“DARLENE, LOOK, there're 2 young lovers ******* in the dark.”
“*******? Don't you mean kissing?”
   “What'd I say?”
   “*******.”
   “No thanks, I've already eaten.”
   “You meant park, right?”
   “No I didn't.”
   “I don't care for your brand of fun. I say no thanks to it.”
   “Darlene listen. When's the central government going to show
the passionless resentment, or resolve, that'll lay claim to the
unseen problems inherent in my life?”
   Darlene just sat there: so dumb, so beautiful. It seemed that she was unconcerned, disconnected, lost in Darlene World. Perhaps a rattle snake stuffed into her underpants would stir her? It's worth a try. I'd be willing to give it a go.
   “Look over there Darlene!” I'd say to which she'd reply:
“Do not stuff a rattle snake into my underpants.”
   “Okay, if that's what you don't want me to do then I shall abide by your wishes, besides, I've got more important & exciting things to do than stuff a rattle snake into your underpants.”
   “Like what?” She'd ask.
   “Like plenty of things,” I'd say, although I'd be
unable, or perhaps unwilling, to list any.
   “Could it be that you have nothing better to do than stuff a
rattle snake into my underpants?” She'd ask intuitively.
   “No! That's not it at all. I love you
Darlene. Can't you understand that?”
   She looked at me penetratively, her underpants snakeless.
“And I love you. Let's find some way to express our newly-
discovered  fondness for one another without you stuffing
a rattle snake into my underpants.”
   “Maybe, but I still might do it for kicks you know?”
  “Well, sure, as long as you know the difference. ---
Is that your niece? What's she doing with that *****?”
   “Oh, him, I think he's determined to make her pregnant.”
   “That's wonderful!” Darlene proclaimed as we
were all negroes so it didn't mean anything anyhow.

Fly over neighborhoods like the cops do! This chopper has it all: flashing lights, tail section, rotors!!! You'll be Mister Big **** at the controls! No helicopter flying experience is necessary! This baby flies itself! Tired of women ******* at you: morning, noon and night?! Get even with these filthy, clap-ridden ***** by dropping bombs on them out the window of your free police helicopter!

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I must **** trees, miss fleas, kiss cheese & hiss bees like nervously-
nervous nut cases with a neurotic, nerve-racking, miss-ease disease
I will **** trees, miss fleas, hiss bees & kiss cheeses like nervously-
nervous nut jobs with neurotical, nerve-racking, miss-ease diseases
Half-way up from the bottom down, left of center, tilted backwards,
is the contorted stance that cripples contortionists lunging forwards
Charles Puffy's jumbled diphtherial litter & rot got him caught cold
& brought to higher authorities who knew old Puffy needn't be shot
I must **** freeze, miss fleas, kiss pleas & sis knees like nervously-
nervous **** aces with a neurotic, verve-backing, mist-fees disease
in prison abuse programs for los Indios maricones of British Belize
where we choke Chinese grocers often for greenish imports of peas
from divine Cathay where Falun Gong worship's a Maoistical tease
for the likes of Planters honey peanut butter franchisee John Cleese
who unites skin-sloughing French sheep with shepherds who fleece
along knee, shoulder & pelvic joints & where pink **** ***** crease
which is alright with ****-flap pervert, the flitty queer Edwin Meese
who seeks gay normality & normal gayety with 32 gym locker keys
that unlock a twilit exo-scientometrical face that God frozenly frees
under the gun like a he/she; as known by goys blown in shot breeze
through statues soiled by pigeons above ½ moon toenails of tweeze
long after the decapitation of 91-year-old screen writer Robert Lees
whose bid to keep head & torso as 1 died like Yukio's Shogun pleas
whose fight to keep his head & frame attached died in ½-assed seas
just like ****** Bruce Jenner showing he's a she by varying degrees
that has his ill family of mule-******* climbing like chimps up trees
that has his donkey-******' family climbin' like apes up jungle trees
where syndicated-business-share-differentials run like a viral sneeze
brought on anaphylactically from the sting of gay Cuban killer bees

that you won't forget (unless you're a real dog) with Fido's Memory-Enhancing Dog food! Stop pimping & pumping hoes when you can be an ambulance driver! That's where the big bucks are! Ambulance driving!!! My neighbor was one of those: more gay than a picnic basket and now he's dead; died in a Pygmy stampede when he was 47.

I won't be renting an old woman for Christmas. Last year, the one I rented crapped-out and fell off my balcony. I was so upset that I hid her corpse for 5 months. This year I'm considering leasing 3 Mexican families on a trial basis. If I have to, I can always switch to Venezuelan convicts.

