipice
of a revision
a simple one at that

A death
not harsh
or cruel
but one that was calm,
wished for
even

And you know what?
I am scared

Now that I finally have
People
that I love
and know
and care about

It's they who seek a bullet
or a knife
or perhaps the "peace"
of drowning

And I don't know
what to do
how to stop them
how to help

But I don't want to
be alone
and all I can think
to do
is to follow
Rachel Cloud Sep 2013
There are so many words, so many pent up sentences biting in my mind. Some are hurtful, others heartfelt, ones that slip out under the tongue, and those that are far more patient, festering. Excess secrets, a true abundance of dead emotions. And what am I to do? Weave the quiet hate and the screaming loneliness into words of gold no one will ever read. Papers in the hearth. Literary drawings hidden on sheaves of paper in the binding of books, and hidden in the margins. I find them.

And I burn them.

Those fragile, pre-shattered shards of my sanity strewn through my post-shattered being. Those hushed whispering shadow words. Inked in black, with blacker intent. But they make the fire beautiful. They make it glow with life as I burn bits of myself. Burn them away with  malice and fear and cowardice. And the fire dances with joy I can only feel imprinted on my dulled mirror of a soul. But it distorts and snaps. Snaps into shards with the blackest intent.

I fear I have more words to burn.
Rachel Cloud Aug 2013
The cold
and the ice
and the snow
and the frost
fades
from the air
and the trees
without cost

The grass
soon creeps
through the dirt
and the dead
indulging
itself
in what
the sun bled

And green
soon devours
all clean
and all white
a change
and a shift
with love
without spite
Something not quite so dark as normal. :)
Rachel Cloud Aug 2013
I write of pain
and suffering
and loss
but why?

I place myself
in the shoes
of my thoughts
my secrets
my friends
I'm cruel to them
but why?

Everyone,
real people,
ask me what's wrong
"What happened"
"Why so sad?"
but it's never that simple

Nothing happened
I haven't let it
I'm too busy
Hiding.
Rachel Cloud Jul 2013
Sometimes,
an ounce just isn't enough.
Then,
whatever was needing of prevention only spreads faster,
immunized by the pitiful attempts of eradication.
But at this point, a cure comes far too late.
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