I'm skeptical of his intentions,
Yet, he's sure about his feelings,
We've done this before,
We've don't this a million times,
His love for me fails,
Or that's what I believe,
But he hangs around,
waiting for me;

He's faster then I am,
I'm smarter then him though,
He treats me like a fool,
But he loves me foolish ways,
I don't believe what he says,
But I trust what he does,
And he sticks around,
Waiting for me;

I wait for the day,
That he turns away from me,
Going into the arms of another woman,
Who can love him tight,
Kiss him goodnight,
Forever to do what I couldn't,
But still he hangs around,
No matter the weather or time,
Waiting for me

I was hopeful,
You were haunting,
Now we stand together,
Somewhere we'd never thought we'd be,
Your calloused hand in mine,
My thigh brushing against yours,
I don't see anyone else in this room,
And my devils are saying give into you.

The delusion of our relationship,
No need to believe it,
We fit no mold,
Even we tried to say we were different,
But we were the same,
Denying the facts,
We'd never be able to stay;

Some couples say they'll last forever,
No false ideas about it,
At the end we'll have played a good game,
Either way, we both lost it,
Now we can wave,
Then apart we can leave,
With no gain, not much loss,
Together we'll never be.

The love I was searching for,
The hands I wanted to hold,
Every moment that passed by,
Every comment I made,
It didn't mean anything,
After the day that you found me.

Calloused hands slid over me then grips desperately;
The skin on my hips cry for mercy when he grabs hold of me,
I feel your head on my bare shoulder;
A beat of sweat drips down from your brow,
A long leg possessively lays over mine,
Your body tenses,
I know you're dying inside,
I feel the shake.
In sleep you're chased by nasty dreams,
Of a war that you remember distinctively.
His teeth set into my shoulder, I start to scream,
In a blink of an eye he was awake;
Panting, sweating, fearful;
His eyes look at me,
See's the destruction that he made,
It makes him feel like less of a man.
Standing to get a cigarette,
I press my cheek to his,
"I'm a monster" He says,
He believes it.
He's disgusted with himself looking at my ****** hips,
That's what a hero looks like I tell him,
He swears for mercy for himself;
I need a cigarette.

He wakes up at the crack of dawn,
Smokes a pack a day,
He likes a shot of whiskey; at the end of every day,
The sink is never washed the way I like,
My refrigerator has never been the same;
He forgets his coat on the floor,
He doesn't make seven figures a year,
I would love to say I adore him in every way,
But I don't think that every year when he forgets our anniversary,
Most would have parted ways,
But no, not me;
He does a lot wrong,
I'll never forget the day,
He asked my brother at Christmas dinner,
If he went either way,
But I love that man, with everything inside of me, that I won't deny.

I could never repay him for the right he does,
Although there's more wrongs
The way he holds me in bed,
The way he's the first to make coffee,
The way he puts my earrings away;
He hands me a ***** tonic,
He mows the lawn,
He kicks my tires,
Changes my oils at inconvenient times,
I know he lost his watch, I bought for his birthday,
But I could never repay the way he treats our son,
The way he tries to braid our daughter's hair,
The way after all these years he still whispers "I love you" in my ear,
I don't care if he could ignore every Valentines day,
I'll still love him for his rights.

Another restless fight,
This'll keep me up all night,
I know there's nothing I can do,
So we blame it on my so called "attitude",
You stand high acting crude,
Protection that what I wanted to provide,
I couldn't help Daddy dying,
There's nothing more I can give,
Now like enemies we stand on separate lines;
Muttering about how we're fine,
But pain still lives inside,
The past still consumes us,
We still argue about what we didn't do.