I feel youโthese words are like a weight I can't bear, intended for me but hollow, fading before they hit.
You murdered me, didn't you? I'm somewhere untainted, in a spot I can't go to yet keep ending up in, like if I was never supposed to belong but can't seem to get out.
We were never meant to beโthat's the part I finally understand, despite my instincts.
I thought I could get away from it, forget about it, but your silence continues to ringโa persistent echo that I can't escape.
You don't have to say it; I can hear it anyhow.
The empty areas where we used to be are a piece of you that I will never possess.
A love that was never truly mine.
And, sure, I ruined it.
Of course, I did.
I trusted in this and in youโthis ruin.
I believed the shattering captivated me, but it was something else I convinced myself.
You say you want peace, but I don't believe you know what it means.
Is it letting go? Is it more than that?
Is it setting me free or setting yourself free from me?
We'll continue to go in different directions, saying we've forgotten about the hurt.
Learning to cope with what is absent.
They'd tell me to go away, to give upโbut if you love me, say it, and say it louder, until all that remained was quiet, the place where we once were.
I'll keep traveling, but I will never stop seeing you.
I'll never stop feeling you; this unhealed pain leaves no scars.
It just remains open, no matter how much time we spend.
So this is the last line, the last thread winding down, and the last thing I'll never speak aloud.
We let go and go on, but I'll always remember you, even when it's not right.
And maybe, in time, we'll both fade into something different.
Not together, not as we imagined, but separate, and that will suffice.
Perhaps that's the closest we'll ever come to peace.