Dancing with Jail-Bait; The Joys of Heart Disease; Cooking with Squirrel-Meat; The Intellectual Depth of Oprah; Beneficial Porcine Flu Serums; The ******-Allure of Rosie O'Donnell; Charitable Prostitutes; ****** Wives into Hygiene; Diapered Fashion Plates; Knowledgeable Atheists; N.A.S.A.'s Dedication to the Truth; Young Women Without Tattoos; Economically-Successful Collectivism; The Rationality of the Mind Female; Dainty Grizzly Bears; The Late Michael Jackson: At the Left Hand of God; Monogamous Western Women; Trustworthy Clerics; Surviving Hospice; David Carradine's Closet-Saving-Space Tips; Surviving Cremation; Snazzy Chazzy Bono's Chic Unisexual Fashion Pointers; Surviving Abortion; Capping Your Urinary Output with 33 Easy Steps; Sissies in *******; Pimples in Paradise; Languishing on a Pig Farm; Rednecks in Medical School; Health Benefits of Imbibing Sodium Fluoride as Provided in the Public Water Supply; Prudent Moves Among Central Bankers; Beautiful Women Who Manage Turnpike Traffic; Negroes in Hot Rods

Webco's COWBOY HAT AND **** STRAP COMBINATION saves the average cowboy basketball player lots of money. Why buy 2 things when you can buy just 1? Are you a fast talker who enjoys the company of pagan women who "put out for ten dollars"? Who isn't? When you're wearing Webco's **** strap cowboy hat, the pagans come to you! Are you tired of "****-flop"? Well, when you're wearing the cowboy hat as a **** strap the ****-flop will stop. "My **** was flopping like a carp on the dock till I strapped on my **** strap cowboy hat! Now I'm living like the prince of France all day, every day!" Exclaimed Jamaal Jackson, a popular ghetto rapper who doesn't own a belt.