HYPER-OBESE HOMOSEXUAL COUPLE USES ANCIENT HOMOSEXUAL WEIGHT-LOSS TRICKS TO SAVE THEIR HOMOSEXUAL MARRIAGE! And you can too! Ever wonder why homosexual couples are so thin? It's not from going to church, that's for sure. Meet Steve and Debbie, 2 homosexuals: 1 man, 1 woman, who've found the secret to slimming down. Debbie: "When I first married Steve, I weighed 340 pounds and he weighed 375. We decided that the time was right to have a baby, and that we would need to lose 200 pounds each." Steve: "Debbie's right about that! The truth was: we were just too heavy, so I took action. The first thing I did was quit my job and commit 3 acts of arson. While in prison I became a Christian." Debbie: "Steve's 45-year prison term taught me several valuable lessons." Steve: "I'm a homosexual again! Can you believe it?!" Debbie: "Oh no! What will my lezzy lover think?!"

FOR SALE: portable building...would make a perfect detention cell for 1 to 3 hitch-hikers/stragglers or this building could be converted to a venereal disease testing/treatment clinic: $1,250...also: large sculpture of a woman with glandular tumors made of sandstone: $400...also: 34 amputated Russian Mafia thumbs preserved in *****: $200.

When I was young I thunk Chicklet was quite the sassy, saucy dish:
double stitching ******, stripping for money, eating discounted fish
and majoring in alcoholics while imitating crapped-out Lillian Gish
******* on Easter portraits to the wall as that was her Easter wish.

“What's for supper?” I asked my mommy who often provided food.
“Garbage! Mounds of it!” She duly replied not even remotely rude.
“Holy Moses!” I moaned havin' recently had useless surgery again.
“Shut your cake hole!” Barked she harshly like Barbie does to Ken.

YOU PUNCHED ME IN THE KIDNEY LIKE ONE LION-TAMER KIDNEY-PUNCHES ANOTHER LION-TAMER, so I retaliated (or responded) by throwing your grandmother off our ship into shark-infested waters after rubbing her down with fresh rabbit blood, but it wasn't really your grandmother (because I like her too much), just a plastic mannequin (or waxen effigy or bronze statue) of her.

(of the defunct T.V. series 𝘔𝘺 𝘛𝘩𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘚𝘰𝘯𝘴)

“Chip!” Ernie bellowed.; “What do you want you stupid, *******?” Chip answered; “Who are you calling a stupid, *******? You're the real stupid, *******, not me!” Ernie exclaimed.; “Oh yeah?” Chip questioned.; “I'm not half the stupid, ******* that you are!” Ernie informed.; “Yes, you are!” Chip retorted.; “No, I'm not!” Ernie indignantly replied.; “I say you are!” Chip boldly proclaimed.; “No way am I a stupid, *******!” Ern, as he was hardly ever called, reasoned.; “Listen,” Chip began in earnest, “it's no secret around here, and you can ask Uncle Charley, that you are the dumbest and the stupidest ******* ever!”; Ernie stood up and faced Chip. “Well,” he began frankly, “Uncle Charley is senile so he's not able to judge who's the stupidest ******* here!”
   Just then  Rob, played by Don Grady, came in. “Hey Chip. Hey Ernie.”; “Hey Robbie,” Chip muttered. “Who's the stupidest *******: me or stupid, ******* Ernie?”; Rob put down the shoe box that he was carrying. “I guess Ernie is.”; “Thanks, Robbie,” Chip thanked Rob, thoroughly relieved because the issue of who is the stupidest of dumb *****, he or Ernie, was settled once and for all even though one must use stupider as the comparative (comparing 2) & stupidest as a superlative (comparing 3 or more); even though stupider & stupidest ain't even proper words.

Why do you use a stick figure to mock the skinny mayor of Lumber City? Go away and drop dead! You're not Oprah! You know what I said, so kiss me on the lips like my dead **** lover used to, without the Alfredo sauce and pasta fazool!

♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿
Red is so great! It reminds me of pink as it is reminiscent of orange
the off-red color. I killed my sister because she married my brother,
if not for love, then it must have been for some stupid reason other.
♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿
♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿♿

SHARPENING THE BUS DRIVER'S **** WARTS WITH A TUNA FISH SCALER - Dan tried being nice to the bus driver but it didn't take. Each day the driver would snarl when Dan offered to sharpen his **** warts until one day when the driver was having a fatal stroke or aneurism blow-out and needed immediate **** wart attention, or he would die. "Quickly! Remove the bus driver's bus pants! I'm going in now!" Dan exclaimed. "Okay!" A helpful passenger responded. After 1 hour, the bus driver was revived. "What happened?" He asked groggily. "We sharpened your **** warts with a tuna fish scaler!" Dan answered pridefully.

De-population is the edict, not just notion, of a genocide diagnostic
or of a burgeoning Nigerian democracy that's militarily enthusiastic
with countless Winnie Mandelas who're egotistical & protagonistic.