[A dialogue between Brigid and her boss, Hollis. Hollis has called Brigid into his office and gestured to close the door.]
Brigid: Hey, sorry. You know how hard it is getting him outta here when he's got a problem.
Hollis: I do, I do. Go ahead and pop a squat for a second, dear.
Brigid: So what's going on?
Hollis: Brigid, your fingers are always so ashy.
[Brigid wipes her hands on the darkest part of her faded slacks.]
Brigid: Oh, yeah, that's a bad habit that's getting worse. I was just in the bathroom, too. So I guess I should probably start washing my hands more often.
Hollis: No, hon, it's not about the ashes -- you're smoking weed in the office. More and more it seems like.
Brigid: Oh I mean, I've been smoking for a while.
Hollis: Not in the office.
Brigid: Well, now I do.
Hollis: You don't see anything wrong with that?
Brigid: I mean, you never really said anything about it when I brought it in the first time, so I just kinda kept on going. And that, that was like, at least two weeks ago, I think.
Hollis: I don't think it's been as long as you're thinking.
Brigid: I see what you're trying to do here. However long doesn't matter -- I know for a fact you've seen me before and didn't say anything.
Hollis: I'm saying something now.
Brigid: Yes you are.
Brigid: Oh.
Hollis: Look, hon. Could you just go use the balcony round back?
Brigid: Well sure, but I kinda have to be at the desk, you know? That's why I never leave on my breaks, either.
Hollis: Brigid, it looks bad.
Brigid: What, smoking weed?
Hollis: Yes, it looks real bad. It reflects the professionalism of the Human Services Office. Or the lackthereof.
Brigid: How?
Hollis: I believe it's popular opinion that being under the influence of any substance impairs your ability to dutifully perform your work, and perform work that sets the best possible standard.
Brigid: Actually, and I kid you not, it really, really helps me perform my work. See, without it, I believe, I would not be able to live up to your standards.
Hollis: You're acting like--
Brigid: Hollis, please, for the love of god. I'm such an awesome employee, right? Always upright. Always for the good of the people. Last night! Last night I went to Davis's place for some coffee.
Hollis: I thought you were going to stop doing that.
Brigid: You should have seen it. Oh god, the mess that went down. Unruly mercenary helping hands serving fists up to unappreciative patrons, sex workers slinging emselves over tables and the bar, sweat and all that other nasty body water mixing up next to all the food and alcohol.
Hollis: What--
Brigid: Hollis, I went out back for a cigarette and there were people milling around in the alley fucking each other. People are fucking screwing behind Davis's place, and you're worried about just, a little bit of the good stuff defacing the image our city.
Hollis: Jesus Christ, okay, alright. You're right, that's disgusting.
Brigid: Told ya.
Hollis: When you gotta smoke, just ask Helen to watch the front for you.
Brigid: What if I just put the pipe away when someone's at the counter?
Hollis: I'd really prefer outside.
Brigid: Okay, how about, if I go to the window. So that way there's no smoke inside?
Hollis: You're just about fucking impossible, little girl. Forget I said anything, forget the whole damned thing. I ask you for one favor, and you can't even do that.
Brigid: I do all your other favors.
[Brigid gets up and walks to the door.]
Hollis: You're still giving me that discount on Cheese, right?
Brigid: Absolutely. I'm gonna take a break and go out back for a cigarette.